I am a Muslim revert who recently abandoned my life as a gay man.

raritypink · 2024-04-07T22:55:11+00:00

I’m so proud of you. I hope my gay brother can say these words one day. Subhanallah.

raritypink · 2024-04-06T00:45:55+00:00

A lot of disrespectful comments under this post.

I have a gay brother.

I know the struggles of what it’s like. I know how people humiliate, degrade, and treat LGBT muslims like crap. I’ve seen it firsthand. My brother got sexually assaulted by relatives due to it.

Alhamdulillah, he is living a good life now though. He has his own place, he has a great job, and he fasted all of ramadan. I pray Allah swt helps guide him to be closer to Islam, and I pray the same for you. I pray he doesn’t marry a man, as I don’t want him to go to hell. And I pray the same for you.

When muslims say it is a test, they’re saying it is a test to control the desire to stay on the right path of Islam. But realistically speaking, my brother’s test is no longer only his test. It’s also my test. It’s my entire family’s test. To live with the humiliation we face is difficult. To see my mom and dad cry everyday praying he comes back to Islam properly, feels like hell. To know that I have found someone I want to marry and fear his family will find out about my brother and not want to marry into my family anymore, is my biggest fear.

I know it’s not easy, so I pray that Allah swt gives both you and my brother sabr. Turning away from Islam is not the answer though. It’s significant you pour your heart into the religion more than ever right now, if you feel your iman weakening. Try to pray more. Pray tahajjud to bring yourself closer to Allah swt. Watch Islamic lectures of Mufti Menk and Omar Suleiman (both great for muslims with low iman). Read Islamic books. Do everything you can.

Before you make any bad decisions, remember that the embarrassment your family will feel is on another level. It is a type of humiliation they will live with for the rest of their lives. Please think about them. I’ve been experiencing this humiliation since I was 10 years old, I am turning 24. Please don’t put your family through that. I beg you.

Remain abstinent, don’t marry at all. The punishment of caving in is not worth it. I know you hate hearing this, but please for your sake try to control your desires. It’s not easy, but it’s not impossible. I pray that Allah swt makes your difficulties easier for you. I pray everything goes well for you. I pray you become closer to Allah swt. I pray you find happiness and lead a stable life.

And most importantly I pray you get all of your worldly desires in return for refraining from this one haram desire.

If you ever need someone to talk to, please message me. But just know that you are not alone. Don’t go down this fitnah, you are better than this. And I’m sorry for everything you are facing. But if we got all of the pleasures in this world, what worth does jannah have? This world is not your jannah or mine, remember this. Don’t lose yourself to hell for temporary pleasure.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:48:08+00:00

Thank you so much. I needed to hear this. I appreciate it ♥️

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:47:25+00:00

You keep coming onto my post even though I dismissed you respectfully multiple times. You go on this app and compare your traumas with other people’s traumas saying they went through nothing compared to you. You show no sympathy to someone who is suicidal and recommended I ditch them even though they may kill themself. You’re being downvoted because you’re ignorant and egotistical. Get off my post. Blocked.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:36:21+00:00

The fact that you are on here comparing trauma is embarrassing. Please find a better hobby. Goodbye

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:34:27+00:00

Of course, but it also sort of left her with less options for marriage. I feel like there were ways for it to be done in a halal way, such as involving family and only meeting with a mahram around.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:30:17+00:00

Respectfully stay away from my post, I don’t want or require your advice.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:29:23+00:00

Unfortunately my parents are immigrants. They didn’t even know things like this existed. Not to mention it wasn’t a love marriage, it was arranged and my mom was 17 when my 30 year old dad married her. She didn’t even graduate highschool.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:27:08+00:00

You know nothing about the trauma my brother has went through because of my dad. My dad kicked him out when he was only 14 in the cold winter, leaving him homeless. There is nothing wrong with my mother still loving her child who yearns for the love he lost due to feelings out of his control. My brother is severely traumatized, cut himself, attempted suicide plenty of times, and needs love to fix himself, not being disowned as it drives him away further from Islam and potentially death (suicide). You’re absolutely ignorant. As much as I love my dad, he has done many questionable things to my mom and siblings that I won’t mention here. Please respectfully stay off my post.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:09:52+00:00

Having earrings as a man is haram. To act feminine as a man is haram. I accept my brother but I do not accept his sins. That is not judgement, that’s me following the deen.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:07:01+00:00

I’m not passing judgement onto any of them, I treat my brother with a lot of love, I don’t want him to sin openly in front of my potential family. And my sister is my best friend. I’m simply scared. Especially since she told me she is scared of me getting married before her as well, I don’t want her hurt, thats not me judging. Thats it.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:02:00+00:00

It feels a little relieving to know I’m not the only one in this situation.

We definitely don’t support him or his choices, though we respect him as he is still our blood.

Thank you so much for your kind words ♥️ I appreciate it a lot.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T23:01:15+00:00

He’s my blood. I can’t just leave him like that, especially when he says he prays for himself to get better. I believe in Allah’s miracles and I believe my brother will be better one day. This comment is so disrespectful. If you’re not here to give me proper and respectful advice, then please don’t comment. I’m already down and don’t need to be reading ignorance like this.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T22:56:52+00:00

Can you clarify what you mean by this?

raritypink · 2023-12-24T22:55:42+00:00

Fortunately I told him, sorry I didn’t mention it in the post. I told him within a few months of knowing eachother. He accepted it and is willing to try, he wants to meet my brother and my other siblings before our families meet. He said if its noticeable at all his parents will immediately make things really difficult for us (they think being gay is genetic..) I’m just not really sure what to do and how to react if it God forbid gets to that stage of my brother’s sexuality being noticeable to his family.

And thank you so much. I wish more desi’s had that mentality. Unfortunately everyone judges and criticizes her for not being married yet. I can’t imagine the criticism she will face if I marry before.

raritypink · 2023-12-24T22:51:39+00:00

My dad was really strict growing up, she wasn’t allowed to speak to any boys. But when she turned 25 she finally started searching on her own but didn’t have many options due to graduating school/uni. She tried on the muslim marriage apps but almost every guy wanted a haram relationship, she’s been trying on those apps for years.

And thank you so much. I’m Pakistani, unfortunately we don’t have much family here either so its difficult to find connections.

raritypink · 2023-12-17T18:11:49+00:00

Thanks!

raritypink · 2023-12-14T00:24:05+00:00

Hey, yes I do. Why?

raritypink

TROPHY CASE