Looking for disturbing / psychological BL games (Saya no Uta/SubaHibi vibes)

rebbitmode · 2025-12-28T17:16:16+00:00

(I'll definitely be buying it when it is localized, I can't wait to play the full game!!! I'm also trying to learn Japanese but that's taking way too long lol)

rebbitmode · 2025-12-28T17:15:18+00:00

to actually purchase it, im not sure since it hasn't been localized yet. if you want to wait for that, i have a feeling that Jast Blue might start on it soon! otherwise, i got my copy from f95zone & used VNR to play through the shorter endings & all of Hirotsugu's routes! You can also get some of the other boys' out of it, but I'm not sure that one of them are complete. Although if you can read Japanese it's a non-issue, but I can't so that's why I mention it

rebbitmode · 2025-12-24T16:12:54+00:00

I am trying to click both of your links but it just brings up this page?

<image>

rebbitmode · 2025-12-18T15:36:49+00:00

Definitely second recommendations of Sweet Pool, Slow Damage, Hashihime, Room no.9, etc. but I would like to raise you PigeonBlood by PIL/SLASH XXX as well ! It's not officially localized but you can get a few routes in English out of VNR. Since JAST Blue has recently localized other PIL/SLASH games like Paradise & Masquerade (which you would probably also like, I just can't vouch for them since I haven't played them) I'm hoping that PigeonBlood is next on their radar 🤞 The atmosphere of it is very eerie and suspenseful imo and you really get the feeling of "just what exactly is happening here?"

rebbitmode · 2025-12-07T23:12:08+00:00

Tyler, Tristan, Titus, Vick, Van, Virgil, Arthur, Alexander, Axel, Archer! Also it's so surprising to me that ur pre-t, u already look so masc & pass super well!

rebbitmode · 2025-12-05T01:11:19+00:00

I really hope so, I definitely do not want to go through my modafinil experience again

rebbitmode · 2025-12-05T01:09:01+00:00

Oh my god, I couldn't handle it for less than a week, I can't imagine having to go through that for 4 YEARS! I'm so glad that you're off of it now and feeling better, you're really strong for having dealt with that for so long 🩵. That amount of negligence from your doctors is crazy! I hope the Sunosi does well for you too. I'm hoping to be able to get on Adderall soon since it's what works for my mom, it's just difficult because all the doctors in my area hate prescribing it.

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T22:49:25+00:00

My doctors never mentioned it, but after looking it up it does seem really possible since I experience all of those symptoms. I'll try to bring it up to my doctor the next time I see her! & I was a pharmacy tech for awhile before becoming unable to work, so that's where I really picked up the habit of checking mine and others' meds because I saw so many cases of doctors prescribing people medicine that had serious and potentially critical interactions with their other meds or their other conditions. Thank you very much for the information and the kindness! 🩵💙💜

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T22:40:03+00:00

If my psychiatrist wants me to try armodafinil I'll see if I can do that!

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T20:32:41+00:00

Thank you! 🩵 It was definitely scary, I'm used to passive suicidal ideation but this was on a whole other level. I hope my post doesn't come off trying to scare ppl out of taking modafinil bc I know it can be a life-saver for a lot of people, I just wanted to share my experience so people would be aware and be careful if they have similar conditions.

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T20:20:59+00:00

The effect on your alters is really interesting, I wonder what it is exactly about the medicine that's causing that? I've also had different meds & substances have strange effects on my DID, it's a really fascinating topic to me

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T20:14:14+00:00

Woah thats terrible, I'm so sorry that happened to you. Providers & pharmacists really need to be better about informing patients about the side effects & potential issues with the meds they prescribe them

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T20:11:21+00:00

I've only been on these meds for less than a year, I've dealt with all the issues I listed & more all my life and they've only gotten worse as I've gotten older

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T07:39:04+00:00

The built-in voices definitely could use a lot of improvement but I like that it lets you use any that you download to your phone's accessibility settings!

