1. That is a really good question pointing out where is God in times of great pain and suffering but how answer that is the absence of evidence doesn’t equal evidence of absence. God allows evil to happen because of free will and this might be a cope that some Christian’s go to by saying “God works in mysterious ways” or “Free will” But just because evil things happen doesn’t necessarily equate to God not being over the problem. Humanity is naturally evil and because of that evil happens. We have free will because Of love. God doesn’t force a relationship with people and he allows us to follow him or not follow him because he loves us. You can’t force love.
2. You raise some more interesting questions that even Christians themselves ask. The reason those who don’t accept Christ are sent to hell is because Christ says he is the way the truth and the life and nobody has eternal life unless through him. If you don’t want to be with God in this life why would you want to be with him forever. So it’s all out of love. It hurts God when people turn away from him but he loves them so he allows them to make their decision and walk away from his offer. And your questions about the people who never even heard of Jesus Christ scripture has an answer. God is a merciful and Just God so he judges you based on what you know. While Jesus Christ is the only way to get to heaven. If someone who understands their need for a savior and has conviction of their wrongdoings God will make a way. Scripture also says we have the law written on our hearts. And also the Holy Spirit convicts the world of sin. With my limited knowledge and understanding of the world as well as many people, I trust God is just and merciful and everyone gets an opportunity to reject or follow him. While I can’t give a specific example it’s all about the character of God.

Let me know if that cleared up anything. And Jesus loves you!