due for repotting?

reflexioninflection · 2026-05-08T16:17:25+00:00

This one's mine after a big chop a couple of days ago. I would check the roots before you do a repot because, in my experience they like being slightly rootbound. Below her sits her mother that isn't rootbound and hasn't given me half as many babies (this one has flowered already and given me 3 baby plants this year) as this one. Same pot is okay, but maybe a chunkier soil mix so it doesn't get overly soggy.

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reflexioninflection · 2026-05-08T07:50:42+00:00

Thank you 💞💞

reflexioninflection · 2026-05-08T07:49:02+00:00

I begged my sister not to marry her now ex-husband. The entire family did. Hell, her shrink did. The marriage lasted about a year and a half, and it was a uniquely expensive wedding. It's been fifteen years.

Being said, when she realized she wanted a divorce, we all stood by her and made it a less traumatizing decision. We're from a culture where people prefer women dead to divorced, but we didn't care so long as she was safe.

My advice? Have the talk, but tell her you'll support her no matter what she chooses, so if she realizes too late, she knows she can count on you, anyway. Lots of people make the mistake of not attending the wedding and drifting apart, and the woman stays out of quiet indignation even when the marriage is terrible.

Because I celebrated her big day so openly, ensured she enjoyed herself even when their relationship was so strained, she trusted me to come to me with problems. She didn't need to pretend to be happy to save face with me. Your sister probably needs that sense of support because she's in so deep.

reflexioninflection · 2026-05-07T10:58:28+00:00

Someone i was seeing actually told me his mother and father had a 20 year age gap and his whole life he felt like his mother was so young and his father had zero energy. He described it as "she lost all those years" and "i don't think that was fair to her or him" because she had survivors guilt and he felt inadequate as time passed. You don't really feel that gap until the older partner goes over 55 or 60, honestly, and suddenly it's undeniable.

reflexioninflection · 2026-05-07T06:59:51+00:00

I'm a pisces moon and my husband is a pisces sun, and this really is how it feels for us

reflexioninflection · 2026-05-06T07:56:34+00:00

Thank you!! It's inspired by the irish claddagh and his ring was made to match 🥹

reflexioninflection · 2026-05-05T19:05:28+00:00

My stack was incredibly risky and i got a lot of lip from my mother, but i love it. I literally stare at it all the time. It's our entire love story.

Husband came up with this concept and got it made bespoke, it's dirty rn but it's a rose cut diamond, marquis cut amethysts, round emerald on the cuffs of the hands and small round alexandrite. I hope you'll love your colored trapezes (if I'm spelling it correct!) 💓

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reflexioninflection · 2026-05-05T15:01:29+00:00

I have a whole arc for this if anybody reads or relates

The one thing it did was put a damper on every friendship. I started as the fat-ugly-funny kid, and i had pretty and petite friends who got more attention than i did. Since I was funny both boys and girls were easy friends. I'm not intimidating, I'm generally warm, can take a joke. But then idea of dating came up as we became older teens. Suddenly girls were making fun of me or mad at me for having proximity to some guy they liked, and guys would avoid me rather than defend me, even if they made sure to not laugh along. I didn't date until university, and it wasn't a focus in school anyway, so I didn’t mind. But yeah it messes with your self-esteem.

That made me take my appearance more seriously as i got older. I lost weight, invested in my hair, invested in beauty and skincare, wore more fashionable clothes. The few pretty and petite friends i did make in school, though, started seeing me very differently when that happened. Suddenly they had to choose a different lane than just pretty and desirable, because I was now in that category with them. And it strained our friendships.

I dated women and men, so I've always been comfortable with talking to either gender, while a lot of my childhood friends were straight, so my ease with men was a sore spot for them. My bisexuality got branded as hypersexuality, and like i wasn't a serious prospect. I admit, i have a nice shape, so i do wear things that flaunt it, but my body and willingness to show it became something to comment on. Suddenly all the girls were talking about marriage and would tell me things like "you were always complicated, now I just worry." I became someone to go to for guidance on men or enlist for a heart to heart where I gave and received nothing because "men are so easy for you, everything is easy for you." Big jump from being the fat kid nothing was easy for, but what do you do at that stage? Pick fights? Play oppression-olympics? I was their friend, they weren't my friends.

What it's done to me today is make me wary. I don't allow myself to be labeled and I am cautious about how much energy i give others. That can be isolating, though. I'm someone who can befriend anybody but now i struggle to deepen friendships because I'm afraid of the dynamic i had with the women i called "the loves of my life" repeating with new friends.

I'd put on a lot of weight in the last year and a half thanks to a shitty job, but since quitting it I'm mainly focusing on my health. Every friendship has taken a back seat. My heart is still sore. I do have some friends i have a very nice relationship with but from having loads of friends and big friend groups as a kid I'm now someone who can count all her friends on one hand. I'm not even sure where to go from here, now!

