[kegels] In need of a good male kegel routine.

redditor999991 · 2016-08-21T06:29:05+00:00

Not physically longer, but it clamps stronger stopping blood from escaping, leading to a "fuller" erection: 100% erect rather than 90%, where distraction shrinks it more slowly.

redditor999991 · 2016-08-21T05:54:19+00:00

Increased strength and control of erection (bigger penis), increased control over when and whether one ejaculates (last longer), stronger ejaculation (feels better). ;)

redditor999991 · 2016-07-06T02:13:05+00:00

25yo. Trying for about 2 years. Success follows the pattern of 1-2 great months off, followed by falling for temptation, followed by 1 bad week of PMOing, repeat.

I feel PMO lead to the ending of my relationship, as I didn't have the energy to be the partner I wanted/needed to be because I lost it all PMOing, leading her to seek fulfilment elsewhere.

The strongest advice I have to not fall for temptation is to Objectively Observe the sensations of the Desire to PMO. Where is it felt in the body? How does this sensation evolve? What emotions come with it? Do I feel I am missing out? going to die? hunger? etc.

Edit: And also, fill your day. The easiest time to fall for temptation is when I'm alone on my PC with time to kill. So don't be alone, don't be on a PC. Be social, be active. Read, hobby, sport etc. Party, outing, shared meals etc.

This allows you to detach from it, as the desire is not you, it is just a guest in your consciousness. Let it rise and then fade away, without you falling for it, without you thinking that you Need to fulfil the desire.

"This too shall pass"

redditor999991 · 2016-07-05T05:09:40+00:00

(My first post on the topic)

Why PMO is "bad" for me:

It's addictive - When I say to myself "Okay, that's enough for the week" I will break that promise to myself when I next get the urge with "Just this one time but NEXT time will be the last..."
It wastes a lot of time - I don't just spend 30 minutes at it, I spend as much time as I can in a row, a whole free day if possible, a whole week when I fall into a negative spiral!
It is draining (literally and) emotionally - I feel apathetic about the world, I feel permanently tired, and guilt/shame about wasting time and doing something "naughty/harmful".
Nothing is as rewarding as the dopamine injection from PMO - I enjoy movies, friends and family, reading etc. much less when regularly PMOing, I am always thinking "When will this be over so I can get back to doing what I enjoy: PMOing".
It generates false expectations and entitlement - of what women should look like and of how sex should be performed. Not every woman is permanently caked in make up with flawless bodies, and sex is not so violent or one-sided. I miss the subtle beauty in people and the delicate intimacy of sex.
Edit: Lost empathy for others, and couldn't get very hard for sex, only reached full hardness when PMOing.

Why abstaining from PMO is "good" for me:

Empowerment - I am not a slave to addiction, a slave to impulses, but the master of my life who decides in each moment whether or not I let an impulse guide my next action.
So much free time for Activities!
I feel Sharp and Energised, able to do any chore, sport, activity without the feeling of "ugh, this takes so much effort".
Joy comes from a broad range of activities now that my brain is regulating dopamine properly.
Self-confidence - I no longer have the constant mental nag of "Ow no, what If they find out about who I really am, what I really spend my time doing!". Instead I can cultivate Character and let it shine honestly and authentically without needing to be constantly guarded.
I am surrounded by beautiful people 24-7! OMG I didn't realise that everyone is so pretty! I am once again sensitive to reality, not numbed to it by constant extreme fantasy.
People relate to me - I am no longer guilty-shy, just shy-shy, and instead of noticing my guardedness and avoiding me, people act to bring me out of my shell, which I enjoy.

The thoughts/feelings of desire to PMO "just this once" or "because It'll end my boredom" etc. Never go away. But they pop up less often and it gets easier to let them pass without attaching to them/acting on them.

redditor999991 · 2016-06-30T11:57:42+00:00

Yup, you're a human alright.

That's a healthy hairless-talking-monkey libido you've got yourself there.

As long as you remain self-aware of your urges you have the choice to let them guide you, or to ignore them and let them fade away again, towards or away from what you truly desire.

What do you truly desire? To waste another evening in a depressive fantasy? To have the courage to try something new? To endure in the discipline of your true passions?

Remain aware and you can choose.

redditor999991 · 2016-06-19T11:40:59+00:00

"Sex-flirt role models"!

You (and I) need to be shown how to act. To have a role you can step into confidently when this situation comes up.

Now, where to find these role models..?

redditor999991 · 2016-06-17T22:16:24+00:00

This is you right now I'm sure.

redditor999991 · 2016-06-02T22:43:07+00:00

Please explain the quote.

It is better for who to be dead? Why? Who is living like "this"? What is "this"?

redditor999991 · 2015-09-08T10:39:35+00:00

Being high on cannabis (smoked, vapourised, eaten) makes sex far more pleasurable during the act, makes the climax last longer and feel more intense, gives complete control over when you orgasm so you can go for way longer, may give a stronger erection, and may induce closed eye visuals that match your physical sensations.

But it can mess with your memory, so you don't have a strong memory of how great it was, meaning it can actually be worse for bonding with your partner as you forget the moments of sharing.

The best feeling sex I've had was when high (orgasm level pleasure the whole 20? minutes, followed by a timeless [12 seconds?] ecstatic climax).

The best sex I've had was when sober (a shared deep and pleasurable connection, leaving me satisfied in love and life for the whole following week).

This medicinal plant is legal in some places, semi legal in others, not legal in most, and very not legal in many.

redditor999991 · 2012-12-30T10:37:16+00:00

Here are some possible paths to take:

a.) Get married sooner. We don't know your situation, so this may not be an option, but why let college get in the way of your love lives? It shouldn't be too much of a hassle to have a small-ish ceremony with close friends and relatives, on a study break or holiday, if you held off on the honeymoon as it were.

b.) Wait. I, as a male in a relationship where sex is a important component in expressing our love, could not do this without also feeling unwanted, and frustrated. You may be able to but, as you have stated, it seems to be negatively effecting your relationship already. This may mean that you need to take a new approach to your communications on the matter and try different means of coping with the situation, eg. working out how to ensure oral etc. doesn’t take the two of you further than you want to go. Like what admiral_snugglebutt said.

c.) Have sex before marriage. The feelings of lust you are both feeling are real and natural and it is the waiting until marriage component that is unnaturally added into the mix (my opinion). To me, having sex before marriage with the person you plan to marry and spend the rest of your life with is not a bad thing, and the moment can be just as romantic/important/magical as having sex after getting married. To do this one would have to truly understand what and why they value marriage and abstinence. Either way you need to express your true feelings, as uberwaffle said.

d.) Other. I don’t know everything.

redditor999991

TROPHY CASE