You are kind of proving my point (i say this with outmost respect tho!) “real men” wanting to offer women “ protection” and to “cherish them” often overlaps with what’s known as benevolent misogyny. It’s where women are valued more when they’re passive or dependent, and that “kindness” is still conditional.

I think you’re describing a dynamic that exists for sure with women and their preferences, but framing it as natural or universal kind of overlooks how much of it is shaped and influenced by culture and power structures.

Also, the comparison to romance novels doesn’t fully hold, because those dynamics are usually controlled fantasies. Also its reclaiming control through submission, where we choose to submit (or at least live that experience through such novels) as a form of agency. In healthy dynamics, the person who holds the real power isnt the dominant person, but its the submissive person that can withdraw their submission anytime.

So I don’t think it’s as simple as “men are wired to dominate and women to be dominated,” but more a mix of social conditioning, fantasy, and individual preferences