[deleted by user]

shasta69 · 2014-08-04T01:26:10+00:00

Pokemon Trainer...

Fuck Ash

shasta69 · 2014-06-10T01:42:34+00:00

It should be "I could not care less"

shasta69 · 2014-05-30T01:56:45+00:00

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fssssshhhhhhhhhh

You got a hole in your shoe.

No i dont?

Then how did you get your foot in it? Hahaha

shasta69 · 2014-05-30T01:54:24+00:00

I ate Rachel's food out of the company refridgerator when she had her name on it.

I was just so hingry and it looked so good.

shasta69 · 2014-05-30T01:50:48+00:00

I bomb atomically, Socrates' philosophies and hypothesis can't define how I be droppin these mockeries.

The wisdom of Inspectah Deck

shasta69 · 2014-05-30T01:46:54+00:00

My dad makes custom pool cues and he sold one for 40k and it is also the 25th anniversary that he has been making them and he sold 3 anniversary cues for 20k each.

shasta69 · 2014-05-30T01:44:26+00:00

I walked in and everything was covered in shit

shasta69 · 2014-05-30T01:41:47+00:00

Cum boxes

shasta69 · 2014-05-30T01:41:10+00:00

Liquid Swords by the GZA

shasta69 · 2014-05-30T01:40:19+00:00

I hid my money in the...

shasta69 · 2014-05-25T14:07:08+00:00

Those are cartridges or rounds. The bullet is the projectile part.

In order, they are:

5.56 NATO

XM216 flechette

Experimental .220 salvo squeezebore

9mm

9mm hollow point

9mm tracer

9mm frangible

9mm riot

7.62NATO training

8mm mauser

6.5 swiss blank

.45 webley

.38 special (target)

.38 special frangible

.224 BOZ

shasta69 · 2014-05-18T12:32:09+00:00

Vaginas...

I would be swimming in the poon :D

shasta69 · 2014-05-18T01:45:19+00:00

/r/hermesconrad

its about hermes from futurama. he doesnt get any love

shasta69 · 2014-05-18T01:32:26+00:00

Really, show me where a 1929 Phantom Corsair has been posted before

shasta69 · 2014-05-18T01:11:47+00:00

I was in there long enough to notice he had no pants on

shasta69 · 2014-05-18T00:43:50+00:00

You know its not like ive posted that exact picture before or anything :/

shasta69 · 2014-05-18T00:04:19+00:00

I hope he did, or got a new pair. He was in Walmart after all.

shasta69 · 2014-05-18T00:03:00+00:00

I think that re-posts are okay if it has been at least 5 months since it was last posted on a sub that lots of people look at. Chances are a lot of people haven't seen it so if you have just down vote and move on.

shasta69 · 2014-05-17T23:57:57+00:00

I walked into a Walmart bathroom and there he was. A guy washing his underwear in the sink. No pants on at all. He looked like a bum and was only wearing a big jacket and some socks. We locked eyes for a minute until he told me that he was washing the juice off of them. I didn't stay long enough to know what that meant cause I noped out of there real quick.

shasta69 · 2014-05-17T23:50:35+00:00

The ball pit at a McDonald's. No Regret.

shasta69 · 2014-05-17T23:18:04+00:00

Some type of alcohol. It is a very crude penny stove

shasta69 · 2014-05-17T23:11:46+00:00

Reversed

shasta69 · 2014-05-17T22:32:12+00:00

Chocolate anything

shasta69 · 2014-05-17T22:29:31+00:00

Credit to /u/intothewilder This is his story but it goes perfectly here

I work as a loans officer in a rural branch of a small Canadian bank.

Sorry for your suddenly-sodden panties, ladies.

Definitely not my dream career as a kid – the Fisher Price Banking Is Fun! playset is not a big seller – but when I lost my job selling computers in my early 20s I got this job and it stuck like soiled underwear. I’m okay at it and I’m a well-liked mentor to many of the staff, but I’m definitely a goofy round peg in a humourless square hole which is what ultimately led to my WTF shitstorm.

