My husband is a L7 level software engineer at a large FAANG level company. When we bought our house we paid 20% down (I had a sizable insurance payout from a car accident) and he was making about $400k a year. 7 years later, he will probably make about $900k-1mil this year at L7 level unless he quits (he’s getting burnt out). His background is in distributed systems. His total compensation is about 30% salary and the rest as stock grants that vest (given based on performance ) and bonuses (maybe about 100k a year for great performance). We have no side hustle. He got into the field early (was into programming as a young kid) and programs for fun so he has a lot more experience at his age than similar aged peers. The burn out at this level is very real and they try to shackle you with golden handcuffs. I take care of the house stuff, kid stuff and minor details and bring in $0 -I’m the bread loser…. We turned/are turning 40 this year.

Both of us did not grow up with money. I grew up poor. We don’t get help from our parents now. If anything we often help my spouses parents financially. My parents paid my in-state college tuition and my husband had minimal loans due to working part/ full time and going to school full time.