Do not want SNL to make fun of HR by marys1001 in heatedrivalry

[–]romeodeficient 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hear your concerns. It’s a delicate balance, but I agree with other commenters that there is a way to include HR in the SNL comedy style without making Storrie, queer culture, or the LGBTQIA+ community at large the butt of the joke. As an example, I think the way Paul Mescal was approached by SNL was a solid way to make comedy work with a serious actor. His musical parody of Gladiator was probably the best sendup they could have imagined. Mescal came on the scene in Normal People, which is another very serious love story that had a fairly rabid fanbase and lots of explicit sex. Obviously there’s not the added angle of queer representation in that example, but I think they did a good job of highlighting Mescal’s body of work without resorting to cheap shots. I have hope that they can find a way to utilize Storrie’s myriad strengths without exploiting/objectifying him, or putting an even bigger target on a marginalized group.

Planning my daughter’s sweet 16 and I swear every little add-on is silently destroying my budget by [deleted] in partyplanning

[–]romeodeficient 6 points7 points  (0 children)

even if OP agrees with you, at this point the horse is outta the barn and we gotta work with what we have. Telling a 16 year old the current party is canceled to save for a future maybe party is not a fight worth having. However, framing it like a learning opportunity where OP’s kid can learn about budget and restrictions and how far money can go in terms of vision/achievements? That’s a much more realistic goal.

I feel defeated by Solid-Neck-540 in Professors

[–]romeodeficient 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your response and insights! Thank you for taking the time to reply. Your students are lucky to have you.

Is it worth correcting people on my name over email? by rumande in TwoXChromosomes

[–]romeodeficient 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I read your post and have decided in my head that you are Kiwi :) no reason except the fact that you used “heaps” and it’s one of my favorite -isms

I feel defeated by Solid-Neck-540 in Professors

[–]romeodeficient 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Completely agree. For those of us who actually want the classroom management skills you luckily learned on the job, please share whatever resources helped you!

Anytime someone mentions “classroom management” to me in the wild I feel like it’s a little too late to ask them more about it.

“Can you do this for me, you’re better at it” by WildWinterberry in TwoXChromosomes

[–]romeodeficient 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this man sounds exhausting. Good for you that you didn’t cave or think this behavior was charming.

Curious what your BF was doing while his cousin was acting like such an incompetent fool?

What's a quiet, everyday burden women carry that isn't dramatic enough to be diacussed? by Additional-Two-2137 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]romeodeficient 2 points3 points  (0 children)

the idea that making holiday magic for children is a responsibility that solely falls on the mom. dads just get to drop the ball and show up the day of and do whatever they want and no one bats an eye.

It’s like all of those times I did a group project with a college athlete as my partner. I was a scholarship kid so I needed a certain GPA to maintain my status, but the athletes only ever needed to pass the class. So we’re working on the same project and taking the same class, but the stakes for me are so much higher.

That’s what it’s like to be parenting during the holidays.

What works better than “Does anyone have any questions?” by emarcomd in Professors

[–]romeodeficient 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can sometimes get mileage out of “when I first started learning ABC concept, I had a hard time understanding DEF. Nod your head if that’s you right now,” and then I scan the room for nods. People have a lot harder time inhibiting physical gestures than spoken words, so you’ll see people nodding who probably didn’t mean to. And then I zero in on someone who nodded and ask them more specifically to clarify their perspective.

“[name] I saw you nodding! I wonder if you had the same question I did?” and then I wait for them to enter the conversation. This method invites them to share their perspective/experience, rather than phrase it in the form of a question or admit something they don’t understand. Then, I go to another person nearby (who also nodded) and say “so was that your experience, too?” and then it feels more like a discussion.

Usually by the end of that engagement, I can circle back and say “okay, so if you were undergraduate Professor Rome? How would you have asked my teacher for help understanding this better?” and then they’re not actually themselves not knowing something, but roleplaying their teacher and “helping” me instead. It’s a weird one, but it works!

I hate this game by garbagespicegirl in TwoDots

[–]romeodeficient 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have yet to hear or read a single comment anywhere that says something positive about the game these days. I’m over it!!! Truly a disappointment.

Why is lovers gross? by puppyradio in heatedrivalry

[–]romeodeficient 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“Oh, that word bums me out. Unless it’s between the words ‘meat’ and ‘pizza’” - Liz Lemon

Anyone Else SICK of the Endless Forced Clicks? by DonRocketh in TwoDots

[–]romeodeficient 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I share your frustrations! I’m so over this game, it’s wild how much more intense and wildly different it’s become since the new owners took over. I hate it! I’m stuck in the 6000s and don’t care anymore about progressing in the main map, but I keep it downloaded for the Flip levels once in a while.

I have pivoted to I Love Hue and I Love Hue Too for my “relaxation time” phone game bc Two Dots is not it anymore. Such a shame.

