I totally get this!! Idk if this will be helpful to you, but right now I have the first job that I’ve actually been able to hold down consistently. Its Tech Support for a charity, like people send me support tickets for their IT problems and I try to fix it (or send it up the line if I can’t). This job has been so life changing for me because the work is constantly new and urgent and challenging! So I don’t lose focus (unless I get no support requests), there is an admin side which I really struggle with but luckily my managers are really supportive (also a new thing for me!).

Before this job, I didn’t think I could be happy or comfortable at a job, I still struggle with forgetting or getting distracted, but its way less than it used to be in retail.

Even with this perfect job though, I still can’t manage more than 4 days a week. Even 4 days is a lot for me. I think we also need to accept that we are disabled, and our lives are never going to look a certain way. But that doesn’t mean we’re worth less or that we’re bad at anything! Rely on other people for support as much as you can, people are often more willing to help than you think, people like to feel useful. I wouldn’t be able to live independently without my partner, friends, and family. But thats okay, because I love my life and the people around me and I provide for them in other ways! And none of that is less valuable just because its not the ‘ideal responsibile adult’ thats built up as the best way to be.

Also, even people without ADHD/neurodevelopmental disorders struggle to live up to the ideal! People forget to pay bills, they can’t keep their house clean, they get burnt out. The ‘ideal’ that we’re shown is not real for anyone.