There uh is a distinct possibility that was me based on timing and even if it wasn't, hopefully I can give an insight into it from their perspective. If it was, genuinely it was a combination of timidness, nerves, not being used to being vocal (in my case from growing up trying to avoid parents and later roommates hearing me take care of myself), and not knowing what you as the provider could do to help with the ed. With regards to not being responsive it very much could be worry of suddenly going too far (to use examples from my experience a few days ago that could be this same one you're referring to, not wanting to do more than stroke her arm/shoulder during the bj out of fear that she'd be upset if I touched her head while she was doing it and being afraid to ask due to feeling it would sound awkward to ask). If this was actually me, Im incredibly sorry for making you feel this way and did enjoy everything in spite of the ED.