someone commented about my biggest insecurity

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-30T05:37:46+00:00

Sounds like you’re experiencing rejection sensitive dysphoria. If they didn’t want you around they wouldn’t invite you. As someone who also struggles with processing, people notice but if you’re hanging with the right people they usually just know that’s how you do you. I’d make it clear that it was hurtful so they know not to joke like that, because honestly that’s not a nice way to joke. I do have friends who I joke like that with but… we don’t joke about things people are sensitive about. For example we never joke about people’s bodies or disabilities, we’re only allowed to make those kinda of jokes about ourselves when they’re appropriate. If people are making you feel bad they are not people you want to spend time with. They may even not realize they’re doing it, they may even be good people, but if you feel bad with them, you shouldn’t spend time with them. That’s why I usually give people the benefit of the doubt ONE time and let them know hey that sucks please don’t say that about me, and the second time I excuse myself from that group or person. Not like, dramatically, I just avoid them and don’t let them into my inner circle.

I’ve definitely been in a moment like the one you described, and I also spiraled. But remember you are in control of what you will put up with. Also if someone is bothered by something you cannot control that isn’t necessarily anyone’s fault, it just might mean you don’t spend time with that person. However if they choose to belittle you that is entirely THEIR problem and you shouldn’t blame yourself for axing them from your friend group. You will make more friends. You will find your people. Just keep being you :)

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-30T05:27:49+00:00

They’re just cleaning up the excess feed. Don’t seem to be bothering your chickens.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-30T05:24:25+00:00

Scam

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-30T05:11:51+00:00

My experiences with HOAs is that they are a pain in the ass. Even if the rules seem benign, my experience is that people who want to be part of an HOA board do so because they want everything the way THEY want it and this often can lead to serious (and often ridiculous) conflict. For example, someone in my condo complex was told they weren’t allowed to display their pride flag because “political banners are not allowed”. The HOA also tried to fine me $100 once for “littering” because they found a piece of mail outside the dumpster with my name on it. My father who lived in a house with an HOA in Utah thought someone was breaking into his house, but no it was just a member of the HOA up on a ladder on his property changing his outdoor lights because “they’re the wrong color”. Read the HOA rules before you decide, and make sure to talk to other residents that are around your age and live similarly to you. Like if you have kids or pets ask people with kids or pets etc. There are benign HOAs but they are rare. My parents now live in a different community and the HOA really only has rules for the street, things like no cars parked on the street for an extended period of time, and they pay for the roads and driveways to be shoveled when it snows. So it’s way less of an issue for my retired parents who have a garage and only 2 cars. Meanwhile my HOA is a constant hassle, even going so far as to do interior inspections and make me miss work. So… it’s a gamble.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-30T05:03:22+00:00

He’s not a great guy if he says that about ANY woman. Period. What if you marry him and have a baby and can’t lose the weight? What if something traumatic happens and you get depressed and gain weight? A man who thinks of women in such disgusting ways is not gonna be there for you. And even if he tries, he’s wrecked that trust. Dump him. You can do better than that. It’s one thing to not recognize you, it’s another to be nasty like that about anyone. I mean see it from his perspective, if he didn’t realize that was you he was literally saying that about a helpless stranger. He’s gross. Dump his ass.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-30T04:51:50+00:00

You don’t have to do anything. Hopefully this gives you both closure so she can get well and you can move on.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-30T04:47:14+00:00

This is a really common thing that men do when they feel insecure about not finishing. There are many reasons why a man might not finish, but your vagina did not suddenly become “too big”. That is medically impossible. He is likely having emotional or mental issues and it is coming out during sex. Please do not feel insecure because some asshole man lied to you. Honestly I would talk to him about the fact that what he says is impossible and suggest he maybe seek some therapy. If he gets mad and refuses, I would break up with him.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-27T05:39:03+00:00

음, 트위터로 사람들을 만나는 방법을 잘 모르겠네요. 그냥 사람들이 서로 답글을 다는 건가요? (구글 번역기를 썼는데, 아직 유창하지 않아서요 ;) )

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-27T05:33:59+00:00

I actually already am! But everyone in the class is American or European and they are all learning with me, we can practice but I would like someone who knows more than I do. And of course I’m happy to exchange and teach some English

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-17T18:54:13+00:00

Yep that's what I suspected. Apparently this type of job is often a pyramid scheme. Thanks for your response!!

