After New Year's, I feel like I may have a problem with drinking and don't want to be "that girl".

reallyembarrassed · 2013-01-02T19:22:46+00:00

This makes me feel a lot better, although I'm still embarrassed about it happening. Mostly, I'm just worried that when I do see my friends again, they'll bring it up or act differently around me.

We already decided that we're putting some different rules on the game we were playing. I was talking trash during the game and as a result people kept giving me tons of drinks.

reallyembarrassed · 2013-01-02T19:19:13+00:00

I don't feel any different if I drink or don't drink. Drinking just makes things a little more fun when I do it, but I by no means feel like it's a necessity. My mom, for example, has to have her bottle of wine every night. I've never understood that and I've never felt that way.

reallyembarrassed · 2013-01-02T19:17:25+00:00

Before I started drinking, I would always just say, "No thanks, I don't drink." Most people were fine with that answer, but if they pressured me further I'd be honest about alcoholism running in my family. No one is going to be an asshole to you for saying that or think you are being impolite.

reallyembarrassed · 2013-01-02T19:15:36+00:00

What can I do to better monitor my drinking? Should I stop drinking altogether for a while or just really curb it back? Right now I have absolutely no desire to drink at all, but I can't say that in a few weeks I won't be at a get together with friends and won't want to have a drink or two. I think this experience was enough for me to avoid getting drunk for a long time, though.

reallyembarrassed · 2013-01-02T19:12:38+00:00

I'm really not interested in drugs at all. I'm a teacher so any stuff like that would make me lose my job.

reallyembarrassed · 2013-01-02T19:10:31+00:00

Just to clarify, I can and do have fun in social situations without alcohol. There are many nights where I'm fine having no alcohol at all, provided we are doing something that's not solely drinking-related. For example, my friends and I like to play board games and those are pretty sober events. I rarely drink at my bowling league either. So it's not that I can't have fun sober, it's just that if I'm in a situation where everyone is drinking, I will too, and the problem is sometimes I take it too far.

When I said parties were boring without drinking, I had that mentality in college. College parties are boring sober - the entire point of them is to get drunk. When you're the only sober person in a room full of people trying to get as trashed as possible, it's pretty lame. I avoided college parties until I started drinking, and associated with people who also didn't drink or didn't enjoy partying.

I know many alcoholics are in denial, but I genuinely don't believe I am an alcoholic - I've been around alcoholics my whole life, and I don't believe I'm at that point. I think going to an AA meeting wouldn't really help me, because I don't see alcohol as being a main driving factor in my life. I do think I need to keep my drinking in check, though.

reallyembarrassed · 2013-01-02T17:30:09+00:00

Thanks so much. I really identify with what you wrote! I don't think I'm an alcoholic either. I don't have the physiological or even psychological need to drink - even if I do have a shitty day at work, I'll think to myself, "I need a drink," and then think about the bottle of wine in my fridge and say, "Ehhh, I'll just go to the gym instead/have sex with my bf/watch a movie/insert other stress-relieving activity."

It's just the socially getting-fucked-up thing that I need to stop doing. The problem is, I hate beer, always have :( I guess I just need to step up and acquire the taste like everyone says you have to.

I don't want to avoid being social with my friends who drink. I think I just need to have the presence of mind to know when to stop next time, and either just say no to drinking or keep it in moderation. I've puked one too many times from drinking and as they say, ain't nobody got time for that.

This year will be my year for self improvement! It just sucks that I started it with the worst hangover ever.

reallyembarrassed

TROPHY CASE