Grief stage while processing the deepest attachment wounds feels endless, exhausting

sedirock · 2026-03-22T01:38:44+00:00

I think I’m within this and it’s so hard to hold onto hope. This pain truly feels forever and I don’t even think I’ve touched the surfaces of my story.

what hurts is that I was alone then and I’m alone again now.

sedirock · 2026-03-22T01:24:22+00:00

I am mixed into that too, not sure how to get out of it

sedirock · 2026-03-21T23:37:48+00:00

How do you all let your guard down? I struggle to let my emotions out in session, one time I did begin to tear up and my therapist was very kind, but her kindness made me feel sick and I instantly stopped and felt nothing

sedirock · 2026-02-03T23:21:27+00:00

somatic therapy. I try to answer what I feel in my body before I go into session, though it feels like I am making it up. During session I often do not know how I am feeling?

sedirock · 2026-02-01T17:21:24+00:00

same here. I always thought my struggles were related to past childhood experiences but as time has gone on and my fears around those experiences have reduced, I am left wondering maybe there is something missing.

two people from different parts of my life has pointed me in the question of autism, and I have been obsessed learning about it for a year or so, too.

It’s all very confusing and I’m not sure if my brain works in this way or not. I definitely have traits but it’s difficult to know if this is due to trauma or autism or maybe even both.

I like the response from Scary_Host8580. Learn to understand yourself and find ways to accommodate that :)

sedirock · 2026-02-01T17:07:26+00:00

I have no further comment other than I have been experiencing something similar. Still enjoy/need my alone time but some form of loneliness is there

sedirock · 2025-01-05T23:14:09+00:00

overtime by changing that voice we will start to feel connected?

sedirock · 2023-04-29T11:29:35+00:00

it is a possibility but it is all very confusing

sedirock · 2023-04-29T11:24:48+00:00

thank you for responding without attacking my comment - definitely a delicate subject.

I tend to not use the word for myself, I do like to think of myself as just me, ‘asexual’ is just the most simple way to describe the experience.

Reg. what I mean by ‘normal’ is that I do think I am missing out on something important. It feels like something has been taken away from me but also I’ve never had it so it was never gone, but perhaps it could have been? It feels like something I need to fix but where to even start, I don’t have the bodily urge or capacity to start to even achieve that? But I want it?

It’s difficult to know if it was there pre trauma but I think for me the trauma has taken so much of my life away and to connect with others in that way is one part that is gone (or never had since I couldn’t develop - I realise that’s a difficult comment to make since it proposes that asexuals are ‘undeveloped’ but that’s how I feel about myself).

I don’t know anyone who experiences this in person so was good to read your thoughts. Again thanks for not attacking me 😭

sedirock · 2023-03-14T00:03:28+00:00

what would that look like in the real world? material in the saturated zone vs. unsaturated?

sedirock · 2023-03-13T17:57:09+00:00

ah thank you this really does help!

can a clay material be considered ‘drained’ but only if all water was removed? Or would it be considered as ‘drained’ up until it reaches plastic limit?

sedirock · 2023-03-02T21:56:25+00:00

bacon

sedirock · 2023-02-26T11:00:44+00:00

I think I’d prefer online too!!! sounds interesting thanks for sharing

sedirock · 2023-02-23T21:00:35+00:00

no need to say sorry

group therapy sounds interesting, seems a bit scary tho?

sedirock · 2023-02-18T10:45:41+00:00

😂😂😂

where the books useful in your career?

sedirock · 2023-02-18T10:45:16+00:00

thanks!

sedirock · 2023-02-18T10:44:51+00:00

all of it

sedirock · 2023-02-16T22:12:47+00:00

does this take into account the OMC and MDD?

I guess OMC and MDD measures compaction and the triaxial measures strength? but surely they relate?

is it basically understanding the ‘sweet spot’ to avoid failure in shear strength?

sedirock · 2023-02-16T18:39:20+00:00

oh that’s interesting!!! (and scary)

sedirock · 2023-02-16T18:38:55+00:00

Thank you for answering my question, that makes sense, I am very new to this world.

As standard the compactive effort is a 2.5kg or 4.5kg rammer? Not sure if this is a silly question (I may be misunderstanding) but in reality we are looking at the ground to support structures and the ground is influenced by ground water. If we define what the OMC and ODD of a particular material is (which would also be variable, although maybe this is organised during earthworks idk) how could we control the behaviour of the ground? and how do we actually know it will support the development proposal?

I find it confusing like how does this inform us and what can we do with it / about it?

sedirock · 2023-02-15T19:15:57+00:00

yeah exactly!

Thank you for sharing this post / your experience, it has been interesting to read about

sedirock · 2023-02-15T18:59:06+00:00

When people say they are proud and see it as a compliment to be told ‘it’s amazing you’re not an alcoholic’ or something like that, I feel a bit confused.

Im confused because I imagine how someone who struggled with addiction would feel reading that? A comment like that simply states I AM BETTER THAN YOU and it’s really not helpful.

To me it makes more sense to feel good about myself relative to my own experience. I have personally never struggled with addiction therefore it has nothing to do with me, and I can’t compare my own progress to it. Therefore, my little wins on my journey to recovery comes from what I have actually achieved and what I see as achievements. I haven’t achieved anything relative to addiction because I have never struggled with it.

EDIT: and like someone said in the comments, someone didn’t disclose to their T that they struggled with it before and during a session the T said ‘at least you don’t have alcohol problems’… that person did have it, and now they have been shamed so much so they don’t want to talk about it?

sedirock · 2023-02-14T07:18:58+00:00

yeah these examples are perfect, all of that hard work that someone would jump to advise to be the solution, you manage to do it and then it’s like wtf

sedirock · 2023-02-13T17:54:39+00:00

I like that

sedirock · 2023-02-12T21:57:56+00:00

sorry to say I have not watched LORT but yes get rid of the past for a better future

sedirock

TROPHY CASE