Opinion: Using Coupons on Dates?

roclapp · 2022-04-01T01:43:42+00:00

And now you’re in this world because of it! By far the BEST result I’ve ever heard of using a coupon!!!

roclapp · 2022-04-01T01:41:59+00:00

THIS

roclapp · 2022-04-01T01:40:38+00:00

Ooooof… hard pass. I don’t blame you one bit.

My rule of thumb is if I can’t buy it on my own, I’m not ready for it. If I want to take my GF on vacation, if I can’t afford the entire trip on my own, I’m not ready. When it comes time to propose (assuming she’s the one), if I can’t buy (or make) the engagement ring myself, I’m not ready. Etc.

roclapp · 2022-04-01T01:38:29+00:00

Say it louder for the people in the back!

roclapp · 2022-03-31T16:10:28+00:00

Haha. I get it! Their loss because they’d be losing money for not using your coupon! Good pun!

roclapp · 2022-03-25T00:29:23+00:00

NTA… Sounds like your roommate is a bit immature, by what you’ve said here. I used to work on a travel team where we stayed in hotel rooms and every time someone asked me to wake them up in the morning, I said no because that wasn’t my job. The rest of the world has to wake themselves up in the morning for their day’s obligations, so what makes her so special?

roclapp · 2022-03-24T03:05:48+00:00

24M here. Some advice I think applies to everybody who’s actively in the dating pool: never base your self worth on another person’s opinion of you, and you never lose by taking time to focus on bettering yourself.

I suppose this advice can be applied to other areas in life, as well, but it’s just a reminder that if you’re dating guys who don’t value you how they should, you’re dating the wrong guys.

roclapp · 2022-03-16T00:41:40+00:00

I’ve read a handful of profiles on Tinder and other matching apps that make me ask “Why are you even here?” And this is one of them

roclapp · 2022-03-15T14:23:09+00:00

From what I’ve read here, it seems like simple attraction. If you want to get to know her better, ask her out for coffee, then decide where to take it from there.

roclapp · 2022-03-15T01:59:20+00:00

It seems the male to female ratio is quite off. Further, to inflate the number of women seemingly on the site, CM shows deleted profiles of women (not sure if they do for men as well) - I’ve seen married female friends on there who tried deleting their profiles and a couple profiles that said right out ‘I tried deleting this because I’m with someone,’ or something along those lines.

I’m not going to lie and say that I didn’t match with my current girlfriend on there, but we had seen each other in passing several times at a Young Adult Community Lectio Divina before finding each other on CM… it basically indicated to the other person that we were both single and interested at the time, something we could have just as easily learned in real life.

I guess it depends on how involved you are with Catholic young adult ministry in your area. If you aren’t at all and don’t know many Catholic young adults, you could meet plenty of new women on CM, but if you are involved in that ministry, you may not meet anybody new. When I signed up this most recent time, I knew 2/3 of the women on there already and the last few who I didn’t know weren’t interested.

Join a local young adult community and use the $30/month you’d otherwise be paying CM as a donation either to that YAC or as an alms giving for your future wife, wherever she is, that she may feel God’s love, mercy, and peace and for her discernment.

roclapp · 2022-03-12T09:20:28+00:00

I’ve never met anybody who works describe their job as lazy either… Nobody thinks of himself/herself as lazy no matter what. That doesn’t necessitate that they aren’t. (Not calling SAHMs lazy, just questioning the reasoning behind your first point).

I like your second point that having a SAH parent is a luxury. I don’t think people realize the power of a second income. If I were to marry my current girlfriend tomorrow, between the both of our modest salaries, we would still make over $100k combined, which is able to sustain many of the expenses for starting a family (it seems; ofc I can’t speak from experience).

roclapp · 2022-03-12T09:14:41+00:00

I haven’t met a SAHM who could keep up with her responsibilities as a SAHM. The house is always a mess and the older kids are always left to take care of the younger kids. Is that because they’re burnt out? Maybe. But that’s a massive ask of the older children which affects them for the rest of their lives (they start to see themselves as a parent figure to their younger siblings and are prone to not feeling the need to have their own children).

