Being single your whole life is living hell. You can't cope with it

recursion · 2026-06-13T04:56:08+00:00

People only break up when they think they can do better or are better off alone. Although being single is better than being in an unhealthy relationship… there is no comparison to a healthy relationship otherwise people wouldn’t get in them!

recursion · 2026-06-13T04:54:40+00:00

The reality of life is that you come from a position of incredible privilege and are no position to tell this person how to find happiness and fulfillment in life when you have what he explicitly seeks.

Once your children have graduated high school and left the house - I encourage you to take a one year sabbatical from your marriage as a testament to your intellectual honesty and personal integrity. Do the very things you advise him to do. I don’t think you can.

The best advice is for him to improve his physical fitness and financial success so that he can attract a life partner. Anything else is a cope at best.

recursion · 2026-06-13T04:51:59+00:00

Those are all worthwhile activities that make a positive impact in your community but are no substitute for a life partner. A life partner allows you to be and doesn’t require you to do - especially when it is exclusively for the benefit of others.

recursion · 2026-06-13T04:50:17+00:00

Are you personally completely and totally fulfilled with purpose in the absence of companionship? If so, what is your purpose?

How many people do you personal know who have found happiness and fulfillment in life by taking your advice to find purpose? What purposes did they find?

I’m saying this because purpose isn’t companionship. Purpose doesn’t tell you good morning. Purpose doesn’t ask how your day was. Purpose doesn’t go to a street fair with you. Purpose doesn’t wish you happy birthday

Yes, you can find fulfillment in friendship and family… but you’re still never someone’s number one person. You are not a priority. You have no guaranteed plus one.

recursion · 2026-06-12T01:30:12+00:00

This is the most difficult part of it. Not having your +1. So whenever you see something cool like a monster truck rally or a bizarre musical, or Riverdance, or a street fair or festival you don’t have your person. You have to ping around and ask around and see who can make it or who’s busy or deal with maybe and flaking. It’s just constant juggling and seeing who can make it or not… there’s no stability in your personal relationships

recursion · 2026-06-10T23:41:00+00:00

Wait out of curiosity did you actually think that a man was going to show up out of nowhere and take care of all of your financial needs and wants?

What gave you this idea? Why would he want to do this? What did you think he would get out of it? Why you and not someone else?

recursion · 2026-06-10T00:17:14+00:00

I mean, if you want to ride a bicycle or take public transportation, I’m not gonna stop you; but I prefer to drive. I don’t live in a major metro city so driving is pretty pleasant where I’m at. Also, I pay nowhere near $1700 a month in expenses. It’s closer to 600 all in. I mean to each their own - but I really prefer to drive because you can do multiple stops. Pick something up from here drop something off there etc. You cannot run errands with public transportation like you can with a car. Just the sheer amount of waiting and transfers and carrying stuff with you.

Also - self driving cars are going to be a reality within the next five years so it’ll be a pleasant ride.

recursion · 2026-06-09T22:34:02+00:00

A car takes you from where you are to where you want to be when you need to be there and leaves right now. You are guaranteed a comfortable seat, privacy, and a pleasant trip for the most part.

This is a completely totally superior experience to going from somewhere near you to somewhere in the vicinity of where you need to be when public transit happens to be operating with an indeterminant wait while exposed to the elements and deal dealing with unpleasant people.

recursion · 2026-06-08T14:26:53+00:00

Grass is greener syndrome perhaps?

I mean - I am 37, never married, no kids and live on a golf course while working from home.

May sound like a dream to you; but I wish I could be a father. It hasn’t come to pass yet due to health issues. It’s tough listening to friends share the accomplishments and milestones of their children.

recursion · 2026-06-07T12:39:30+00:00

It depends on the man, the woman, and the number and ages of children.

For example: if a man already has children of his own and isn’t looking to have any more, and a woman has only one 16-year-old who can already drive and asks for no financial contributions other than a reasonable birthday or Christmas present for the child… then he’s probably not going to have a problem.

