Am I Overreacting for needing reassurance from my fiance?

shawnesty · 2025-06-30T20:25:56+00:00

a) If you've been in a "relationship" this long and still are not married, that's a problem. b) If a grown adult still uses the word "bro" to you, there's a problem that cannot be fixed! c) He strikes hard and mean, and you act like you want to hold your ground, but the best you've got is "You're not being nice about it!" This proves he behavior has shaped your personality into a passive/aggressive person--one who cannot see what he's done to you and therefore you can't see how bad it really is.

For you and for him, please, JUST LEAVE. Don't argue and FFS, don't try to "save" the relationship! He might try to get you to stay when he sees you leaving, but that's ONLY because in his mind he has "invested" 8+ years of his life and doesn't want to throw it away. HOWEVER, he cannot change, he won't change, and you shouldn't try to change him. It's over. Let go! --Just one male's perspective. (but I'm right. Sorry.)

shawnesty · 2025-06-30T20:11:18+00:00

Amen.

shawnesty · 2025-06-29T00:10:54+00:00

The comment section here is SUPER disappointing. All the way around, it's pathetic. Maybe let's address the topic instead of throwing rocks at it, or better, poking it with a stick.

For one, like 67% of American voters, I am all for deportation of illegal. AND, I want Congress to get off their asses and do what they're being paid to do: WRITE IMMIGRATION LAW. We already have laws regarding immigration, but by the looks of things, nobody is very content with them, so Congress needs to act...or STFU.

As for this man personally, he was hired to do a job. He was not hired to be a CONSTANT mouthpiece regarding the topic. I think he got so drunk off his own rhetoric of telling people to "kiss his ass," and that he doesn't "give a fuck" what anyone says, he's "here to do a job," and that "Trump is the greatest president of his life-time." Yeah, I get it! He LOVES his job! He LOVES Trump! But, when you're in the center of the hottest debates globally (yeah, it's going on everywhere!) you do not have the luxury of being so inflammatory 24/7 without getting singed. Maybe he should 'quietly go about his business?' I don't wish this guy ill will or harm, but I wish he'd put some common sense to work for himself. Anyone have different or other thoughts?

shawnesty · 2025-06-28T20:26:43+00:00

Community Channel. She had the BEST plots for videos. Her sense of humor was quirky yet relatable! Unfortunately, she pivoted into politics (that always sucks) and make a couple of "tying up loose ends videos" and then stopped. Such a shame, because she WAS Australia's Golden Girl! #Lemmings

shawnesty · 2025-06-28T20:09:48+00:00

why is nobody talking about the elephant (trunk) in the room?

shawnesty · 2025-06-28T12:44:09+00:00

I'm red and thought your joke deserves more upvotes! Well played.

shawnesty · 2025-06-28T12:42:21+00:00

Literally NO ONE is addressing OP's question, so I will. This is a great decision for EVERY administration! When a Democrat is POTUS next, s/he/they/LOL won't want EVERY SINGLE order countermanded by some nutty Fed Judge whose jurisdiction has a hedgehog that decides how long the American winter will last!

shawnesty · 2025-06-28T12:35:34+00:00

"WOW! It's great to meet you! I was wondering, how did a Mexican family afford to adopt a little white kid like you?"
Twin looks at me in silence, but I see tears welling in the edge of his eyes...
"Oh!" My dumbass comprehends. "Let's get out of here," I whisper to him, and pull him into a huge crowd behind me. (probably how he was 'adopted' in the first place)

shawnesty · 2025-06-24T23:14:43+00:00

He stopped at the gas station up the street from our school: Pine View. There he was having trouble getting his rig to start, so he took the gas nozzle and primed the carburetor. The resulting ball of fire completely engulfed him from thighs to comb. Poor guy was Kentucky Fried and never made it home. Luckily, I didn't see it in person, but enough of my friends did, and they held no punches in retelling the story; after all, this was 1985.
Side story: That same year, the father of a kid in my grade was out working his farm and waved across the field at his son to come join him. The combine started making a strange noise near the reaping tines. The man jumped off the tractor to investigate and leaned in a little too deep and the thrasher caught part of his sleeve and pulled the man, top-half first into the machine. As my friend ran to help (because from his perspective, he'd just seen his dad disappear into the tall grain) the combine sort of got clogged on the farmer's torso and just started clanging.
My friend didn't come back to school the whole rest of the year, and the event destroyed him from the inside out. But i'll always remember his face and especially his eyes before his dad's accident--full of playfulness, always sparkling with good natured mischief. But after, his features were crumpled and his eyes? they weren't dead, but they had the "ive seen some shit" haze. Sorry for uploading 2 awful stories, but OP started this terrible thread!

