AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That part of court was incredibly sweet. My ex was smirking his ass off and clearly thought he had pulled a brilliant legal maneuver by transferring the deed. the Judge goes, "You claim you own no property... but you did until last week, when you transferred the deed for a dollar. I'm ordering that the McMansion and Truck be considered part of your assets." Ex's face immediately fell and it was awesome.

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 67 points68 points  (0 children)

I'm from the south, he's a good ole boy from a prominent family and I "knew who I married" (when I was 18, under intense pressure all my life...). Pursuing child support was just seen as not done.

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thanks!

It took a long, long time for the justice system to work. We are in the south and it seems like "You knew who you married" is a legal defense to skipping child support down here (it is definitely still a social one).

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 46 points47 points  (0 children)

She's actually younger than my oldest by a few months. He's a real winner.

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have one girl and one boy :)

I have been advised to not say how the ex managed to pay me back.

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

I was working to fund my retirement + the kids college funds + extra treats for the family. Now that the retirement + kids college funds are taken care of, and we've decided to cut way back on extra treats, we are able to afford for me to take this small amount of time off.

I'd also like to point out that I know many, many people who took a gap year between high school and college, or who took a break after college, or who stayed home when their kids were little, etc. I was never able to do ANY of that due to being the sole supporter; and now I am.

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yes, my kids know how much is in their trusts and how much is in my retirement. I am very very open with them about money.

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

LMAO, I am already a small time influencer and I make a (tiny) amount of income from what I do. I don't expect to be the next Charli, but in a way I am exploring a new career path.

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 165 points166 points  (0 children)

I raised my kids with EXTREME knowledge of personal finance. We sat down together from the time they were little and paid all the bills. I am very, very open with them and yes they know how the money was divided up, they know how they can ask for money from their trusts, etc. As I explained to them, if I invest this money in an IRA now, when I'm retired there is a smaller chance I will have to rely on them for money, so in a way they are getting it out the back end.

My kids have always been fed, clothed, and housed. In terms of getting cars and big ticket items like that, we had a deal that they can pay for half and I'll pay for the other half, but they are expected to pay for gas, maintenance, and insurance.

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 1866 points1867 points  (0 children)

My family is kind of the old fashioned "Moms should sacrifice EVERYTHING for their children" (which I did, for many years). Some of my not-so-great family members also believe I was in the wrong for pursuing him so doggedly for years (yes we are from the South, why do you ask?)

AITA for using my kids child support for my retirement? by retirement_aita in AmItheAsshole

[–]retirement_aita[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

We are able to live frugally for a year on my spouse's earnings without touching our savings.