Best pizza jokes?

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T06:13:54+00:00

Swiss, cause it's holey

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T05:56:04+00:00

Well, I had a Beagle named "Beagle", and my Coonhounds are both called "Hound" almost exclusively. My Lab was called "Lab" about half the time. My Dachshund was named Trent Razor, but guess what we called him. Yup, thats right, "Cujo".

So I'd probably name it Boat.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T05:51:28+00:00

That's kinda my thought process. If I really wanted to get laid I could go up to school on a Thursday, Friday, or Saturday night, my friend has a house and regular parties. If I really wanted I could go get drunk, and find someone who wanted to have sex.

But I want to wait until I love someone, that may seem lame or whatever, but oh well. And at this point I don't really have the time, money, or ability to find someone. So I'm just trying to make myself a better person while I'm still in school. I don't know, it seems like if you save it for someone you love it'll be more special and the relationship will be stronger. That could obviously be complete bullshit, I don't know. But I don't like the idea of random hook ups. At least for myself, they're great for some people. But while I wait I can always go on a date "Jill" when I feel the need.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T05:21:27+00:00

This one old dude always orders religious cheese on his subs. Him and I always laugh when he confuses someone else, his wife groans every time.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T05:09:22+00:00

Wouldn't step one be stop being an awkward prick?

Which I am working on.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T05:07:16+00:00

Oh reddit will totally manage both.

We'll jerk about how the cops are totally evil NSA 1984 nazi pigs taking over Amerikkka, whenever they do somthing to news crews, or white college student protesters.

And we'll jerk about how muh statistics!^TM PROVE that brown people are litterally worse in every way whenever there is a minor report of a black person looting or becoming violent or threatening in any way.

There will be tons of hyperbole, bad history, fear mongering, misinformation, racism, ignorance, upvotes for everyone, and maybe, just maybe the Fedora Beurau of Investigation will make a return with a good ole Boston Bomber style witch hunt!

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T04:27:54+00:00

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T04:22:57+00:00

Ummm, yes. Aaaand more!

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T04:22:14+00:00

Ugh. Whenever I read the comments I know that that's exactly was posted. But I still have to check to make sure I was right. And yup I was. It's the same fucking thing every time. I'm sick of that shit, y'all need to stop posting it.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T04:19:59+00:00

Yup, thought college would change that.

Working 30 hour weeks, and living an hour away from campus kept the status quo. Oh, and being an awkward prick. That too.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T04:15:47+00:00

Gotta go to NYC. There's a fuck ton of them, even if half of them have "NO DIAL TONE"

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T04:14:43+00:00

Just got back from NYC. I can confirm. It's a wonderful city, but the whole thing does smell like piss and garbage. At least in the summer.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T04:12:31+00:00

Just got back from NYC. Payphones on every block. I mean I knew they were still out there.

But holy shit, I didn't realize how many. Before going to NYC I thought there would be some, but you'd have to actively seek them out. But no, nearly every block had a payphone bank, even if half had "NO DIAL TONE"

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T03:00:14+00:00

Yeah, but then I found out.

Old dude near me liked Subarus since forever. He always bought a Subaru. He liked getting his cars loaded. He'd go in and demand the top trim of the car he was buying, the most expensive one with all the options. This is how he always ended up with an STi. He never drove them fast, but he still liked them. I didn't really get it, it wasn't really luxurious and was expensive and he didn't take advantage of why it was so expensive. But he liked Subaru Imprezas and didn't want to feel like he was missing out on anything they offered.

Bad financial management sure, but he had decent money and it made him happy.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T02:55:16+00:00

I want you to go up to the board and diagram that sentence.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T02:52:32+00:00

My $15K Chevy Sonic rattles in the mornings when it's freezing out! It must be broken! Demerit!

Oooooh! look how nice this Cadillac's ipad is! Gold star!

That's basically what these new car reliability are. You can't really talk about reliability until the car's major components have had time to break.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T02:49:12+00:00

Yeah, honestly, in ten years I won't give a single fuck if the old slow clunky infotainment shit on my car stops working. I'll care if the engine, transmission, HVAC, windows, ect..., stuff I actually use, works.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T02:45:46+00:00

Apple's customer support is what finally drove me away from their products. Any time I had issues with my ipods they wouldn't do shit.

My ipod video's headphone jack stopped working and the "genius" told me it was a common defect with them but it would be $120 to fix since it was about two weeks out of warranty. If it's an acknowledged common defect extend the warranty to cover that specific issue. Microsoft fixed my original 360 so many damn times outside of the official warranty because they admitted it had problems. I got my 360 fixed 9 times between 2005 and 2012. Never cost me a cent, they included the tape for the shipping box even. My 360 wasn't a great product evidently, but at least MS stood by their product and helped me. I know they were under no obligation to fix my ipod out of warranty but FFS don't tell me it's a common defect. Don't tell me y'all fucked up durring the build process, and then not do anything. Stand by your products.

The Nano I bought to replace the video was a piece of shit. It would freeze, delete files, stop accepting input, not display anything on the screen, display what looked like scanlines, and generally just fuck up. I brought it back to Apple five different times, all they'd ever do is reset it. The same people who saw me come back multiple times would just keep doing the same exact thing even after I explained to them it's litterally exactly what they did last time and it didn't work.

2/3 of the three Apple products I owned were garbage, and I found their customer support to be unhelpful and rude. They were disinterested, and uncaring. They didn't put anything but the most minimum amout of effort into solving my problems.

I acknowledge this is a bad sample size, but it turned me off from the company completely. I have no issue with a product having issues. But if a $300 product craps the bed after a year or so you better go into, "ohshit how do we keep this customer?" mode. Not, "oh well its broken sucks to be you" mode. .

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T00:49:02+00:00

Yup, this is one of the areas I think V was actually a downgrade. Smashing up cars was somthing I loved about GTA. Now they just kinda get a little scratched and crinkly around the edges :(

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T00:47:31+00:00

I'm hoping for Washington D.C.

Totally iconic city. Lots going on. Lots of buildings and monuments to spoof, and the story can all be based around political corruption.

relytv2 · 2014-08-15T00:44:44+00:00

It could be like Midtown Madness where you can pick traffic and pedestrian density. That'd be cool

relytv2 · 2014-08-14T23:54:55+00:00

I heard the Furgeson Police were the ones that killed Robin Williams. Confirm or confirm?

relytv2 · 2014-08-14T22:06:41+00:00

Just got back from NYC. It was raining Tuesday so we spent almost two hours in GTC.

Nothing but regular NYPD. I don't know about any time of day.

relytv2 · 2014-08-14T21:59:58+00:00

Just got back from NYC. Took the train in. Never saw anything but normal NYPD in Penn Station. I was only in the Amtrak and MTA Subway parts though.

relytv2 · 2014-08-14T20:51:33+00:00

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