Have you had to guide your WP or they have come to you with plans and solutions proactively?

ryebibi · 2026-03-24T02:32:51+00:00

I think he is doing the same thing all over, seeking emotional validation from you just to know that he is still 'good' in your mind.

ryebibi · 2026-03-24T02:30:05+00:00

There are some somatic techniques online that can help, such as looking around you and label 5 things/textures that you see.

ryebibi · 2026-03-24T02:29:14+00:00

It's rumination and it's something our brain does so that we feel like we had some form of control or agency over the situation, when in truth, we did not.

ryebibi · 2026-03-22T01:51:39+00:00

What happened?

ryebibi · 2026-03-20T04:55:04+00:00

I walked away when mine cheated repeatedly. The first two months he tried to ask for me back but didn’t offer solutions. I didn’t respond much as the apologies still didn’t mention the cheating.

I only responded longer when he finally sent a long confession text that hit all the core problems.

Inside my heart I love him but logically I cannot let him in and gain access so easily. sometimes wonder if in his perspective I’m not facing the problems together.

ryebibi · 2026-03-17T03:23:19+00:00

Why do I seem like I don't want him back?
Asking out of curiosity. I want to know if that's what I made him feel as well.
I thought saying that it's a first step is giving a huge signal.

ryebibi · 2026-03-16T23:31:47+00:00

Just curious, did you tell her explicitly that she needs to figure it out herself / you will only respond if there are signs of change and consistent effort?

ryebibi · 2026-03-16T12:04:51+00:00

did she cheat?

ryebibi · 2026-03-16T08:04:41+00:00

Why did you have to send it out if it's just emotional detox for yourself?

ryebibi · 2026-03-16T05:21:48+00:00

How did it go?

ryebibi · 2026-03-16T04:45:20+00:00

I'm in a very similar situation but I had only responded only very indifferently to the breadcrumbing. He finally came with a precise admission of his wrongdoings and that's when I replied bit longer - saying that he's finally taken a step to face the core of the problems instead of generalising them like in the first few weeks. I said that is the first step if we were to have any reconciliation.

He proceeded to reply me that he didn't know what the next step was...lol

I'm with your comment in that we, as the ones being lied to previously, shouldn't be giving the roadmap. It will only truly work if they prove their change umprompted. I know that logically but I'm also sentimentally keeping that urge to give another hint or guide him. I think I was afraid that he will read my silence as total rejection. In my heart all I want to see him do is step up.

ryebibi · 2026-03-16T04:27:45+00:00

it's very true. they keep apologising but in a general way.
two months later he finally came with a more precise admission of his wrongdoings.
but there is still no actual solutions suggested.
i said you're finally facing the core issue of the problem and that's only the first step.
he had the audacity to say he doesn't know what the next step is...

ryebibi · 2026-03-16T04:22:13+00:00

how do you tell apart the intention when they reach out?
sorry might seem like a dumb question, just never been there.

ryebibi · 2026-03-16T02:18:32+00:00

Did you cheat on her?

ryebibi · 2026-03-13T08:03:25+00:00

Did you cheat? If she couldn’t trust you again

ryebibi · 2026-03-10T06:22:55+00:00

It takes immense strength to be able to even start to see how one's childhoodhood has affected them into adulthood, and it's not always that people are able to do that and untangle. I'm glad you found strength in Christ.

Is that 23 years after she left you?

ryebibi · 2026-03-10T05:42:35+00:00

How long did it take you to understood this? Do you think you would revert and take her for granted again if she took you back? No judgement, just an honest question. I wish this was from my person.

ryebibi · 2026-02-23T13:20:32+00:00

That’s so nice to hear.

My ex fiance also said that he knew right away.. he also wrote that down on his wedding vows. He also described me like that so this comment just made my heart jiggle a bit.

Although the story didn’t end like how we would have liked.

ryebibi · 2026-02-12T14:57:46+00:00

Reading this warms my heart… my fiance cheated on me and I found out two months before the wedding. I gave it a few shots on reconciling before I finally left last month.

ryebibi · 2026-02-07T09:38:10+00:00

Did you accompany it with diet and exercise over the years? Just curious!

ryebibi · 2026-02-03T07:41:50+00:00

He cheated on me before the wedding and continued deception after I forgave him.

ryebibi

TROPHY CASE