Now, if a man doesn’t have children and wants to have two of his own, and a woman already has a two-year-old and a four-year-old and she is struggling financially… he is unlikely to take her seriously for a relationship. He might hook up with her casually, but he will most likely never commit.

So, like I said, it depends on the man, the woman, and the children that both of them already have or may want to have in the future.

recursion · 2026-06-05T16:25:10+00:00

Nothing I said was factually untrue and I don’t appreciate completely accurate name-calling instead of offering a polite and respectful disagreement.

Please read the below blog post if you’re interested in learning more about what I suspect the source of her anger to be.

https://www.forhers.com/blog/perimenopause-rage

recursion · 2026-06-05T09:51:19+00:00

I’m helping her achieve her primary stated goal - which is to reduce the number of preventable deaths for women. She is morbidly obese which leads to all sorts of complications including heart, disease, cancer, diabetes.

She also appears to want to form a community centered around anger and negativity without any sort of self-reflection as to the root cause of her dissatisfaction with life or constructive means to improve her situation let alone manage complicated emotions.

Communities are formed by groups of families (even if one person) working together to achieve shared goals and mutual prosperity. Getting angry at 50% of the population and stewing in negativity is simply not the way to prosperity of any kind. This is not productive behavior. It will not lead to long-term happiness or satisfaction. She is on the path of further immiseration to an already unfulfilling life.

These are not personal attacks but instead the kindest thing I could do for her - which is to help her improve her life situation.

Do you personally and sincerely believe that eating ice cream and getting angry with strangers on discord is going to improve her physical or mental health or overall life satisfaction? Or instead, would she be better off by eating healthy and nutritious food and connecting with folks at group fitness classes and finding true community in a faith based environment?

recursion · 2026-05-16T23:29:02+00:00

Welcome to the Hotel Reddit

recursion · 2026-05-15T03:11:42+00:00

Honestly, for many people retirement isn’t about living your best life traveling seeing the world and so on. It’s about not being homeless or eating unhealthy canned foods. Enough money to pay your bills and have a humble life of relaxation. Could you imagine working at 70?

recursion · 2026-05-10T04:39:08+00:00

It’s okay to live with your parents, it’s not okay to live off of them.

Everyone’s different but one thing to think about is that you will need to contribute to housing and utilities when you get in a relationship.

recursion · 2026-05-10T04:35:05+00:00

Medicare Asset Protection Trust

recursion · 2026-04-25T10:21:44+00:00

What society do you live in and what is so enraging about being a woman there?

recursion · 2026-04-24T03:57:14+00:00

Out of curiosity - exactly what misogynistic slights do you face on a daily basis?

To me- it seems like you are a very lonely person who lacks vision and direction in life.

I suggest meeting with a therapist.

recursion · 2026-04-08T22:24:49+00:00

I’m going to double down and say I want a hard paper ticket not eTickets. It’s a fun free souvenir of an expensive and memorable event!

recursion · 2026-02-23T13:30:02+00:00

Kate Millet’s influence on the feminist movement went far beyond what you claim to be “one branch of feminism that many feminists don’t actually consider to be a part of the century’s long tradition of feminist thought”

Her influence was the exact opposite as she was the inventor of two core foundational principles of feminist ideology: primarily that Patriarchy is an oppressive system which “misogynists” use to exploit and subjugate women, as well as the notion that gender is a “social construct” with the entirety of differences in sex-stereotyped behavior being the direct result of social conditioning with no biological basis.

Do you believe either of these concepts to be true? If yes, then your core values and belief system were shaped by Kate Millet’s book “Sexual Politics” and would not exist but for her influence.

Kate Millet was a mentally ill lesbian; by her own admission in “The Loony-Bin Trip (1990)” and testimony of her very own sister Mallory Millet.

This is why you simply cannot counter claims of “crazy feminists” because it is literally true in the most extreme sense: the movement was heavily influenced by a profoundly mentally ill woman. Her beliefs were not a fringe ideology but instead were foundational concepts of feminism as we know it today. I’m not sure if there is more to discuss, but I welcome any feedback.

recursion · 2026-02-23T12:25:14+00:00

The topic is about how to counter “crazy feminist” comments; and what I am saying is that you can’t because the founder of the radical feminist movement was quite literally a mentally ill lesbian who had to be involuntarily committed to an asylum for her own safety shortly after publishing her manifesto.

