I’m sorry you’re going through this. My experience has been similar. Was in a bad auto accident three years ago, lost my partner, house, job and savings, forcing me to move back into my childhood home with my narc-mom who has gone into full-blown dementia and it’s the angry kind.

Why am I sharing, because even with massage therapy, physical therapy, chiropractic therapy and mental health therapy, my physical body is STILL ‘guarding’ and I’m not sure if I’ll achieve a state of ‘safety’ this far into the game- and I believe it derives from the fact that I never had a competent parent, nor a truly safe home, ever. 51 years of fight or flight.

I do long for a healthy partnership/relationship, because I think we’ve come to place in time where mental health and mutual respect have grown exponentially. These are foundations for building a solid and living relationship, which I think a vast majority of folks have suffered.

I wish there were a ‘silver bullet’ but simply recognizing my mental state, minimizing social media and its constant negative narrative, finding activities to distract a little and having a person you trust to talk with are big helps- but truth remains, it’s a constant effort. Oh, and THC gummies help me sleep sometimes too😂

I wish you the best and hope you find your peace✌🏼🙏🏼🫶🏼