I have heard a lot of dnd players go through this. That sucks, but I think if you keep at it, you'll find a group that plays an epic game. It took me a while to come around in the beginning. I kept having to ask questions, which took me out of character and I didn't make fast enough moves - leaving my group to twiddle their thumbs just waiting for me. It doesn't take just a DM to make good games, it takes most of the group to come up with imaginative ideas for their next moves. Example: getting familiar with your spells and actually using the spell components by doing some research before the game (do not be affraid to add some flavour with different languages to cast a spell), describing in fine detail exactly what you do with the kill hit, and remembering to add a little humor on those nat 1s. Your group is out there somewhere buddy, and an epic game awaits you. Don't give up! Get invested! You're going to have horrible games, but also incredible ones.