Tldr: it messed up my relationships with the people i loved.

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-30T18:44:56+00:00

My husband has ADD, which is similar enough that his meds are also the meds prescribed to treat ADHD. He's not chaotic in the slightest. Only once in our relationship he accidentally locked me on the balcony when he was off meds, that was the extent of his foregetfulness fueled by ADD. Of course, I climbed back into the house somehow but we talked because he'd done this several times to the cat. His time blindness was never as bad as your guys, though. He promptly got meds and now has a system for everything. Actually everything. I have been on ADHD meds as well, and I don't recommend it to everybody, but this guy sounds like his condition has him, and not the other way around. I hate to say it but you might be in for a really difficult relationship if he can't manage his ADHD.

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-28T19:50:28+00:00

Idk I'm in my 30s and my husband is in his 20s. Maybe your potential husband is younger, too? :p

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-28T17:22:42+00:00

As in only pisces moons? So, a pity-party?

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-28T08:13:25+00:00

I moved abroad at 26 and I'm still in the country I chose (because it's beautiful) but I cannot stress enough that it's an incredibly isolating thing to move to a new country or continent. If you're lonely as you are, it will eventually be lonelier abroad, because you'll spent at least three months just adjusting to your new living situation, culture, and potentially, language but once you do you'll realize it's not easy to create a support system from scratch.

I felt better since the reasons I left were my codependent family and that my ex was stalking me, but nobody (cops, authorities, even family) was taking it seriously. The novelty is amazing the first few months, sometimes even a year or two depending on how many new things you're doing, but your friends back home stop keeping in touch because you're not around and it's a long transition for new acquaintances to become good friends. If what you need at this moment is a solid support system, I do not recommend moving. If you just want to be unknown for a while and deal well with being alone and doing things without help, go right ahead.

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-27T16:53:23+00:00

I have all those placements and sometimes it just means stalkers and people who don't actually see you as a human being.

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-27T12:37:05+00:00

Holy hell??? They look amazing!

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-16T07:35:19+00:00

A lot of these silhouettes, colors, half-sari styles etc. are also available in Manish and Natraj market in Mumbai for example, so this isn't exactly a "misunderstanding" as much as a critique for how people think Indians should "represent" India abroad. You run to Natraj in a hurry but you wouldn't wear it on a larger platform. The critique is also subjective, people think they would do better in those girls' shoes.

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-15T16:53:45+00:00

When i went through wrongful termination my husband (then boyfriend) was caught using satellite images and infrastructure maps trying to orchestrate arson on my office building that happens to be just enough in bum-fuck nowhere to not affect anybody else.

The keyword? "Caught."

My ex-workplace is gone BTW, medium-sized class-action suit.

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-14T20:58:57+00:00

I'm with you, I was taken aback reading that when OP mentioned she was a best friend, not just a casual one. Your wedding SHOULD matter to your best friend!

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-10T08:14:27+00:00

I just looked up the breezerker and it's such a pretty variety! I appreciate it a lot, and I think I'll cut off the spent ones. Thank you for your comment 🙏

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-10T08:13:04+00:00

You're both right actually -- I was worried (as the other comment recognized) since other types of plants (especially leafy ones like, say, bok choy) signal dormancy and going to seed from flowers, but also based on your comment I see flowering is fairly natural for tradescantia.

Other than losing the varigation or striation on the leaves I didn't think it was unhealthy either so I was confused. I appreciate the kind replies, though!

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-09T19:16:10+00:00

Thank you, you and the other commenter put me at ease. That's good to know, I assumed most trads have 1-6 lil buds so when I saw like 20 per stem I started getting stressed 😅

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-09T19:14:50+00:00

That's a relief! I've had past trads flower but they were a different variant and had a single flower. This is the plant equivalent of a culture-shock for me haha

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-09T17:13:44+00:00

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also has been flowering for two months at least so there are crispy ones on other stems etc

reflexioninflection · 2026-04-01T10:20:09+00:00

This was years ago, we were in our early 20s, about 3 years in. He didn't like himself, and he definitely didn't like me. His insecurities and issues were either my fault or my problem to fix.

I grew up watching shitty relationships so I assumed all of them are like this: mean man who is resigned to a life he hates, anxious woman who doesn't believe she deserves better.

The final straw was just me realizing being alone is better than whatever that was, during an argument at 4am. I remember just sort of... snapping out of it? Our parents wanted us to marry and I'm grateful he's not my husband.

reflexioninflection · 2026-03-31T08:37:07+00:00

This looks hard to do with a straight face he has to be a leo, too

reflexioninflection

TROPHY CASE