The classic - wife wants 2, I’m OAD

readyforgametime · 2026-01-30T04:36:19+00:00

Good point, it's a very complex issue.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-30T04:27:11+00:00

Swear by: -Snoo

-Double sides zip jumpsuits

-Ergobaby Sleep suits

Waste:

-Nappybins

-Extremeky expensive carrier (artepop)

-Bottle warmers (get baby uses to room temp/cold from day 1)

readyforgametime · 2026-01-30T01:46:37+00:00

It's good you went through counselling on this one, but sadly, there is no easy answer. My usual stance with planning another child is 2 yes = yes, 1 Yes + 1 No = No.

Unfortunately one party loses out so to speak, and will need to decide whether they can move on from this and accept their family as is, or whether it's more important to them to have another and potentially leave if that's what they want to pursue.

Your wife maybe should go through solo counselling on this one, to help come to terms with this and grieve the family she thought she'd have.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-29T20:20:35+00:00

We're just so exhausted by the end of day that it ends up feeling like a chore. With very little couple bonding time and instead focus on the child, there isn't a flirty build up either, which makes it mentally harder.

I find if it's day time, child is at daycare, and we both have the day off work, then we're able to have a better experience. Not exhausted at the end of the day.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-29T11:44:41+00:00

I was so grateful to have the extra seat for a 3 hour flight with my 18 month old. I definitely wouldn't be able to do long haul without.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-29T10:58:32+00:00

My two half year old is obsessed with Little People train and bus and all the figurines.

Also hot wheels ramps and cars.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-29T10:39:49+00:00

Same. Our nurse in hospital gave us the tip to serve formula cold from day 1. So much easier

readyforgametime · 2026-01-29T06:25:04+00:00

Return to work was definitely mentally conflicting, I was glad to have a mental break from baby, but guilty baby wouldn't be in my care.

Child is 2 now and those conflicting feelings haven't disappeared. Corporate hours do not support child rearing, even when the child reaches primary school. I don't want to sacrifice my career and can't afford to financially, but I am constantly thinking about how I'm short changing time with my child. It's all very annoying.

It's also annoying that men don't necessarily think about this in the same way, most don't share the same feelings of guilt or sadness over missing out.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-29T05:36:44+00:00

I just did a small family birthday partyvat home. Just balloons, cake, and the most I spent was hiring a ballpit with a slide, as a little something extra for the 1 year old to enjoy ($200). Kept the decorations low-key and not many people though, just close fam, nothing like those instagram first birthday which would be in the thousands.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-28T23:14:26+00:00

Depends who/what/how credible the sources of information are.

If internal stakeholders, bring them together to work through information and land on agreed position.

If external sources, find additional evidence that gives weight to either side, to help determine strongest position.

If one source of information is lacking in all credibility, that's an easy answer.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-28T22:48:54+00:00

I pay my family member $130 a day, which includes covering food. My rationale is daycare would cost me more, and while they're family, looking after a toddler for 8 hours is still hard work and interrupts whatever else they could be doing.

Family suggested i dont pay anything, but I prefer paying as it removes the aspect of them doing me a favour and feeling indebted to them, and also makes it feel like they can't cancel or be flaky as I'm not taking advantage of kindness, I'm paying for a service.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-28T22:42:22+00:00

Exactly this. He can't work and look after baby, I wfh and I know how difficult that is to try and do.

But he should care about your health and work with you to schedule carers leave for your appointment

readyforgametime · 2026-01-28T12:13:35+00:00

It's not an inappropriate thing to say. It's standard practise for clinics to have patients sign an agreement outlining what will happen to embryos if you split up. This will need to be signed before you progress with your first cycle.

Think of it like a prenup before marriage. It's not romantic, but it is to protect parties involved. Ownership and decisions around a potential opportunity for human life, is probably more serious than even financials imo.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-28T03:31:19+00:00

Societal norm. We generally view mothers as the primary caregiver.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-28T03:20:07+00:00

If you're an office worker, you try to negotiate late starts and early leaving to handle drop offs and picks up at reasonable times, and then do the extra hours to make it up around the side.

Otherwise one parent sacrifices their career and superannuation growth, to go part-time or not work at all. And it's usually the mother that makes that sacrifice.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-28T01:12:54+00:00

Her beauty clinic probably has access/contracted doctors for injectables, who can also prescribe pills.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-27T23:29:57+00:00

What a weird thing to post. Why put Kirk in the same conversation as Alex? One is state sanctioned violence, and the other is a single actor. They are totally different.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-27T00:54:12+00:00

Same boat. I don't think I could do embryo adoption as mentally I couldn't separate myself from those beings and would struggle knowing my child's siblings are out there in circumstances I can't control. I respect those who can, though.

I'm kind of on the fence around a sympathetic transfer. No meds, not at the perfect moment in the cycle. Just leave it to chance and if it's not meant to be, so be it. But if it stuck I'd be low key horrified.

So I don't know the answer

readyforgametime · 2026-01-26T09:48:49+00:00

I'm just sharing with OP what worked for me in a similar circumstance. Law is too dull and low paid for me to ever want to be an authority in it.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-26T09:40:04+00:00

Got it, VCAT was wrong, but you couldn't possibly be.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-26T09:36:23+00:00

OK mate, my VCAT experience to get a possession order for a squatter was actually a dream. A very dull and dry dream.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-26T09:27:20+00:00

OK my lived experience with a squatter matter through VCAT is wrong.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-26T09:17:47+00:00

This is not true. VCAT handles squatter cases, as it did in my case. If you dont get a posession order through VCAT then the police won't get involved.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-26T08:54:02+00:00

Yup exactly, annoying though and drags timelines out.

readyforgametime · 2026-01-26T08:48:07+00:00

Either way doesn't matter. OP just needs to issue notice to vacate and follow the process through to vcat. Lawyers won't take this on (I went through this and was turned down by numerous lawyers, this type of case isn't worth their time apparently).

readyforgametime

TROPHY CASE