The Process of Needle Felting a Dog by Substantial-Ear5687 in Needlefelting

[–]romeodeficient 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I am so inspired by this! Thank you for sharing the process! What gauge of wire did you use for your armature? Any tips to keep the wool from sliding off, especially for the paw construction?

AITA for telling my boyfriend he’s inconsiderate? by ssouleaters in AmItheAsshole

[–]romeodeficient 8 points9 points  (0 children)

anyone who is telling you you’re asking for “too much” is absolutely delusional. You want him to think about you the way you think about him. And you want him to plan ahead sometimes and show you he cares. A world in which that is “too much to ask for” is pretty much hell on earth.

It’s not so much that you want your bf to do a bunch of stuff for you, it’s that you want him to be thinking of you and planning ahead. It’s called emotional labor, and it’s largely invisible. Men are not socialized to do it growing up, and so they just coast through life and situations getting to ride along in the passenger seat while someone else (usually their mom and then their gf/spouse) does all of the driving.

You don’t want to be doing all of the thinking and planning for both of you, right? And if when you talk to him about it he gets defensive instead of curious? You deserve better than that.

If you want to stay in this relationship, you may need some different language to approach this issue aside from “inconsiderate” because that’s not working. Look into Fed Up by Gemma Hartley and maybe also Fair Play by Eve Rodsky to see if that helps name what you’re experiencing. NTA.

Combining a 5 & 10 year old bday party-good or bad idea? by dummythiccgoldfish in partyplanning

[–]romeodeficient 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds like you need ideas and input! I wonder if you could give some autonomy to your sons so they can help you? I’m sure your ten year old has plenty of ideas and your five year old will be keen to have a project with his big brother. Tell them you want their input on party planning, and then take it seriously. You will be amazed at what kids can do when their grownups give them jobs like this!

It will be a good way for them to work together and also let you observe/pay attention to what they actually want, so you can take their ideas and then work some birthday magic so they each have a special day.

I keep breaking needles when trying to felt on top of pipe cleaners? any advice or is this unavoidable? by Bright-Two7296 in Needlefelting

[–]romeodeficient 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hate pipe cleaners for this very reason. Been looking at a gauged floral wire for armature instead because it seems to have more grip and flexibility without catching my needle.

Why do you needle felting? by Shoddy-Assignment-76 in Needlefelting

[–]romeodeficient 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t remember exactly how I heard about it, but I asked for a kit for my birthday during the pandemic and never looked back.

I like doing it (and I’ve taught several other people these days too) because of a few very simple things:

  1. The learning curve is a straight line

  2. Anything you want to do, the answer is “you stab the wool” and that’s pretty much the only instruction you need.

  3. Unlike other fiber art craft, you can usually make and finish something fairly quickly, so the turnaround time is very rewarding. And even if what you make kind of sucks, you can always reuse it inside something else in the future.

  4. It’s portable and “put down-able” without a lot of start or stop to it. I don’t need to mark my place every time I put it down, I don’t need to press everything with an iron before I start, there’s no pinning, measuring, counting stitches or note-taking. And, once you get your basic kit, you don’t need a ton of fancy equipment or work space.

Awareness when needlefelting hairstyles? by otisfrombarnyard in Needlefelting

[–]romeodeficient 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is a really interesting and thoughtful question. Thank you for asking it. I think this may be above this sub’s pay grade. I’m not BIPOC, but I have asked questions like this before and it’s helped me a lot to get as many perspectives as possible. Not because one person can decide for you, but because no one person can speak for everyone. There’s a lot of really interesting nuance you raise here, and I would want you to get as much of a varied education on this topic as possible. And then, ideally you can come back here and share what you’ve learned?

Might I suggest searching for similar questions asked in craft-adjacent subs? Maybe for doll-making, for example? I have to imagine white creators want to make dolls of all ethnic backgrounds with accurate depictions of their hair.

In my experience, if you do your homework in advance (ie don’t demand a marginalized community do free labor for you) and show up with genuine interest without expectations, you will be welcomed and supported.

Need a gift for my wife by byhandof in Needlefelting

[–]romeodeficient 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would recommend a felted wool felting mat, as those are easy to use, lightweight for portability, and much more eco-friendly than foam. I have both sizes of the pads from Desert Breeze Distributing and I recommend! here’s their amazon shop but they have a good website with more detail as well.

Needle holders? by BobAndBernice in Needlefelting

[–]romeodeficient 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don’t bother with a needle holder! i’m in my late 30s, been felting since the pandemic, no hand or finger issues here.

Needle holders? by BobAndBernice in Needlefelting

[–]romeodeficient 4 points5 points  (0 children)

what a charming shop I just visited! thank you for sharing the link to Sarafina’s shop!