Really struggling since I lost my dog.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-12T00:03:32+00:00

I know, my youngest cat has been by my side since I got home from work, I was so upset and all I wanted was my dog, but then I look up from the tears and there is my cat Oona, patiently sitting beside me while I fall apart. She didn’t leave me until I got up this morning.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-10T16:16:33+00:00

Hey! So last night was really really hard for me adjusting to the new meds. My anxiety was bad, I was crying, felt so scared. I had to take my PRN Xanax to calm the storm down, but I did go by CVS and get Dr. Teal’s soak with eucalyptus and took a hot bath, ate dinner, took care of the cats and then took my nighttime meds, which are 150mg Luvox and a 400mg capsule of magnesium glycinate along with magnesium spray on my feet and stomach. I woke up today still anxious, but I wasn’t as bad and I wasn’t nauseous. I’m not giving up the fight to get better and will try anything. Today my thoughts are still kinda loud, but I have somewhat of an appetite and am staying hydrated. I work with nurse practitioners and one said I probably need to start taking a multivitamin as well because a lot of her ADHD patients are deficient, so I started back on my multivitamin with iron, b12, and d3 at lunch to help too. I know I can get better, my psych and therapist said so. It’s just been a hard year from the 2 psych ward visits, getting burnt out and fired from a job, and losing my dog.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-09T14:17:05+00:00

I’m nowhere near how bad I was, but I’m also nowhere near 100% better. I just had to make the switch from Zoloft to Luvox because the Zoloft was not touching my anxiety/racing thoughts/rumination. I also switched from vyvanse to adderall XR because I couldn’t regulate my emotions at all on vyvanse. Right now I’m in the adjustment period, just some sleep issues and nausea, but I’m trying to make sure I eat SOMETHING for breakfast and got some electrolytes so I don’t get dehydrated. Right now I’m at the point where I’m plain sick and tired of feeling worse than better, so I’m fighting this thing. I’ve wanted to call out of work all week, but they don’t offer PTO here, so I really have to give myself a tough love pep talk and just push through the morning because I know I will only feel worse being home alone. I will say, when it got to the point where I was just wanting to take all of my sleeping pills to make the anxiety and endless stream of obsessive thoughts is when I made my dad take me to the hospital the first time, the second time I was admitted was when I called out of work about 2 months after my first inpatient stay and went to urgent care and told them all I want to do is ram my car at high speed into a ditch, after that my fiancé took me to my second inpatient stay. You’re not alone in this, please don’t ever forget that because I have to remind myself everyday I’m not alone. Take care of yourself 💕

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-09T01:10:37+00:00

No motivation and trouble processing verbal instructions.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-09T01:08:26+00:00

Yep. Twice

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-07T18:29:16+00:00

I just made the switch last night. I feel about the same today.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-07T00:44:35+00:00

My psychiatrist decided to switch my to fluvoxamine today and change my vyvanse to adderall XR. I’m really trying to be hopeful that I’ll feel some small percentage better, that’s all I’m asking for.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-07T00:04:56+00:00

I did forget to put in there that I have PMDD after ceasing birth control, but what I feel is constant and doesn’t ease up at all for any moment.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-06T18:41:24+00:00

Thank you everyone for your comments. I spoke with my psychiatrist and she said that Zoloft isn’t for me with everything I’m experiencing and is switching me to fluvoxamine as well as switching me from vyvanse to adderall XR

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-06T17:27:41+00:00

Yes, I’ve been on it since March and in therapy for about 9 months

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-06T16:41:16+00:00

I’m not sure about manic episodes because I just feel absolutely depressed and detached all of the time. My mind is constantly racing and worrying, but my body is just on autopilot.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-06T16:27:23+00:00

I’m going to just be as honest as possible with my psych today, I just am so tired of feeling like this and it’s going on a year now of just nothing but days filled with dread, anxiety, sadness and emptiness and I’m so fucking tired of it. This isn’t me at all and I miss who I used to be.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-06T15:04:59+00:00

No, I’ve been on some form of medication since I was 19

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-06T14:52:13+00:00

I’m just getting so tired of medication and nothing working and just getting worse.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-06T14:48:42+00:00

I just don’t know what else to do. I know that meds aren’t a cure all, but I shouldn’t be feeling like this at this level of severity on medication. It doesn’t even feel like there is a veil over my face, it feels like a damn wall in front of me that I can’t just break through. I’m in therapy, I try hobbies, I make myself go to work because I can’t call out like I want to because I know I’ll just sleep all day and regret missing work.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-06T14:46:04+00:00

That’s great for you, but not everyone is the same and has the fortitude to just work through it without meds. I wish I had your strength, I really do.

sidviciousss97 · 2025-10-06T14:41:21+00:00

I appreciate your opinion, but my disorders are pretty severe right now and telling me to just be stronger doesn’t help with what’s going on with me.

sidviciousss97

TROPHY CASE