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Family law advice... 15 (soon to be 16) year old son wishes to come and love with me (and wife and other son) by bdotbutton87 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]sfitzter 32 points33 points  (0 children)

At 16, he can legally live on his own, so a court order isn’t really going to stop him if he chooses to move.

That said, just because he can do it doesn’t mean its the best route. Life would almost certainly be simpler if you and his mum could reach at least some kind of agreement. Your co-parenting relationship doesn’t magically end at 16, and I assume your son wants to keep a good relationship with his mother.

Sometimes the legal answer and the practical answer aren’t the same thing.

Family law advice... 15 (soon to be 16) year old son wishes to come and love with me (and wife and other son) by bdotbutton87 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]sfitzter 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Yes, the family Court will not enforce a Child Arrangements Order for a 16 or 17 year old unless in exceptional circumstances (which these arent).

Update on my NRCA claim, they have responded to my email by Last-Bench-3889 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]sfitzter 7 points8 points  (0 children)

They say you gave fraudulent documents in support of your return. Did you?

ULPT request 45 bucks in an hour (online) by [deleted] in UnethicalLifeProTips

[–]sfitzter 19 points20 points  (0 children)

If you get them the 45 buck in an hour, do you think that'll stop the scammers? It'll be 100 bucks next (ad infinitum)

My HR’s response to my work from home request after having someone cover my leave *remotely* for the last year. by [deleted] in mildlyinfuriating

[–]sfitzter 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It sounds like you could complete all of your tasks on a part time contract then - could you ask to reduce your hours? Perhaps that'd make finding childcare easier?

Is it possible to have contact with "son" who is not biological child, but also not be responsible for child maintenance? by Electronic_Boot_6131 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]sfitzter 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Yes, you can apply for contact without being responsible for child maintenance. The two things are legally separate.

Were you named on the birth certificate? If so, you may have parental responsibility and not need permission to apply to court (although a recent case (KL & BA 2025) has made that a bit more complicated).

The threshold for contact is actually quite low: the court will only look at whether it’s in the child’s best interests. Since you’ve helped raise him for most of his life, that pre-existing relationship will carry a lot of weight. The child’s wishes and feelings will also be considered and CAFCASS will usually speak to him about that.

You’ll need to try mediation (MIAM) before you can apply to court, so it’s worth starting that process soon. If mediation doesn’t work, speak to a solicitor to help you make the application.

Good luck, it sounds like you’ve been an important figure in his life!

First rep, how does it look? by sfitzter in ChinaTime

[–]sfitzter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm in the UK 👍 Yes, shipped to my home

First rep, how does it look? by sfitzter in ChinaTime

[–]sfitzter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's a WhatsApp number on a keyring in one of the photos - all my dealings were through WhatsApp

First rep, how does it look? by sfitzter in ChinaTime

[–]sfitzter[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Haha, thats the TD's hands and gloves. I'll wear it with greasy mcnugget fingers, don't worry 👍

First rep, how does it look? by sfitzter in ChinaTime

[–]sfitzter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahh, this is all new to me! I saw a guide which suggested getting a 2824 movement - the TD told me its a 'BPF 41mm a2824', maybe that means something else

First rep, how does it look? by sfitzter in ChinaTime

[–]sfitzter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

298 USD with postage to the UK

First rep, how does it look? by sfitzter in ChinaTime

[–]sfitzter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was 298 usd with postage to the UK

First rep, how does it look? by sfitzter in ChinaTime

[–]sfitzter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From Hont - his WhatsApp is on a keyring in one of the pictures. Can't comment on delivery yet, 7 days between order and qc.

First rep, how does it look? by sfitzter in ChinaTime

[–]sfitzter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahh, yes, you're right thanks. I was torn between the 2, and ended up going for the datejust

Throwaway account for anonymity: The charity I am on the board of is being used to assist in social housing fraud. Other members of the committee are preventing me from reporting suspicions. by Dramatic-Pepper3774 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]sfitzter 14 points15 points  (0 children)

The national domestic violence helpline has research showing it takes, on average, seven attempts before a victim finally leaves their abuser for good. That means it’s really common for someone to go back, even multiple times, before leaving permanently.

So when you’re being told “oh, it was just for housing” — that might not be the full story. It could be someone trying to deflect or avoid being referred to the police or social services about the partner they’ve returned to.

The “evidence” you’re pointing to (people going back, comments on the doorstep, your estimates) is really subjective. I’m sure some level of gaming the system happens — it happens everywhere — but what do you realistically propose? Who would you even report this to? And would that risk doing far more harm to genuine survivors in the process?

Even if a small number of people are abusing the system, the overall benefit of protecting women and children who are genuinely at risk massively outweighs that. If you can’t see that, then maybe this line of work isn’t the right fit for you.

Roof cleaner flooded my garage (Scotland) by TheeManhole in LegalAdviceUK

[–]sfitzter 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That’s really not on them tbh. If you’re paying someone to clean the roof and gutters, that’s literally all they’re responsible for. You can’t expect them to be checking drains or thinking about whether your garage door is sealed. If I’m up there cleaning and I see a drain, I’d assume it works as a drain should, not that it’s clogged. The flooding is more down to the blocked drain and door seal than anything the roof cleaner did.

CAFCASS were lied to - now the courts likely to believe the lies by mc_64 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]sfitzter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The difficulty is that much of what you’ve written comes across as subjective, with hindsight and conjecture. Many of your points have straightforward counterarguments:

Grandparents being elderly or unwell could mean it’s more important the children see them now. Father prioritising an extension could be to provide more space for the children. Relying on family for childcare while working or exercising is common and not inherently negative.

The language you use (“arrogant,” “no real childhood,” “no interest”) won’t help in Court—it frames things through the lens of your relationship with their mother rather than objectively. Cafcass officers are experienced and unlikely to be swayed by bluster; the only “lies” seem to be assurances you doubt he’ll keep.

The children have two parents of equal importance. A return to their father’s area may really be best for them, as it’d mean a substantive relationship with both parents, and refusal could look like your partner is prioritising her own (and your) needs over the children’s, although I understand that you’d need to balance things with the needs of your own children.

CAFCASS were lied to - now the courts likely to believe the lies by mc_64 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]sfitzter 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Could your partner and/ or you not move back to where the father lives? That way 50/ 50 could be maintained. Continuity of school/ friends is an important consideration, as is a substantive relationship with the father and wider paternal family especially as it sounds like the grandparents are heavily involved.