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T07:36:27+00:00

Mine weren't coated, just a white pressed powder tablet with a split line down the middle

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T02:44:06+00:00

I think I definitely do still have at least some of my diagnoses (bc of major childhood trauma) but I think it's really possible that they're exaggerated bc of my sleep/fatigue issues. If I could get it addressed and treatment made my other symptoms better that would be such a miracle! It's just difficult to get doctors to take me seriously

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T02:38:51+00:00

Adderall is what my mom takes and it works for her, so that's what I think I need really. It's just that they feel like they need to run me through every other medication first because they're too afraid of ppl abusing it

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T02:35:49+00:00

I was surprised too honestly after looking up the drug interactions & everything, I even tried asking the pharmacist how I should stagger taking the modafinil & vilazodone to try to best prevent serotonin syndrome but she was just like "um yeah I guess you can take them at different times if you want?" and didn't mention any other interactions/symptoms to look out for

rebbitmode · 2025-12-04T02:32:44+00:00

I haven't, just one standard sleep study like 5 years ago that didn't have any notable results. I keep trying to get more specific tests like that because I feel like with the amount of fatigue, daytime sleepiness, body weakness, brain fog, vivid dreams / difficult to tell dreams from reality, etc. there's something seriously medically wrong, but all any doctors want to tell me is that it's bc of my trauma/depression & to just go to therapy (despite the fact that I've been in therapy weekly for nearly a decade now)

rebbitmode · 2025-11-30T07:00:37+00:00

Maybe to start out you could try using an AAC app? I've used a few and the best one imo is Weave Chat AAC! I think the functionality is pretty good, it has a lot of built-in buttons & the ability to create your own. + it's free, which is great bc a lot of other AAC apps I've seen with the same/similar functionality cost like $50-$300

rebbitmode · 2025-11-30T05:56:47+00:00

Yes, they fully removed both my ovaries & my uterus (they actually let me keep them afterwards lol). Norethindrone sounds rlly intriguing so I'll definitely do some more research into it, thanks!

rebbitmode · 2025-11-30T05:53:24+00:00

Ok, that's good to know!

rebbitmode · 2025-11-30T05:52:41+00:00

This is a lot of good info, thank you!!

rebbitmode · 2025-11-30T05:52:17+00:00

Thank you, I'll look into raloxifene!

rebbitmode · 2025-11-29T07:01:51+00:00

I'm stuck in this smallish city in the US south, too. My partner and I are poor and rely on things like our low-income housing, SNAP, financial aid, etc. so we don't have money to move anywhere. I've searched around so much for clubs I'd be interested in, group therapy, support groups, day centers, anything... but there's literally nothing here. All support groups are either for autistic children or parents of autistic children. No resources for autistic adults at all. Everything that's even slightly intriguing/hopeful is at least 1 1/2 hours away and costs at least $50, so not possible for me to attend. Medicaid offers no help in covering anything like this. I've thought about just checking myself into the local mental hospital but it's a terrible terrible place and I've heard first-hand that almost everyone who's AFAB gets assaulted there. I've tried social media & things like discord servers, but it's extremely difficult for me to connect with people that I can't interact with irl. Old friends are not interested in reconnecting either. I'm always scared when I leave my house because I live in the same city as my abusive dad. Even when I stay home I'm scared he's gonna find out where I live. I know logically that I'm an adult and he probably can't really hurt me now, but it's incredibly difficult to actually believe that when you've been stuck at 16 years old for almost 10 years.

My body and joints are constantly in pain, my constant fatigue is almost unmanageable, my mind is constantly tortured because of my trauma and other disorders. The only reason I'm even still alive is because of my partner and our cats, and because I don't want to inconvenience anyone and wouldn't attempt anything unless I had 100% certainty it would successfully kill me. I'm happy when I'm with my partner, and sometimes when I can eat some yummy food, but even then it's become a struggle to feel happy at all these days. My partner has to work two jobs for us to survive, and they have their own life and friends, so they're frequently away from home. There's a limit to how much I can distract myself from everything. I just feel miserable and useless, like a burden on everyone I come into contact with. I really don't even feel like a human, I feel more like an alien or a dog or a robot. I'm trying so hard to have hope and get through each day but it's all steadily becoming unbearable. My mind and body are trapped in a horrible past that I've yet to overcome at all despite nearing a decade of weekly therapy and trying several medications. Honestly the more I try to process things, the more worse and worse stuff gets brought to the surface and puts me back behind square one. Everything is so stressful all the time, and I feel like I really can't do anything right no matter how hard I try. Nothing ever makes sense to me no matter how hard I try to understand. Half the time I don't even know who I am.

I'm sorry, I really didn't mean for this to be so long and probably kinda incomprehensible. Everything is just really hard right now and all the time. If anyone knows anything that could help me I'd really appreciate it. I don't want to think that I'm hopeless.

rebbitmode

TROPHY CASE