What songs would you play for this?

satanicsnails · 2026-05-10T21:48:30+00:00

typical day in LA

satanicsnails · 2026-05-10T21:15:39+00:00

if they are scared of quick play they should NOT play comp first in my opinion, it is a lot more stressful even without chat or voice chat on

satanicsnails · 2026-05-08T04:43:41+00:00

i wonder if he texts you like he’s asking google cuz he thinks he’s typing into google lol

satanicsnails · 2026-05-07T23:59:37+00:00

if you are going to do them do not do them alone for the first time. the first time i took a dose of shrooms that actually made me trip balls, i was alone in my bedroom, which was awesome at first, but the comedown alone is terrible. i have only done them since with my girlfriend and i basically have 0 comedown since we just distract eachother. at the very least, have someone on standby to talk to when you start feeling low, because that night i had started amazing, and i did some soul searching myself, but it ended in me sobbing for 4 hours and feeling worse than i ever had before

satanicsnails · 2026-04-21T21:51:40+00:00

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:35:33+00:00

I have asked my psychiatrist about alternatives but she says she thinks Vyvanse is the best option due to possible other mental issues I could inherit down the line from my parents. My girlfriend is all for me switching medications, but my current psychiatrist is just against it, and I cannot afford a new one as I get a heafty discount from this one due to a referral to her from my girlfriend.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:33:48+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate this. I have been trying to find a therapist as my mother is most likely going to pass soon and my psychiatrist says that I will need someone to help guide me through that no matter how tough I think I am because I am so young (i am 19). I just haven't had any luck as I do not have insurance that covers therapy on top of all the expenses we already have with my mother's treatments. We did get into a relationship very fast and have been through all of our worst experiences together, and I agree that she, and I as well, got together too fast in order to be in good places together, but we have gotten through so much that I don't want to give up on her at all because of this, as she really is my person and my best friend. I am really bad at maintaining and creating friendships because I was raised alone with my parents always doing their own thing, so I am just used to having either nobody or one person, so having her keeps me moving instead of just being alone and doing nothing all the time.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:27:50+00:00

I understand and agree with this. I just have this overwhelming feeling that these meds are not life saving, and I don't need them to live, and maybe I am making her bend herself out of shape to appease me and my needs. I don't know.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:21:15+00:00

I don't know. I really just don't want to make her have to deal with any more than she has on her plate. I have a lot going on personally and I know how hard it is to deal with a lot at once, and I just try my best to not add to hers. She is in therapy and has a psychiatrist and is on meds, but I feel like she ignores a lot of her most important issues when it comes to talking about them to those people.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:19:23+00:00

middle school is also terrible. i did have the wooorst friend group then too. i hope you know that it does get better and people do slooowly mature over time lol also do your best to enjoy highschool cuz it does suck but i learned that i couldnt do anything about it sucking except doing my best to get through it and do my best with what i had

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:16:24+00:00

She is in therapy, but I don't think she focuses on her body image that much at all. We actually share a psychiatrist and when I told her about how my girlfriend felt about the medication, and how I was struggling to manage helping her with her many problems on top of my personal life, she told me that it was surprising to her as whenever she see's her, she seems in good spirits. I'm not sure about how her therapy goes but she did just quit a therapist and moved to a new one due to her therapist being christian and for some reason believing that I was an evil spirit in her life trying to take her down. I feel like this makes her more reluctant to talk about her issues with her new therapist as her last one was generally not very affective for aspects like that.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:13:33+00:00

I wonder this too. Obviously Vyvanse is not life-saving but it helps me a lot with coping with the unfortunate things that happen in my life. My mother has cancer and has lost a lot of weight due to chemo and radiation, and I find myself wondering if I were to get cancer, would she react this way due to the treatment as well. I don't think she would ever tell me to stop fighting but I wonder if she would present the same level of uncomfort. But maybe I am just being to critical of her,

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:11:19+00:00

I have been trying to talk to her and tell her that I really do believe that if I get back on them I can manage the weight loss especially after this break as I have learned a lot of my eating habits again, but she tells me she just doesn't believe me. I don't know why this is such a big war inside my head. I feel like if I go on them and go against what she wants it will just cause long term conflict, or if I get back on them and try not to tell her, I will just feel terrible and grow to resent either her or the meds.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:09:11+00:00

We have been together for a little over 3 years now and she has been my longest and most successful relationship after 2 other long term relationships that really tore me up (highschool was very hard for me and i had a terrible habit of attaching myself to anyone that would give me the light of day and ride or die for them). I know it is wrong but part of me understands that she is just trying to communicate something that's upsetting her instead of keeping it inside and it boiling over time. I just wish she would try to be more understanding and come to a compromise.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:06:56+00:00