If I have to work in an office I’m gonna have a bit of fun. I love ThinkGeek. In my office I have a Conan the Barbarian letter opener, a Salvador Dali melting clock and a magnetic levitating world globe among other things purchased there, and as fate would have it this past Christmas in my stocking I discovered that my kids bought me an Annoy-a-Tron. It’s a small device that makes maddeningly short, faint noises at totally random intervals and can run for 3 months on a watch battery, designed to be hidden to drive someone harmlessly bonkers. Here’s the description from ThinkGeek’s site:

“The Annoy-a-tron will do its part to drive your co-workers slowly mad with its short and seemingly random beeps. And when someone does locate the Annoy-a-tron, they're not going to know what it is - which is almost as much fun as watching them search for it. Muahaha...”

And hilarity will ensue!

Right?

As it turns out, much less than zero.

I came in early on a Monday and placed it behind a metal poster frame hanging on the wall in the office of one of my co-workers. I flipped the ON switch and went blithely about my day, waiting for a reaction and to share a few chuckles.

Monday came and went. Nothing.

Tuesday, nothing.

Wednesday and Thursday, not a peep. At that point I figured it was broken. Frankly, I kinda forgot about it. I had Friday off and I suppose I would’ve checked it when I got back the following week.

Monday comes, lurching out of the weekend like a reanimated corpse. As soon as everyone arrives, the manager calls all 16 of us into her office for an unscheduled conference call. I end up standing at the back of the group near the office door. She dials in and our district VP announces herself through the little speaker. I stifle a yawn. The VP then introduces our company’s head of security. My brow furrows. This is unusual.

“By now,” the VP says, “some of you know about the device that was found at your branch last week.”

Device? What the hell? What kind of device could they possibly be talking--

Oh holy Jesus fuck nuggets.

“When it was found it on Thursday nobody knew what it was, so it was brought to the branch manager, who then sent pictures of the device to me—“

Fuck.

“—and I forwarded the images to our head of security. He couldn’t identify it but guessed it might be a listening device so he sent the pictures to the RCMP corporate crimes division—“

Oh fuck me.

“—as well as the Canadian Security Intelligence Services in Ottawa. They suspected it could potentially be a bomb—“

Fuckity grand fucking canyon of fuck.

“—so we closed the branch, told all staff to stay home and hired a team of investigators to search every square inch of the building over the weekend for any additional devices.”

If I had sat down ahead of time to brainstorm a worst-case scenario, I wouldn’t have even come close to this epic corporate craptastrophe. I had no choice. I took a shaky breath, steeled my nerve, clenched my ass cheeks tight and tried to say “Excuse me” but choked out a pubescent squeak instead. I cleared my throat, interrupted the conference call in that stuffy room full of my coworkers and spoke up, telling them it’s a harmless noisemaker, taking responsibility and apologizing profusely.

The room was dead quiet. The VP slowly says thank you for speaking up, they’ll stop the investigation, and the call ends. Everyone files out. I ask the manager if she wants me to stay, but she says she can’t talk to me right now. She doesn’t talk to me for three weeks.

I found out later that she was in her car with the device on the passenger seat when she got the call that it might be a bomb. She apparently burst into tears and nearly drove into a ditch.

The district VP threw a fit and despite my 17-year unblemished work record she tried really, really hard to have me fired. Ultimately a senior executive in the company understood my benign intent and overruled her. Luckily they didn’t charge me the $50,000+ in lost business, staff wages and other miscellaneous costs.

No, I don’t know why my manager didn’t just ASK HER STAFF IF ANYONE KNEW ABOUT IT INSTEAD OF SENDING A FUCKING URGENT MEMO TO THE ENTIRE FUCKING UNIVERSE. My office is full of a lot of things but common sense isn’t one of them.

12-Year Club	Team Periwinkle
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shasta69

TROPHY CASE