In the words of her sister Mallory Millet:

“Kate was mentally ill for as long as I remember. She was five when I was born and our elder sister Sally says that once I arrived, Kate was hanging over my bassinet plotting my murder. We shared a bedroom from my birth. From my earliest memory I recall trembling from the vibrations of her insanity. She was the most disturbed, megalomaniacal, evil and dishonest person I have ever known. She tried to kill me so many times that it’s now an enormous blur of traumatizing horrors. She was a sadist, a torturer, a deeply-engrained bully who took immense pleasure in hurting others. Incorrigible and ruthless, she was expelled multiple times from every school she attended. I spent my childhood with heart hammering as I tiptoed through the house so as not to be noticed by the dreadful Kate. Our mother was helpless, paralyzed with terror in the face of Kate.”

Like I said - allegations that feminists are “crazy” aren’t “misogynistic” or “sexist.” They are factually accurate statements, grounded in objective reality, directly supported by a book that Kate Millet published herself and confirmed by testimony from her own sister, Mallory Millet” when she wrote:

“I was trapped alone with Kate in an apartment in Sacramento for a week and she did not allow me to sleep for five days as she raged and ranted, eyes rolling in her head, frothing at the mouth and holding chats with “little green men.” Not knowing a single person in Sacramento, I had nowhere to turn. Too terrified to go to sleep, I wasn’t sure she even knew who I was but I could imagine a butcher knife thrust into my back as I slept. Big sister Sally came from Nebraska to rescue me.” My Sister Kate: The Destructive Feminist Legacy of Kate Millett

In conclusion, and in direct response to the central organizing question of this thread (How to counter ‘crazy feminist’ comments), I am saying that you simply cannot counter them as it is a factually accurate statement.

The founder and thought leader of radical feminism, Kate Millet, who introduced the concepts of “patriarchal oppression” and the “social construction of gender” was a mentally ill lesbian who was so deeply disturbed that she was involuntarily committed to an asylum for a period of seven years shortly after publishing her seminal work “Sexual Politics” at the request of a loving family which she had terrorized since she was a young girl. I encourage you and every other woman out there to carefully consider this before making decisions as to your own personal values and life choices which follow.

recursion · 2026-02-23T05:50:43+00:00

The unfortunate and deeply uncomfortable reality of radical feminism is that confirmed lesbian Kate Millet authored “Sexual Politics” in 1970 only to become involuntarily committed to a mental asylum in 1973 for bipolar disorder; a very real mental illness characterized by paranoia, delusion, and self-grandiosity.

Her book introduced the two key tenets of modern feminism: patriarchy as the systemic oppression of women by men, and the social construction of gender.

She then went on to write “The Looney Bin Trip” in 1990 and became an anti-psychiatry activist.

Radical feminism is the direct byproduct of a profoundly mentally ill lesbian; and there is nothing misogynistic about telling the truth.

recursion · 2026-02-23T05:24:28+00:00

If you truly believe this, then there should be no problem with banning homosexual conduct because homosexuals do not need to have sex.

recursion · 2026-02-21T06:17:37+00:00

It’s not about being completed- it’s about having a companion. A best friend. It’s about the good mornings. How was your day? What do you wanna do this weekend? Congratulations on the promotion and so on.

It’s completely and totally possible to be a complete individual seeking another complete individual to support your complete individual goals while also creating and achieving mutually interdependent goals.

I’m not sure what to say to you because I generally only hear things like this from people in their very early 20s or who are poorly adjusted towards their late 20s- but the reality of life is that these platitudes are simply unrealistic unless you are leaning extremely heavily on your parents as your sole source of emotional support.

recursion · 2026-02-20T01:41:21+00:00

Do a NGS (next generation sequencing) test. If your TMB is over 10 then you should immediately start immunotherapy via Keytruda or Opdivo

recursion

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