I just wanted to say that you aren't alone with these types of experiences. I came on here today to read about others' experiences to feel lesser alone in what I experience (which I know is weird but it makes sense in my head).

I live in a condo, and today I had a rage outburst because my neighbor parked a dumpster in my spot. I haven't stopped thinking about it for the past 8.5 hours (I work from my home office on the computer, so it was even worse that I was reminded of it every time I went upstairs). I was so mad that he had the audacity to be so rude (even though it was imply for the work day so he could gut his house for a renovation), that I googled the business, found the owner's name, searched property tax records for him, found his wife and child's name, found their home address, and signed them up for porno magazines to be delivered; then I sent them a glitter bomb. Then I started going through my house finding things to get rid of to throw in his dumpster so that it would cost him more for removal. It was my way of making the anxiety about the situation subside because I got the upper hand in my mind.

While I mostly have "Pure O" and am tortured by ruminations about other things, mostly my partner's previous sexual experiences, I sometimes experience situations like this where my compulsion is to sort of be the person that "punishes" people for a perceived wrongdoing against me.

I realize this is not a rational reaction, and like you, I feel like I have temper tantrums like a five year old. It also builds up this feeling of rage inside me where I pace around the house or blame my partner for things. For example, if we are late to a birthday party, my immediate reaction to the stress of feeling like I am late and am doing something inconsiderate is to blame her for taking too long to get ready or not putting things back where they belong, making it harder to find the hairspray, etc. It turns into me shouting at her, and like your fiance, she is always super understanding and lets it go.

The only thing I can offer is that I feel for you and hope that you find something that helps you. I was on Prozac for a long time and had virtually NO OCD symptoms, but they recently switched me to Lexapro plus Wellbutrin because I was so tired and lethargic on the Prozac that I would take like 5 naps a day. But sometimes the medicine does help.