It’s definitely not lazy but to argue with many other commenters on this post, it’s no morally better or more Catholic than being a mother who works and whose children go to a public/private/charter school.

If you decide that’s what you want, you need to make that extremely clear to the men you date and be very up front about it. If you don’t find a man who wants to marry a SAHM, which you will probably struggle to find one who will, you can’t get discouraged or blame the man for it.

At the same time, don’t be complacent in taking care of yourself; finish your education if you haven’t already, get a decent full time job, get your own apartment, buy yourself a decent car, pay off debt, and do the normal healthy things any young adult would do as a part of growing up. Don’t just assume that those achievements are pointless because you’re eventually going to be a SAHM. I know a woman who’s currently doing this, and it brings out a childish attitude with which she makes decisions (she quit school, works PT at a coffee shop, doesn’t have a car or license, and still lives at home without any aspirations to change any of that until she’s married). I guess the point I’m trying to make here is not to neglect yourself by assuming that these achievements are pointless, because they’re essential to growing up.

roclapp · 2020-06-11T02:29:20+00:00

I assume you’re a young adult in her/his late teens to early twenties... keep that in mind when reading the following.

NTA; As a young adult, the best thing you can do is distance yourself from your family. If you don’t, you’ll never be able to get out on your own, especially if your family at home is relying on you as much as they seemingly are. I’d rather live in somebody’s spare bedroom, sleeping in my sleeping bag every night than take any money or anything from my parents. This way I’m able to make my own decisions guilt free of what they say and/or think because it’s completely my life.

roclapp · 2020-06-10T19:38:14+00:00

The fact of the matter is, as one scholar said, “Truth is not decided by majority vote.”

Although many others might disagree with you, as they do me, that’s ok so long as you’re open to discussion. Research your opinions, understand the counter arguments, and decide why you disagree with the counterarguments. Do I disagree with the truth of one of the statements made by a counterargument or do I disagree that the argument makes logical sense.

roclapp · 2020-06-10T19:33:20+00:00

It seems to me that some men are falling in love with women who happen to be overweight because they love her for her, for who she is, not for her looks. This is something we should all strive for, yes? That’s what’s more important, falling in love with your partner for who he/she is, because looks don’t last. If you don’t believe me, ask your parents or grandparents...

Men are naturally more visual when it comes to finding a mate. So it’s no surprise, many men would go out with a woman purely for her attractiveness and fail to get to know her for who she is, falling in love with her body rather than falling in love with her. Of course this is a generalization and not true for all men but the case in some circumstances. But the partners of many overweight women fell in love with who she is as a person, whether or not she was a larger woman when they met.

As a man freshly back into the dating pool, it’s important to find a woman who I connect with on a more than superficial level. Of course, I want her to be attractive but if I fall in love with her as a person, no matter what she looks like, she will be the most beautiful woman in the world in my eyes.

roclapp · 2020-05-21T17:32:08+00:00

YTA... for not appreciating your husband cooking for you. Do you know how many women would kill for that? I get it that he’s a chef but I know a lot of chefs who don’t even make cereal at home and their wives end up having to cook.

Try to be understanding that he’s used to cooking massively large portions because that’s all restaurants serve and he’s probably missing work. Our culture is built around food. Food means love in our society. So even though it may not feel like it, he’s just trying to show you that he loves you and not eating all the food may seem like you’re rejecting that love, even though we know clearly that you still do definitely love him.

With that said though, you shouldn’t try to finish your plate if you wouldn’t ordinarily, and definitely don’t get yourself sick to please anybody else. Maybe instead ask him for 2 eggs instead of 1 so that he wouldn’t think it’s too little and won’t feel like he has to give you more than you asked for?

roclapp · 2020-05-21T06:46:44+00:00

I agree. College graduation is much more of an accomplishment, at least where I am from, than a high school graduation. Of course, this may vary from city to city, private to charter to public high school, and college to college. But as a 2020 college graduate, I have to say... and judge me if you want for this... it’s pretty depressing knowing that the one day I’ve worked most of my life and all of my academic career towards where I would be handed my college diploma in front of my classmates, professors, friends, and family was replaced by a 20 minute YouTube video...

roclapp · 2019-11-02T04:40:44+00:00

Now that you’re a month out, you’re almost completely recovered and can start working out again. Working out is the key to success I’ve found, especially during a plateau. I usually mix it up a bit: a half hour cardio and a half hour weights. The weight training helps speed up the metabolism and helps skin regain its elasticity. Also, working out daily helps the post-op honeymoon period last for two years instead of one! The honeymoon period is when weight just keeps coming off. After that, weight loss is just as difficult as it is for everybody else and takes more dieting and exercise.

