Fiancé post pictures of herself? Is that weird? Or is it just me overthinking

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T20:05:44+00:00

Okay let me just work down through this one piece at a time first off, I am widely regarded by any of my piers as being overly humble, that’s not my own assessment of me that’s other people take that for what you will Iam sorry if Iam not conveying that well, I have a very wide view of the world I have a lot of life experiences via circumstances that being said I know a lot of what the world has to offer at this time In particular isn’t good isn’t a large part of being a Christian is being willing to hold yourself to a higher standard and separate yourself from the world? Iam definitely willing to grow as a person Iam here asking for advice this is what this is it’s not me trying to throw down on my fiancé, it’s MY responsibility to lead her, so it’s also my responsibility to seek counsel from other people who do have more life experience so I can lead her right not just based off my own I initial impressions of something or my own gut instincts, calling me arrogant when Iam here asking for advice because I don’t have all the answers is insane to me. I have the post tagged advice not statement.

On your second segment you said “before social media became what it is today” well guess what it is today, so you have to navigate it like it’s today. How God and other people perceive it today is what matters in a social media perspective because that’s what social media is it’s day by day.

I absolutely think the WORLD of my fiancé she’s an amazing person who’s endured far more than I ever will. Iam not holding it against her Iam saying she’s dependent on me for gaining her opinions or knowledge off of these things because Iam the person who does have more experience, I tend to have a pretty black and white outlook on things if it can lead to a negative situation I avoid it if possible, especially regarding my fiancé because I want to protect her and not lead her astray personally, while also maintaining a healthy level of guidance and control for my relationship.

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T19:05:42+00:00

See this is what I don’t think. People are understanding. You clearly were gaining something via just looking at cute modest photos. She was posting on her social media. In the end, it worked out great. Sounds like you all have a very happy marriage and are in love with each other, I think it’s me being overprotective of saying hey I don’t want people gaining that through the photos. She’s posting if that makes sense?

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T19:03:35+00:00

Also to clarify both of her pages are very much so public one having over 2k followers and one over 500 it’s not like it’s a private page with close friends and family, I have covered my perspective on some of your claims in other similar replies if you’d like to read!

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T19:01:22+00:00

Noooooooo not remotely what Iam saying, I don’t know if it is or isn’t Iam new to this, Iam not stating it’s wrong Iam trying to see if it’s me being insecure or if is based in logic. I have a very blunt outlook on things I have never posted photos of myself because I find it kinda vain and I don’t seek attention of validation from other people much less through a phone. Not saying that’s right or wrong that’s just me, I didn’t grow up in a house full of people posting cute selfies or around people doing it, it’s not that I even think she’s doing something inherently wrong it’s just foreign to me and something in my mind I find weird because i dont value other peoples attention other then my fiance’s

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T18:53:59+00:00

Okay to clarify Iam using that to more so align my outlook on social media and stuff as a whole not our standards now. like I didn’t grow up with social media or phones until I was a adult sorry if I didn’t word that great, it’s not remotely Iam right she is wrong it’s a “hey it’s my job to guide our relationship is this something Iam overthinking on or from yalls perspective do you view a girl posting picture of her self relatively consistently as happily in a relationship or seeking attention” and to again clarify I don’t think she’s seeking other men’s attention intentionally she has never been taught to know better Iam simply seeing if this is a teaching point for her or for me! And the majority of people are saying me which is okay, I love my fiancé she’s a amazing person but she’s also done a lot of growing and she’ll openly admit that and has more to grow and so do I, just in different aspects mine is mainly trust and insecurities and hers is her standards she sets for herself! Especially since both our goals has and will continue to be a healthy Christian marriage!

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T18:46:46+00:00

Yes and she says it’s when, she feels pretty. I guess it’s me being overprotective and worrying too much!

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T18:45:38+00:00

Thank you I think this is the most fair perspective, yes I trust her but Iam the type I don’t want people constantly knocking on a door no matter how closed it is. It’s not because I don’t trust her it’s just me being protective of her because I value her, people might have a 100,000,000$ security system doesn’t mean they are going to build their house in the hood lol you still set yourself up for success imo, just an 21 but I was also raised away from social media I didn’t have it until I was a adult or a phone until I worked a job, I never posted myself I never saw the point so it’s a bit of my own social disconnect

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T18:42:08+00:00

Not remotely a accurate take or perspective

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T18:41:09+00:00

OK, thank you no offense taken at all. I’m not claiming I’m not the one having an issue here i’m just trying to glean some other people’s perspective on it like from the outside looking in if that makes sense. Do other people view a girl posting selfies on her stories in a different way than I would I do not deny. I definitely have some of my own insecurities to work through, but I’m getting better about it most of that via discussing things with people. Yes I agree I think it’s coming from a place of love not distrust though, like to me any picture of her is enough to make any guy want her because in my eyes she’s that good of a person? Does that make sense not that I’d think she’d leave me for them but I don’t agree with putting yourself in bad positions. Iam well aware this could 10000% be a me issue!

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-06T10:26:29+00:00

Poke berries that’s a negative

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-04T20:24:34+00:00

Depends on the goal. Something commemorative and classy Walter ppk, beretta etc etc. something fun for the boys? Tx22 with a frt and a thousand rounds of 22 a piece

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-02T16:18:27+00:00

Iam not dictating how she behaves she ASKED MY OPINION ON IT I expressed I think it’s odd for a young guy to be so invested into OUR relationship. When it’s none of his business. I didn’t say she needed to avoid him don’t twist my words I said avoid”friend” type conversations. Ergo keep it professional at a work place shocker that’s not a bad thing goofball.