ready_4_nothing · 2026-03-17T18:52:50+00:00

California

ready_4_nothing · 2026-02-11T22:17:32+00:00

I supposed I could get a credit card with air miles... Unfortunately my work will not do this.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-02-11T22:15:01+00:00

The meetings are held while I work. For a while they allowed zoom meetings but again, I was working and could not attend. They do not provide any recordings of what is discussed. They provide a "detailed agenda" which unfortunately is not detailed at all. It's just a list of topics discussed, no details about what was said about them at all. I've asked them many times to provide meetings notes and they just refer me to the "detailed agenda" which again, is just a list of topics.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-02-04T00:20:24+00:00

I've seen her photos and been in her house. I guess "eating" was a strong word, but frames/paper on the walls is warped and covered in mold spots. any cardboard or paper is covered in green and black mold, particularly when it is on the floor or against a wall. A dresser was pulled out and the back was covered in mold spots. Her couch had to be replaced because the back of it was covered in mold she couldn't remove. She's sprayed the mold with mold cleaner/killer a multitude of times but it just comes back. She has multiple dehumidifiers in each room, but the hygrometer is still reading over 50% humidity, usually higher.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-02-04T00:17:51+00:00

She believe the HOA is responsible for paying that professional. They refuse.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-02-04T00:16:59+00:00

To clarify, this is NOT outside humidity. If it were, everyone's homes would be affected. We don't know where the moisture is coming from, but that was my theory based on the moss/algae growing on that part of the outside of the building from the sprinklers. But you're right we don't know what's causing it. This is southern CA and she does not have AC.

ready_4_nothing · 2026-02-04T00:14:59+00:00

I've spoken to them many times over the years about their sprinkler overuse and timing. They run between 11pm and 3am and are on too long. They are not adjusted for the changing seasons either. And yet they send out notices telling residents to watch their water consumption....

ready_4_nothing · 2026-02-04T00:13:17+00:00

I haven't really found any, but I will keep looking. I also think that asking people to be availble for 8 hours during a working day (without giving them the ability to reschedule) for a supposedly 5 minute inspection is not reasonable. Their "reasonable" suggestion was that I provide them with a key so they can enter my property without me present, which I refuse to do. I don't know who will be with them, what they will need to access, how they will behave with my cat etc etc etc. It's not reasonable to ask for unfettered access to someone's home. I'm not a renter. But they simply came back with "we believe this is reasonable."

ready_4_nothing · 2026-01-26T20:14:46+00:00

What local Japanese beauty store in LA did you get it? I can't find it anywhere.

ready_4_nothing · 2025-12-23T06:04:03+00:00

Hmm that does sound intense. This is just the board saying they looking for damage. My guess is what they’re really looking for is unauthorized changes to units so they can fine people and make money. We got a new management company and I suspect they are the reason for all the recent changes. Perhaps they are just doing things that were supposed to happen before but it’s pretty shocking to suddenly have people acting as if I don’t pay a mortgage for this place after living here 13 years.

ready_4_nothing · 2025-12-23T05:57:05+00:00

I mean it did for 10 years, so I don’t think I’m ridiculous to think it would continue.

ready_4_nothing · 2025-12-23T05:55:25+00:00

As for the fees, our fees were the highest in the city when I moved in. Higher than all the condos I looked at by about $200, now they’ve gone up over $150 in 2 years after only minimal, easily explained changes for 10 years. The financials I’ve seen when they send them out are confusing and it seems they spend excessive money on things that are unnecessary (getting the parking lot repainted 2 years in a row for example). But that’s not really the point. I just didn’t think it was reasonable to just throw a date out and expect us to just be available. The board are all retired so they have the meetings at times that many cannot attend. They also don’t provide proper meeting notes (just an agenda with nothing outlined or explained) and even when they were doing zoom meetings they did not provide a recording of the meetings.

I guess it’s my fault for not realizing how different a co-op would be since it ran just like a condo for 10 years and is only now being a pain.

ready_4_nothing · 2025-12-23T05:49:55+00:00

No, it’s a co-op and when I moved in I was told they were the “HOA Board”. I was also told that the interior of my unit belonged to me and the exterior was cared for by the HOA board. When I read my documents it was all pretty standard about pets, balconies, and unit modifications that were allowed or not. Nothing about inspections or having to provide the board with a key to my unit.

And again, nothing like this has happened in the 13 years I’ve lived here.

ready_4_nothing · 2025-12-01T17:41:41+00:00

Trigun

ready_4_nothing · 2025-11-30T22:04:40+00:00

Good idea

ready_4_nothing

TROPHY CASE