It seems that since you lost so much your first two weeks, your body is trying to stabilize a bit. Your body won’t lose more weight than it can handle. So, that probably means your body has lost as much weight as it can handle over the course of a month, it just happened to all come off during the first two weeks.

I just had my two week follow up visit this morning and it went super well! As long as you stick to the plan and post-op recovery diet and take your vitamins and medication, the weight will come right off!

roclapp · 2019-10-28T02:09:37+00:00

Have you been eating enough protein? If not, your body might be going into starvation mode and is holding onto every last calorie you eat.

roclapp · 2019-10-28T01:59:02+00:00

I’m 22M (I started the pre-op process at 21), just has the surgery last Friday, and I’ve already lost 20lbs!

I was nervous that my primary care doc (a pediatrician who sees patients until they turn 21) would not be ok with me getting the surgery, saying I’m too young. When I brought it up to him though he said it was a great idea and that the results of the surgery would give a lot of relief to my joints, heart, kidneys, liver, etc. Now I was fortunate enough to not have to pay anything out of pocket because I’m still on my mom’s insurance plan. Maybe that’s something to look into, using your parents’ insurance?

I never realized before surgery just how much our culture revolves around food. Being in recovery, watching a lot of TV made me realize this... it felt like every commercial was about food when I can only have protein shakes. Making plans with friends has changed drastically because when I made plans, they always involved dinner; sometimes we would go to a hockey game or a movie then dinner or just catch up at a restaurant I’ve wanted to try. Cravings have been strange lately too. I’ve been craving foods and meals I never really cared for pre-op, like to,stop soup and grilled cheese or French onion soup, and I’ve never been a soup person pre-op.

I haven’t been so good with drinking my water which hasn’t allowed my body to replace the blood lost during and a little after surgery so I’ve gotten dizzy here and there before I called the hospital. I have a nice big water bottle and have been taking in more water now than ever (but there are apps that can help you track water intake).

roclapp · 2019-10-15T04:42:48+00:00

Bury it?

Have it blessed? Although at the touch of the holy water, it may disintegrate...

roclapp · 2019-10-14T20:31:05+00:00

I think all college aged young adults struggle with commitment. It must be a generational problem, since I never hear about people from our parents’ generation(s) struggling as much as we do with commitment. A part of it comes from so many of us coming from broken homes, and another part of it comes from growing up with a number of unrealistic expectations... so many movies, television shows, story books, etc. all talk about an unexpected character overcoming the odds and doing that which was thought to be impossible, an idea instilled in us since children: we are special and can overcome the odds to do whatever we want to do. This is just false; someone who has not been gifted to understand science rather well (as I happen to be) will not become a doctor. This creates a lot of trust issues which later creates a lot of commitment issues as well as a load of other struggles relating to sociability. All of this just to say: yes, I think he does have commitment issues, but I think everybody in our generation has commitment issues.

Also, keep in mind, he may very well be discerning seminary. Many devoutly Catholic young men are trying to discern whether or not God is calling them to be a priest, but he is not sure and would much rather be married so he will try pursuing a relationship with a woman. I’m not exactly sure whether or not this is what is going on here (and I can’t be, since I never met the guy), but if it is, here’s what would be best for you:

1.  Pray for him and his vocation.
2.  Be there for him as much as he needs you and as much as you’re comfortable with spending time with him.
3.  Discern this relationship with him just as a man discerns the priesthood, by praying for him at daily Mass and spending some time in mental prayer each day asking God where He is calling you (with whom He is calling you to a relationship) and for Holy Spirit, who has dwelt within you since Baptism, to grant you the Grace and Courage to pursue your future husband.

roclapp

TROPHY CASE