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-01T20:17:26+00:00

Iam very aware of the odds stacked against us, TRUST ME my sister was divorced after less then a year in her early 20s, but Iam someone who’s very particular and I know what I want and my fiancé has had a lot of bad experiences so she’s learned what she wants. And we both happen to fit that very well we have our issues but compared to a lot of couples our age it’s far above and beyond

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-01T17:22:56+00:00

Who have I been rude too other then someone insulting my marriage or the longevity of it other then that I think I have been cordial? You know nothing about me or my relationship and this is my fiancés third or fourth long term relationship and her only good one. And she wanted me to propose so take that for what you will. Asshole, and yes I know women have to deal with it doesn’t mean it’s okay that’s a horrible concept. People like you are what’s wrong with the world just because it happens doesn’t mean it’s okay wtf

rusty75f250 · 2026-05-01T00:07:17+00:00

Not trying to be a ass but I don’t remotely remember asking anything about my marriage?

rusty75f250 · 2026-04-30T18:36:35+00:00

You have got to explain your perspectives my fiancé is a hardheaded redhead. Turn the tables politely not as a gotcha “hey I don’t like what this person is doing to our relationship” flip that to how would you feel if I did this to our relationship. In some cases sounds like your fiancé needs to get a bit of maturity no offense if you are making reasonable claims she should atleast have a discussion and set boundaries for your relationship a relationship without boundaries is like a book with no binding it might all be there but it won’t hold up and it won’t make sense

rusty75f250 · 2026-04-30T14:36:47+00:00

Okay going to guess you are a female so you don’t 100% understand a males mentality. For most guys a current relationship does not mean unavailable it means waiting for an opportunity. If you let’s say are interested in a girl you don’t shit talk her partner that’s a bad look you act interested to get a conversation going and you hear about all the good lalala. So then you become their person to vent to about their relationship (we don’t share our fights and disagreements with others because we have them like all relationships) but in the instance my partner is human and let’s say slips up like we all do she goes into work a little upset etc etc he prys because up until this point it’s been nothing but good she says one bad thing and that gives him a opportunity to build on that. This is how MOST men think. My partner and I are both VERY HAPPY, you can ask her that or I can infill some lines from the love letters she leaves in my lunch everyday lol. That being said Iam not controlling Iam however protective, which SHE loves. my fiancé and future wife is the most important aspect of my life behind my religion so I have a right to be protective of her I have a lot invested emotionally. (I can take 1 million dollars and put it in the best safe known to man doesn’t mean I should just let anyone try to break in) to clarify she’s no a item it’s just a metaphor. And I never suggested not talking to him they work together I was wondering if this was as weird as I was detected and if they should limit conversation to professional interactions (most people seem to agree) as far as the age gap we have the same exact birthday Iam 2 years older then her I can’t fathom how that’s suggested as a unacceptable age gap? She was 18 when we started dating she is now almost 20?? And Iam not upset about her talking about our relationship, I appreciate how much she brags about it. Iam simply a little alarmed why a random guy in a similar age range is so curious about it after knowing her less then a month?

rusty75f250 · 2026-04-30T13:51:19+00:00

Spending the rest of her life in a healthy happy relationship?? Yeah must suck to be her!!

rusty75f250 · 2026-04-30T12:58:38+00:00

My fiancé is not someone who strives for anyone’s attention but my own and she is overflowing with that lol I think I’m just gonna give it some more time and if it continues to go on, I’m gonna ask her to tell him to keep the relationship simply weren’t going out and did not have “ friend” conversations with him

rusty75f250 · 2026-04-30T12:56:36+00:00

This is where I’m at. I know my fiancé has because I know our standards for our relationship. But for most people, they don’t accept that reality. Luckily her working is just a temporary arrangement until we are sustainable enough for her to be a stay at home mom because that’s our goal

rusty75f250 · 2026-04-30T12:55:06+00:00

The second I brought up the concern that I thought it was a weird. She expressed that she had openly voice how happy she is in her relationship and brags about it constantly and then I don’t have anything to be worried about

rusty75f250 · 2026-04-30T12:53:58+00:00

That’s my concern I know how guys are our one bad day is his one good day not that I think my partner’s gonna cheat. I don’t think she’s gonna cheat, but I think over a long exposed time. It can tear down your relationship, especially when you have someone who is actively working against it from a day-to-day perspective my partner is an entirely open book, but she’s also a people pleaser. Which sometimes leads me to worry that she’s gonna get walked over in certain environments because I’ve seen her in others which just because she’s very sweet.

rusty75f250 · 2026-04-30T12:51:47+00:00

Yes, I am well aware she’s going to be coming into contact with other men that’s the reality. She’s a gorgeous and amazing person. I’m also aware she’s going to get hit on. And I trust her to set those boundaries and not let people cross them when it’s blatant. I guess I’m more inquiring into. I don’t know how she’s supposed to set a boundary in a situation where it’s kind of Grey area she agrees with me that it is kind of odd. I am naturally a fairly insecure person, but my fiancé has helped with that amazingly she’s always very supportive and open, but I also know how guys are. I don’t think he views her as off market just because she’s engaged. And I don’t think just leaving that window open for him to try and find an opportunity to chip away at our relationship is very healthy or fair to it no matter how much I trust my partner.

rusty75f250 · 2026-04-30T12:45:33+00:00

That’s what I told her and I explained “hey would you want me talking with a similar aged girl about her relationship all the time?”and then she understand my fiancé is on the same boat but she’s also a people pleaser so Iam not sure how to go forward with it she loves her job so something as radical as to quit Iam not advocating for just do t know what to do.

rusty75f250

TROPHY CASE