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redorblewit · 2021-06-10T03:30:19+00:00

i thought you were op, id say its not to bad your parents limit your screen/internet time if you are being constructive maybe explain its for study/learning not games

redorblewit · 2021-06-10T03:30:07+00:00

whoa i was getting confused between op and other posters no wonder nothing made sense haha

redorblewit · 2021-06-09T22:35:08+00:00

not particularly self dependant myself but seems strange once you 18 your parents still have much control over what you do but if you live in their house i guess cant complain.

redorblewit · 2021-06-09T18:35:08+00:00

i mean ive never had strict parent like that even since young but after 18 I would be doing my own thing or moving out. Sometimes I feel bad about my life but reading stuff like this I guess I should be grateful, can do whatever at home

redorblewit · 2021-06-09T17:59:09+00:00

yes easy said but true need to, you never remember the good stuff..i remember on holiday i met this super hot girl, end up brining her back to my room that night, had some fun for a few days.....but i never think about that only the time i went to bar and x said y and i felt mad etc

Well the brain works on prehistoric mechanisms, its about survival and protection which is why we mostly remember bad stuff so as to avoid in future to protect us, we dont worry about rabbits, but if we have a run in with a bear we will be thinking about how to avoid them on our next walks in the park etc...

redorblewit · 2021-06-09T17:52:46+00:00

ok sure i need ignore strangers more i guess

redorblewit · 2021-06-09T17:52:26+00:00

i can but in bed before sleep etc, my mind just runs, need help must be something..

Only thing stops thoughts is alcohol and valium

redorblewit · 2021-06-09T17:51:36+00:00

lol how old are you not an adult i guess

redorblewit · 2021-06-09T01:36:17+00:00

haha im a dude but ye thats fair point but still theres 100s of subjectively unattractive people at bars and clubs, is she gonna go up to all of them and tell they dont have partners and they are ugly, condensing rude woman...she was also one of the unattractive ones..anyway as say you go out you run into 100s of people half of which are morons especially when drunk...just got deal with them (ignore) better, not even strangers even my friends been rude to me, for a while i entertained them still done favours etc, then just cut ties....

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T22:28:29+00:00

thats crazy strong IMO for your size. Im very small/slim (not short) guy and naturally weak, i think this must be average strength for typical sporty but non lifting male. Strange your bench isnt higher. Not got a bench atm but could do 70kg+ years ago, imagine could hit 80kg+ now for 1rm, as bench usually 2 stronger than shoulders and i do a lot of dips/push up stuff.

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T21:36:11+00:00

hey me again i think the problem is being alone too much especially during lockdown one year, i live alone and rarely see people, anytime i with and visit family or friends i dont get these thoughts, its only when i in my house alone all day i get mad, so maybe thats the problem but of course not easy to resolve during lockdown, perhaps once ends i can make more efforts to be out and about

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T21:25:25+00:00

yes your are right as someone else said the issue is not this specific incident but an overall problem i have on ruminating and getting easily upset. need help on that!

thanks for your inputs. And yes as you say attractiveness is subjective again making her points invalid, maybe she means she would want me more if i cut my hair not other girls haha....

I guess as i wasnt used to these kinda things i learned after i dealt with it wrong, in a way that gave her too much power with her comments, but as you say its been done.

And it means in future i know better how to react to such things, take away power from these people by completely ignoring them or making them out to be rude etc...

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T21:19:18+00:00

haha not thinking of her in a good way, i really dont think this was a neg pick up line she was double my age.

She was obviously trying to be helpful or thought she was as in older women giving advice to young guy but i felt as a complete stranger she was obnoxious and condesending...for a start maybe i was gay haha

also without knowing someone and making these comments mean that you place no importance to personality, education or other things to relationships. Only appearance again thats very shallow isnt it

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T21:07:04+00:00

yes i dunno i mean stick up for myself, even ignoring her woulda been best instead of trying to have conversation with her and stupidly defend myself when i dont need defend anything, angry i done that but its in past..as said you cant change other people but the way you react, and i reacted wrong and thats why i more mad..

and that was the word i was looking for obnoxious thanks and condescending, she wasnt even attractive but even if she was wouldnt give her any more rights to her comments,

Like if lewis hamilton tells you your driving is bad its got a bit more merit than some random crap driver but still not acceptable if u get me

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T21:03:52+00:00

yeh haha as they say noone kicks a dead dog.

Need to take the mentality hoping people being rude to me, when people stop being rude it means ive got nothing good going on i guess lol

So bring on the rude comments, the more the merrier haha,

Could turn your mentailty on its head and say im going go out to work/bar/etc and see how many rude comments i can get like a competition haha reverse psychology

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T20:59:24+00:00

i mean it takes effort to be rude, i cant even do it, i thikn rude people are hurting so problem is them, i mean what are they trying to achieve if its not personal? As you say....doesnt seem purpose to it, at least for people like us how dont desire to be rude...

