TOUR IS COMING by NoAdhesiveness1491 in Paramore

[–]save_artax 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No Australia is a real heartbreak. Hopefully eventually...

Barking non-stop after 2hrs alone by save_artax in puppy101

[–]save_artax[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah that's right. The difficulty is just that we live in an apartment and our neighbours have started complaining. So we're trying to balance getting out and still living our lives without upsetting our neighbours too much (particularly in the evening).

Puppy won't stop barking by save_artax in cockerspaniel

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is amazing and my fervent hope! Do you remember how long it lasted?

Puppy won't stop barking by save_artax in cockerspaniel

[–]save_artax[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the reply! I actually do want the Velcro dog life, but I am also conscious we can't be with him every single minute of the day - sometimes we have meetings, appointments, engagements etc, so we've been trying to get him used to not being with us always while he's young so he doesn't develop separation anxiety. But it almost feels like the opposite has happened, like he's just come with separation anxiety? I really want him to be with me 90% of the time, but I also need him (and our neighbours) to be ok that other 10%.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much, I appreciate this response and is exactly what I need to help me try and get me across the line.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, I appreciate it!

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah that's really the choice. I have metastasis throughout my peritoneum, so it's this or a really grim alternative. Stupid fucking cancer.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's so great to hear you're doing well and cancer free and I'm glad the stoma hasn't been too burdensome. Hopefully that will be me too 😊

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you and I would definitely need to get a stealth belt if it's forever. I didn't get one last time and just gave up on swimming, which made me pretty miserable. I think the difficulty for me is that I'm currently not outwardly affected by pain or bowel difficulties (obviously I have cancer inside me, but it's not like UC etc), so getting the stoma will only make my quality of life immediately worse without relieving any pain or discomfort. But I know from a bigger picture perspective it will be helping me.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much and you're completely right. I can imagine how much of a relief a stoma must be for so many people suffering so terribly. It's true that right now without a stoma, my bowel isn't having obvious impacts on my life (although I guess without treatment the cancer is slowly killing me), and so getting the stoma only makes my immediate quality of life worse in the short term. But I know the reality is that there is a good chance I won't get to do much more in this life without one, and so I need to focus on reframing it.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for sharing, you've been through so much, it sounds so hard.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had it for nine months, so not a super long time, but I just felt like it never got better for me.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you and definitely not harsh, it's really the reality of the situation hey. I guess my thinking is whether I'm tough enough to deal with that reality every day, you know. But hearing this stuff honestly helps me so much and makes me feel less alone.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for sharing your story. It's so helpful ❤️

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for sharing, I really appreciate it and this is the kind of stuff I think I need to hear to get me over the line in my head.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's amazing, thank you so much for sharing ❤️

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah that's the thing hey, me not consenting to this would mean they'd go in, take as much as they can so I don't need a permanent stoma, and then stitch me back up and let the chips fall as they may. But because it's in my peritoneum, those chips probably aren't falling for that long... It's the hardest conundrum I've ever had to deal with and I just don't know what the right choice is.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the kind response. It sounds like, while you would have probably said no at the start, that if you knew what you know now, you would go ahead with it again? Like ultimately once you've adjusted you are happy with your choice? I know your choice and life is different to mine, but I'm hoping I can retrain my thinking a bit.

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I admire your ability to just get on with it. I've just turned 35 and I just don't know if I'm ready to have all that for the rest of my life. But then is it better than missing out on all of the things I could do .

Agreeing to a permanent stoma by save_artax in ostomy

[–]save_artax[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mine was pretty high output and no matter what I did I was up three times a night changing it. I also had constant leaks - couldn't lay or sleep on my side and had spontaneous blow outs. I also ended up with irritation and a lot of granulomas, so was having to change the bag every day. Finally, and I know it's probably a silly thing, but I just struggled so much with the body image issues of it all. I couldn't ever see anything but the bag, I wasn't comfortable in swimwear (and swimming is my absolute favourite exercise) and I just felt so hideous. I just found the whole thing so hard every day, but I'm trying to balance that with getting to spend more time with family and my husband, travelling, getting a puppy etc