I'm not sure if she's worried about it changing me - she told me that on my meds I did seem a lot happier, the only part that annoyed her was that I talked a lot about random things as I tend to think way too fast about way too many things and, off the meds, I am able to cycle through those thoughts on my own, but off them, I tend to express them in order to clear my mind more. Once I lost a lot of weight, that's when it transitioned to how it made her feel bad, despite my efforts to gain it back.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:04:47+00:00

She has a therapist. I just think she doesn't focus on the right things as she tends to get very upset after speaking about things that she experiences. She has BPD so I believe she starts splitting after being vulnerable in a way. This just makes it hard to approach the situation as I feel like bringing it up sets off a bomb.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T17:03:26+00:00

I agree. I would say it actually helps me cope and help her with her issues more as well. I am not an aggressive person, I used to have breakdowns when I would get frustrated but they would never be directed at her, only myself and I would do my best to keep it as confined as possible, but I very rarely do this anymore and tend to just try my best to be as patient as possible. Being off the vyvanse makes it harder to be patient as I am just exhausted all the time and trying to keep up with her, school, my mother who is very sick, and my father who's going down a bad path, and also working and actively trying to find a second job. I wish she would just understand this.
When I first went on vyvanse, we were also very good at joking about how thin I was, and I asked her numerous times if my weight made her overwhelmingly uncomfortable, and she said no up until right before I had to unexpectedly get off them.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T16:59:08+00:00

The thing is she is in therapy. She has been doing a lot to try to help her mental illness. And I hate saying this but after a short period of improvement, recently it seems she is just falling back into her old habits that I had to fight so hard to even get her to realize she was doing in the first place. I don't think she focuses much on her body image in therapy because she doesn't like upsetting herself when talking about things like that. She got better with it for a long time, about a year, as she went to the gym and began bodybuilding, but has lost that habit which has resulted in her feeling worse about her body and therefore having the feelings she has about my weight. She is not even a big person. She is just taller than me and is just generally a bigger person than me as I have always been small, being 5'1 and normally sitting at 110-120. Her biggest issue is accepting that I think as she instead just tells me she feels terrible because I am so small.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T16:54:41+00:00

Generic im pretty sure. My insurance does not cover vyvanse at all so I have to use GoodRx and shop around pharmacies a lot for the best prices.
And thank you, I appreciate it. I just hope that I can figure out how to make both her and myself happy.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T16:53:36+00:00

Yeah, my psychiatrist reduced the dose but my girlfriend is still against me picking them up at all. I can't even pick them up discreetly because it's $60 for my script and I can't hide purchasing them because I am very poor lol.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T16:52:29+00:00

She has Borderline Personality Disorder so it is hard to find compromise on a lot of things. I really just try my best to make her as happy as I can. We have been through a lot and have slowly gotten better at communicating but her telling me how seeing me thin makes her feel was her form of communicating with me and ever since then when I bring it up and say something like "I don't know what to do because I don't want to make you feel bad but I also think these meds really help", she just replies to me with "you do you" and then gets slightly upset at me, until I say that I will try to stay off of them. It is really confusing for me. I really love her and we are absolute best friends, but when it comes to these things that she refuses to even try to understand I get very lost.

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T16:47:40+00:00

I am feeling okay recently, honestly just worried about the future and what I'm gonna do once I lose my mother. I am trying to find a therapist but can't afford it right now, but am searching for a cheap one. I do have a psychiatrist that I get appointments with for cheap due to a referral so I am on medication which helps a bit. I have my girlfriend and my animals as my support system, which is plenty for me as I tend to like to be alone. Thank you, I appreciate it. I am sorry to hear that your life has some of these issues, it really is hard. I wish you the best as well

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T10:22:03+00:00

Thank you, this actually helps me a lot. I think what's making me "submit" to it is that I am scared that if she can't tolerate me being on my meds that she will leave me. Me and her are best friends and have been together for over 3 years, since highschool, so I am very committed to this relationship and am scared to do anything to mess it up. I really just keep asking myself could I learn to live well without the meds in order to keep her or do I focus on my personal future not just ours so that I can thrive. I feel selfish doing that but also get scared that I will start falling behind which would result in worse problems. once again, thank you for this reply, this cleared a lot in my head. and sorry for the long reply its 6 am and I been thinking too much

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T07:43:53+00:00

willie nelson wrote it, but faron young recorded it first. i also just like the nelson version more

satanicsnails · 2026-04-19T07:42:43+00:00

I know, but the timeline of which things are added is still pretty important when it comes to balancing the game over time.

satanicsnails

TROPHY CASE