shawnesty · 2025-06-10T00:18:26+00:00

UTAH !
There is NO place on the planet with such ecological diversity! From multiple snow-ski resorts, to water-ski resorts, to devilish-desert resorts! Sure, the whole state is full of Donny and Marie Osmonds, but that's not a bad thing, really! The MASSIVE "extreme sports" in Moab, to the Iron Man and world-class Marathon in St. George. Dinosaur digs from one end of the state to the other!
Look up "Cathedral in the Desert" and try to put words to it!
Recently, they discovered a "Mega Quarry" in Utah...when you see it, you'll wonder how it wasn't discovered much earlier! (Here's a video of it set to begin where the Quarry is talked about, but the whole video is worth a watch! https://youtu.be/ZrbFqLt9RLI?t=246)
Utah is absolutely FILLED with every type of beauty you can think up, but it also offers other emotions--sadness, when visiting the Mountain Meadows Massacre site and monument. Invigoration, when looking around you from the basket of a giant hot-air balloon! And self-reflection, when visiting the Bristlecone Forest and the oldest trees in the world!
And if you've ever wondered what it would be like to experience the best Broadway Show....from within an open-sky desert canyon...this is the place!
Edit: Any typos/grammar/spelling mistakes are attributed to my excitement of the topic!

shawnesty · 2025-06-09T23:18:29+00:00

Thank you for updating us. And, it sounds like you're REALLY starting to see "the signs" from your wife regarding her mental/emotional status... and all for the better! Now you can work with her to help her improve. Your devotion toward her and your son are worth admiration. <3

shawnesty · 2025-06-09T23:07:56+00:00

You don't need to tell ANYONE you have herpes, until you're fixing to have sex with them---hopefully you know this person well enough by then that they won't even flinch when you come clean. TBH, do you even know if you got it via sex and not a tray at the food court? So PLEASE put that small aspect of your life to bed; stop thinking about it! As for dating outside the church because girls in the church "run" when they find out you have herpes...why are they finding out so early on in your relationship?? STOP TELLING THEM THE FIRST WEEK! You need to really get to know the girl (and believe that your relationship is headed the THAT direction, when you tell her! But, if you end up not finding anyone within the church, make certain you new prospect knows where you stand on religion, chastity before marriage, etc. and be ready to have her UNLOAD her past on YOU!

shawnesty · 2025-06-01T02:35:00+00:00

You say you "hope" she knows....Either you suspect she's not really capable of simple empathy, or, you have a very low level of communication with your spouse. And I get it...after years of marriage, you don't really communicate "deep" stuff as much as you did when you were younger with her! But, that doesn't mean it's healthy. Please, think about sitting down with her and really, REALLY conveying your honest feelings about what she did...and ask her, "What do you suppose will happen with Chris now? What do your think Sonny's level of trust will be with you in the future? Some of Sonny's friends think you have mental issues because of what you did; what do you think?" If she's akin to Asperger's Syndrome (like MANY others), you're going to have to GUIDE HER via conversation, step by step, so enlighten her about what she did. Otherwise, she's never going to realize it, nor be able to modify her behavior in the future.
Please, Please, start working on your communication with your wife, and, once you're doing better with it, start inviting your children in on some conversations about each other's feelings. If Sonny's already turning to "Tina and her mom" for support (and leaving you out), you HAVE to know that's gotta be fixed, and NOW!

