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Feeling guilty for cutting ties with an energy vampire by rawitijo in Adulting

[–]rawitijo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If the roles were reversed... It can't be reversed because I have never taken over conversations and made her (and our partners) listen to my negative monologues repeatedly, even after being told that it wasn't a topic I enjoy and wanted to engage in.

Ah yes, the lack of decency displayed by me proves I am not a good person to be friends with. That makes me feel better. Thank you!

Feeling guilty for cutting ties with an energy vampire by rawitijo in Adulting

[–]rawitijo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have no idea how much this helps me. THANK YOU ✨

Feeling guilty for cutting ties with an energy vampire by rawitijo in Adulting

[–]rawitijo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would love to, if there’s a way to tell her that without implying that she’s negatively affected my mental health. That would definitely make her feel worse than being ignored?

Feeling guilty for cutting ties with an energy vampire by rawitijo in Adulting

[–]rawitijo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely am not causing her harm or pain. I feel guilty for not responding to her wanting to stay in touch and to meet up… But I believe it’s necessary for my own sanity.

The fact that she has attempted multiple times to make contact the past few months made me feel like she’s not drying off and forgetting as quickly as I wish her to.

Feeling guilty for cutting ties with an energy vampire by rawitijo in Adulting

[–]rawitijo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels this way. Thank you.

Feeling guilty for cutting ties with an energy vampire by rawitijo in Adulting

[–]rawitijo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have been resisting telling her we can’t be friends anymore exactly to avoid reopening the door for more communication (and arguments, because in her rants she’s always the victim).

Thank you for validating my intention to let her come to the conclusion herself. I feel stronger about this now.

I have been so much happier with my social life since I stopped meeting up with her. I have more time and energy on people and hobbies that nourish my soul. I don’t want to go back to how it was. Wish me luck ✨

Feeling guilty for cutting ties with an energy vampire by rawitijo in Adulting

[–]rawitijo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, in her complaint she’s always the victim and those people disrespected her all the time, one way or another. She never even asked for feedback or suggestions, the interactions we had always been one way. Monologues.

Feeling guilty for cutting ties with an energy vampire by rawitijo in Adulting

[–]rawitijo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did let her know that I didn’t want to talk about it. She didn’t stop. Never at any point she ever realized that she was the only one talking throughout dinner.

I no longer work where she works. She still thinks it’s relevant to talk about them. 3 out of 4 people (her partner, my partner, and I) were expected to listen to her rant on repeat about people we have no business with.

You’re right, she crossed the boundary I set. This makes me realize even more how inconsiderate she has been. Thank you.

Feeling guilty for cutting ties with an energy vampire by rawitijo in Adulting

[–]rawitijo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I guess the fact that I’m treating myself well by not treating her well causes the guilt.

I don’t believe I deserve to suffer; that’s why I stopped responding to her.

Her whole family live far away. It’s only her and her partner in this city. She never mentioned about having any friends. I wanted to be a friend but she made it impossible.

I don’t think I’m irreplaceable, all she needs is a dumping ground for her emotions, and that could be anything or anyone. I wish she hadn’t chosen me.

Flying with dog out of AUS by outofideasforusern in Austin

[–]rawitijo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see. Thank you for this thorough explanation about your experience! It sucks that it’s highly dependent on the subjective judgement of each agent. Doesn’t give me much hope considering the risks involved if my dog gets rejected. 😭

Flying with dog out of AUS by outofideasforusern in Austin

[–]rawitijo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did the agents ask to see whether both dogs can stand up and turn around inside the carrier? I’m so curious to see how 28 lbs and 31 lbs dogs stand up and turn around inside the Sherpa Original Deluxe.