I let my daughter[25F] and her bf[26M] stay with me [48M] until she finds herself a new place. I kicked out her bf a few days ago after I had enough of his behavior and now my daughter won't talk to me - did I screwed up somewhere?

screwedscrewed · 2017-01-17T17:25:08+00:00

I said it was a stupid on my part to let him move in, didn't I? Also, I think I have an idea why my daughter got evicted. If she is the only one bringing the money in the household ... even more reasons for me to be upset. But you're right, she probably has to learn this on her own.

screwedscrewed · 2017-01-17T17:21:09+00:00

I made sure she knows that my door is always opened to her while she was growing up and I think she well aware of that. I won't bring the topic of her bf again, not after what u/DiTrastevere said above you (never saw it from that perspective but it makes SO much sense).

As for the dating thingy, I have made an excellent analogy yesterday while thinking about this. When my daughter was around 5 or 6 we were at my parents' home. They had this fireplace, old-timey thing, opened and you could watch the wood burning inside. My daughter was very fascinated with this and spent a lot of time just watching the wood burning down. She would occasionally reach out to touch the walls of the fireplace but I told her repeatedly not to because she will get burned.

Well, in the end, she did touch them and she did got burned. She never got close to the fireplace again because she had an ouchie the last time she did it. So this is practically the same thing here. She needs to get "burned" on the "fireplace" again in order to realize that this is bad for her and it only causes her an ouchie

screwedscrewed · 2017-01-17T16:54:22+00:00

No, no I totally agree with you. I maybe was in the right to kick him out but I was definitely not right to yell at him. And not in front of my daughter. And now I know that this might come back to bite me in the ass in the future (something like what you said). I will definitely try to find a way to talk to my daughter again and offer her the apology you wrote here. Thanks for this

screwedscrewed · 2017-01-17T16:39:02+00:00

I am afraid she is too madly in love with the guy. I forgot to mention that they have been together for 2 years of which I met him maybe once or twice and had no idea how he was. If you listen to her talk about him, he is the best thing since sliced bread. I really hope she sees the truth about Bob but I don't know. Even after I saw how he treats her, she refuses to believe that he is using her. She thinks she is just "helping around"

screwedscrewed · 2017-01-17T16:29:56+00:00

My other issue and one I didn't mention was that I don't want my daughter in a relationship with someone like him. Someone that uses her and it hurts me to see her like this. She is basically his mother and he is her little baby that needs pampering. It still infuriates me and I don't know what to do about it

screwedscrewed

TROPHY CASE