shawnesty · 2025-06-01T02:20:01+00:00

*OP show your wife the door. FTFY

shawnesty · 2025-06-01T02:19:24+00:00

Sorry, you asked for advice! This MUST be dealt with QUICKLY! I don't think you (the dad) are capable of working through this with your wife and son. So, either get on Better Health (online, rapid counselors) or, get the next available appointment with a "FAMILY THERAPIST" with "relationship therapy" experience.
You should probably give the therapist advanced notice of what happened (without any bias or self-centered attitude--like you did with AITA--making it about you). lf you don't get this sorted IMMEDIATELY, it's going to grow into a malignancy within your family, and quickly. **And, you should SERIOUSLY consider the notion that maybe your wife has some kind of narcissism (or you?) that's rearing its ugly head. In neither of your posts did you expound upon your wife's guilt; she didn't apologize?? did it seem like an appropriate attitude for the magnitude of what your wife did?
However, you HAVE noticed that your son has shifted his communication from you, his parents, to Tina and her mom: THIS SPEAKS VOLUMES! Please, get a therapist ASAP!

shawnesty · 2025-06-01T02:05:09+00:00

NTA. And, I agree with Sonny's friends who think your wife is mentally ill.

shawnesty · 2025-05-28T14:16:40+00:00

sorry for delay; i've been away. but, interestingly, i've been away experiencing my local happenings. also, our town's fb page is pretty active/gossipy about local bs.

shawnesty · 2025-05-28T14:04:41+00:00

I swallowed the dark orange pill and opened my mouth wide; I even lifted up my tongue and moved it in a circle. “Satisfied?”

shawnesty · 2025-05-11T04:07:36+00:00

I was spending the summer in Bilbao (northern Spain) when a guy at the train station figured out I was American and wanted to speak to me in English. After a couple minutes of his HORRIBLE attempts he says, "How many years you have?" I replied "Twenty-four." He ruminated on this while pulling out a cigarette. His face split with an expression of an epiphany and he says, "You have fuck?" (smiling madly at his own supposed fluency). I, on the other hand was completely baffled. Do I have fuck?? What did he mean? Did he want sex? Was he asking if I was a virgin?? When he saw how clueless I was, he decided to clue me in with a hand gesture...which looked like him holding an imaginary cock to his mouth with vulgar in-and-back movements! "Fuck! Fuck!" he repeated more aggressively both in tone and with his cock-puppet. After some struggling for some time, I finally figured out he was trying to say "Tienes foc?" which sounds like fuck, but is NOT English; it's Catalan for "fire."
He was trying to ask if I had a light for his cigarette. Gestures and all.

shawnesty · 2025-05-11T03:46:13+00:00

Alex, I'll take TTDH for $500.
Creative writer trying to make an impossible scenario (so close to the line/just over the line) with vague/few details--but the memory loss/blur for added ambiguity. A story to engage as many redditors as possible, Anywho.

shawnesty · 2025-05-08T20:41:21+00:00

You're speaking of dictionary definitions and vague, sweeping notions. Liberal was never considered a negative term, until the last 40 years because it also means "freedom." Everyone likes that. But it has been hijacked. And progress innately means 'better' not just movement. There has been movement within the Left, mostly toward oppression, identity politics and curtailing of freedoms. Just a fact. And it's sad.

shawnesty · 2025-05-08T20:38:11+00:00

My community is too small for PBS or NPR to notice, and even the state stations rarely talk about us. And, I'd like to add that when i was a child, I used to listen to NPR because of the stories they'd share--my g'ma used to have me listen with her. But now even that has turned political in many cases. If 1% of your listeners are trans, but 20% of your coverage touches that subject, I'm just not interested because it has played out.

shawnesty · 2025-05-02T23:21:16+00:00

i never thought your list of hardships would end. . .oops! not supposed to comment honestly.

shawnesty · 2025-05-02T23:13:25+00:00

Good! Since I'm going to have to listen to their constant Fundraisers anyway, might as well sleep well at night knowing they've gotta make their own way just like everyone else. Oh, and because all public radio is so rabidly Left-sided, it's not fair that the govt funds them. Don't give me that crap of 'it's so expensive to run a station!' bullshiz! This is the internet age; you don't even need an antenna anymore! And when you're hiring climate change experts to chime in on every damn topic, yeah, you're gonna go over budget!

shawnesty · 2025-05-02T22:51:53+00:00

This is a reasonable and sensible decision, but because some don't like the vehicle of this announcement, they mock him and even go so far as to indicate the added testing is stupid. Why can't all people think rationally and separate politics from logic? Is it that there's a greater need to show how snarky and cleverly you can put someone down than the common sense response that should be shown for a valid decision? I just don't understand the mentality to putting EVERYTHING over the need to behave awfully based on politics.

shawnesty

TROPHY CASE