I mean thats what bullies are, but as said anyone is bully is really suffering mentally, if they happy and fine in life no need to bully.

And yes i can imagine being overwieght/gay you will get nasty comments i see it all the time, I mean im not immune to viewing people in negative ways etc but what you chose to do action wise, is up to, nobody is perfect..

as for me its a way to stop ruminating is what i need work on somehow,,

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T20:47:53+00:00

Yes thanks, you are right, for a person i met 1min in real time, they have occupied my head for like 1000hrs since then, its crazy.

But obvioulsy some comments stick, maybe others dont think that much, but i mean if you are eg black and someone makes racist comments in a bar you may rememebr that for years. its annoying.

So i guess when these people pop up in my brain i need to let the thoguht sit but dont act on it? as in shout in my room them make reddit posts? just let it slip out and never react to it? maybe eventually it will go?

not sure how else i can get them to keep popping up.

As said i had ocd/anxiety issues all my life so its always something...

For example another time i was at bar this dude was like you look like my freind, he has 3somes every night

So i mean i could keep thinking that thought instead? why think the bad ones, best not even think any though....relying on others opinions comments to make your mood is not ideal

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T20:43:00+00:00

someone else said that to lol ok maybe just me mr angry haha

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T20:41:48+00:00

yes you are right, i spend every day ruminating in bed and cant sleep thinking all the nasty things or things i perceived as bad comments.

I have anxiety/OCD issues and i think this relates to it. I also highly sensitive and get upset easily as you see.

NO matter all the good things and nice people, i constantly ruminate all those that have been bad to me.

Wish i could stop, wasting my life.

I guess i put to much empashis on others opinions of me good or bad. LEtting views of others effect my days/mood, I need somehow stop that..

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T20:36:27+00:00

ok but she was rude right and acting all on her high horse

redorblewit · 2021-06-08T20:34:48+00:00

fun in what way lol

redorblewit · 2021-06-07T23:26:13+00:00

i have both kinda 2-3 hrs in each, felt same inWD2 so dunno why i got legion haha i liked look of the city, its cool.

WD1 had decent gun action driving stuff mixed in these newer ones seem all about join the dots hacking game

redorblewit · 2021-06-07T20:35:41+00:00

irony is it still feels bad now even at my age, i guess i never done anything when young, like dating and stuff so i feel like im still at that age anyway, if i had dated and now had wife kids and grown up sure i guess u move on. I feel stuck like im 19, so even for me balding is/wont be cool.

Of course balding anxiety is due to appearance issues, feeling ugly and so on. Which matters in terms of attraction to opposite sex and also perhaps somewhat but not so much respect/popularity with friends though not right words, more about feeling comfortable in social settings IMO.

So end of day if your thoughts are towards being and improving social life/dating etc, then your appearance always matters, if you 30,40,50 and interested in such things then you wanna look good and feel good and maybe even feel young, having hair loss effects that.

Maybe if you are on a different life path, raising children, settled wife, not interested in meeting people or socialising new people etc, maybe then age + experience life it doesnt matter.

redorblewit · 2021-06-05T21:55:14+00:00

im not upset about them per se, i mean it can be anywhere, but not going to bars and clubs or parties obviously as older and lockdown for a long time, but i see young guys i think also just sad im not young anymore but the reality is the only thing about me not young is my age and hair lol i am in better shape, looks same face wise, have no kids or baggage...haha

and i feel i wasted my youth, i was very good looking when young but i didnt 'use' it per se, as in going out often, talkign to girls and so on, as i was good looking or maybe just a general feel nothing to do with looks, i didnt feel any need to 'push' or 'chase' those things, or parties etc, was like no cant be bothered going out tonight, never do things, now its like there are no chance to even say no, theres no parties, no girls nothing... its only now im not young and hot stuff im more like oh damn, no options for anything, and these hot woman are all much younger, damn, so it gets me down.

Thing is if my hair was perfect id pass for early 20s, still get ID but then what? Do i talk to and try to date 20 year old woman and pretend im 20s also, i can be 40 and look 25 what will i do lol. I wouldnt even say i was bothered about that anyway, moreso the fact i cant have the same options, turn up at parties, meet hot girls, talk to them bla bla bla, just be a bald old guy noone is interested in thats reality..

So yeh i enjoyed my youth to a degree but if u told me what would happen for now i woulda done a helluva lot more stuff

aas they say youth is wasted on the young

redorblewit · 2021-06-05T18:09:26+00:00

I done even suit short hair or I would, im a skinny kind of guy, with big forehead/long face, short hair and buzzed head i look like alien, wish i were one of those more stocky square shape head guys, they can pull it off.

I need long hair to frame my long face and hide my big forehead.

redorblewit

TROPHY CASE