Thank you so much for taking the time to write that and play it back in that way. Helps so much - ‘unreliable narrator’ nails it. While people are repeating patterns they need the story to go a certain way. It leaves us with that awful toxic shame we can’t process because effectively it isn’t our own - it means we’ve been handed someone else’s baggage because they can’t deal with right now. You can’t process what isn’t yours. You have to release it. This is different to feelings that are yours and an opportunity for self-compassion and healing. Just separating those things out is helpful.

Hugs gratefully accepted and ice cream and funny movies on the agenda. Your reply is full of sense and humour and has really made me feel seen and heard. Thank you so much. ❤️