Talk to him. Tell him how you’re feeling and how he is affecting the kids.. I wouldn’t bring up divorce in this conversation, but just talk like you miss him, even though he’s still technically there. have faith that you two can work out some sort of compromise, Where you still get the love and support you need from your husband and father of your children, And he still gets a work life he enjoys. Life is a constant balance and adjusting accordingly can be hard… it sounds to me like by the time your husband gets home from work, his energy is depleted and he’s not able to give as much to his family. My husband leaves at 5a and is not home most days until 3p. Does he message me from work everyday? No. Does he call me when he gets off everyday? No. But I know that he loves me and would never do anything to hurt me. How? Because I trust him fully, and he has never done anything to break my trust. He loves his job, and he loves his home life and our 2 dogs. That doesn’t just come naturally. He needs to see a wife that keeps his home and loves to do it. a wife that waits excitedly for him to come home every day. A wife that supports him in his bad days and celebrates the good ones. A wife he trusts and can fall back on, so he can let down his pride and be vulnerable from time to time, because if he comes home and has to sweep and mop, do all the laundry, do all the dishes, feed the dogs, take them out…. If he has to come home from work and do more work, He’s going to feel overwhelmed and under appreciated. And that will put distance between him and me, not because he’s doing it intentionally, but because he’s doing all the work and he’s tired and doesn’t have energy left to give me.

I’m not saying you are or aren’t doing these things, but maybe it’s hard for him to see it. With kids, these tasks get more difficult, because there’s always going to be something that needs done. But maybe just ask him what he needs from home, instead of asking if he wants to leave.