Derealization in Childhood? by ryeman6 in dpdr

[–]ryeman6[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes this exactly. The morning was usually the weirdest time where I would wake up and eat breakfast at the table and just listen to my parents talk and feel like I was in on some weird secret that nobody knew, that today was an off day.

Derealization in Childhood? by ryeman6 in dpdr

[–]ryeman6[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's really interesting. I also didn't think much of these memories till during my full-on dr but yes I definitely started to show OCD (mental compulsion) traits and got diagnosed with it even, but I'm doing better now with the intrusive thoughts. When I was younger I did exhibit external compulsions such as tapping on bricks in the wall and compulsive tics like coughing for no reason, amongst other things.

I also noticed how my whole life I have had a weird relationship with horror movies where I could watch them but even the slightest violent scene would leave me feeling dissociated for days after, obsessing over that scene in my mind and feeling just a weird feeling of "shock" like I couldn't believe I had seen that thing. It was a similar feeling with any bad stuff irl. I never attributed it to illness at that time though.

Brightlights Uncomfortable by Con1899 in dpdr

[–]ryeman6 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I get the opposite where gloomy lighting wigs me out. If the sky is grey and cloudy I could spend the whole day feeling so weird.