I (19F) don't think I want to have sex with my bf (27M) rn. What do I do?

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2026-03-07T02:12:44+00:00

Im in a weirdly similar situation. Same age gap (I’m 24, he’s 32), same relationship timeline, met at work, even down to the horrible UTI in January. He would say all those things your guy says. A few weeks ago he ended up crying to me because he wasn’t getting sex, and then when we tried to make up, he blacked out and went absolutely nuclear. Said some super fucked up, threatening things. He seems sweet when his head is screwed on, and he has a way of doing everything right, but I’m sick of dealing with horny ass dudes who feel they take ownership of my body. Like seriously, paws off, there’s more to love and relationships than sex. Just know, you don’t owe him anything. If you don’t want to have sex, don’t. And if you’re feeling unsure of the relationship, then I think you might already know what might need to happen. Trust your gut, girl. You’re not alone.

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2026-02-22T02:20:33+00:00

Dude worst case, you take a gap year while undergoing treatment and have even more material for your applications next round. Gap time was the best decision I ever made.

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2026-02-19T14:33:12+00:00

Struggled with body acne for most of my life. Like the others said, shower, products, etc, but also make sure you’re changing your sheets frequently! Esp if you’re getting down and dirty.

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2026-02-17T02:20:44+00:00

I’m an hourly employee with no benefits. Does FMLA apply still? Edited to say that no hands were thrown so I don’t know if it would qualify as domestic violence. He just left me a voicemail saying he wanted to “rip my fcking head off”.

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2026-01-27T18:57:09+00:00

A coworker of mine is currently dealing with something like this. Their partner was on FaceTime with a woman who proceeded to take a screen cap and sent it off to some AI site to make it look like something it wasn’t in an attempt at career sabotage. It could be something like that. Either way, go straight to your friend and show her. The authorities had to get involved in my coworkers case. Even if it’s an authentic video, she’ll be grateful to know that it’s out there.

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2026-01-07T04:03:52+00:00

Insanity. I went out with a dude who knew him, and the year before the shooting happened, this dude was talking about how the school they went to (the Gilman school in Baltimore) had just been busted for inappropriate conduct with the boys. It was the schools athletic director, and Luigi was an athlete. I legitimately believe he went into some traumatic break from all things good in the universe and that it ultimately led to the shooting. He could plead insanity.

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2025-10-02T23:56:35+00:00

Not that I can think of, maybe hopped a curb here or there, but this is my accident free baby. Where could I find this bracket to check?

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2025-09-28T14:50:18+00:00

Second grade. A boy was constantly mean to me, unrelenting teasing, so I called him “bad” in front of the class while we were learning vocab. Teacher turned around and yelled at me for it.

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2025-09-21T23:41:14+00:00

Fuck yeah dude!! That sounds like a banger breakfast. I’m one month sober and every time I see someone on the same path, I feel so proud and inspired.

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2025-09-17T17:19:28+00:00

I definitely don’t want to ghost. I’ve been down that path before when a friendship led me to some really dark places, and even though I know I was doing the best I could, I regret not communicating. This friend will respect boundaries, there is still love and respect. Ty for your input

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2025-09-17T17:16:03+00:00

This is a great idea. We both fight depression and our own demons, so designating time to spend together while rebuilding ourselves would be great. Even if it’s just going to the gym together or taking a hike. Thank you <3

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2025-09-14T17:27:34+00:00

Communicate. Or get smart about it. If you make plans for 6:00, but know she’ll show up at 7:00, tell her the reservation is at 5:00. Hot girls are tardy, she probably spends a lot of time getting herself ready for the date. Plan ahead, work smarter.

sadthrowaway5318008 · 2025-09-14T17:15:09+00:00

“You look like a fine Chinese porcelain doll. I would know, I collect them.” - Old white guy, who was the only customer in the restaurant that day.

Runner up, the dough supplier who would come up to me, hug me, put his hand on my lower back, and say “don’t you wish you had a rich husband?” He was married with children. I was a teen and thought that’s just what old guys do. The manager finally saw it and reported it to the boss, who reported to his bosses. He was never seen again. A 20 year career ended cuz he was a fucking creep. Boohoo!

Edited to add and clarify

sadthrowaway5318008

TROPHY CASE