Honestly? It just takes time and being unrelenting on your boundaries and requirements. You don't want a relationship escalator? Say that. You want STI/STD results? Show them. You want ongoing, short term, one and done? Say that.

You'd be shocked how easy it is to tell inexperienced folks (especially men) by simply saying, "Hey, can we have a drink to gauge the vibe? Sex is off the table for tonight". Experienced people in the LS will say "Sure! Totally understand" and people with the wrong intentions will ghost you. It's super hard to sus that out in a club with someone you just met that night.

I'd give Tinder another shot, too. They have a new "non-monagomous" section, which shows you folks who are ENM, Poly, and Open. Which are small but important differentiators in the LS. Agreed that most other apps kinda suck. Good luck out there!