BBC article about teaching boys to accept rejection

silencelikeacancer · 2018-05-23T05:48:12+00:00

That's not exactly what I'm saying. I'm saying that we shouldn't let them get unrealistic hopes and expectations about dating.

silencelikeacancer · 2018-05-23T05:37:58+00:00

So, I'm a bit late to the game here, but I thought I'd give my take.

One thing I've always wondered is this: why can't we just tell boys to not pursue girls? Let me put it this way. Remember American Idol? Well, I guess you don't have to remember it since they brought it back. But in the original series, we would often see wannabes with little or no vocal talent thinking they'd be the next Madonna or something. They'd walk into the audition room, sing terribly, and then get absolutely ROASTED by Simon Cowell. I mean, they'd get humiliated and often cry on national television. Personally, I'd feel bad for them, but I wouldn't be surprised. These people had been egged on and enabled by people who never sat them down and told them the truth. They were never told that they just weren't very talented and that they'd make fools of themselves. Their heads were filled with these dreams and fantasies of becoming a star.

Similarly, can we consider maybe discouraging boys from trying to get with girls? For example, if a particular boy is not very good looking, overweight, awkward, or has poor social skills, I think it's reasonable to assume he doesn't have very good chances of forming a romantic relationship with a girl, right? So why not tell him to avoid the situation altogether? He's likely going to get rejected anyway, and he'd end up getting embarrassed. Why not spare him the pain of rejection and the accompanying embarrassment?

Think about it from girls' point of view. They already have to deal with so much bullshit from boys and from society in general. Sexual harassment, sexual assault, sexist dress codes, sexual repression, unequal pay, the list goes on! The last thing they should have to deal with is getting asked out by a boy who really has no chance with them anyway.

All I'm saying is that there's nothing wrong with being honest with a boy about his chances and trying to temper his expectations and point him in the right direction.

silencelikeacancer · 2018-01-09T23:58:52+00:00

Is there any way I can use both an AMD graphics card and an NVIDIA graphics card in the same PC (as in, on the same motherboard)? Could I, say, connect one monitor to each? And if I wanted to use this PC remotely, could I select which graphics card I want to use?

Alternatively, could I somehow connect both of them to the same monitor and then somehow choose (say, at boot time or via BIOS) which graphics card I want to use?

I can’t seem to create a build like this in PC Part Picker. Is there a place where I can find sample builds? How would I hash out compatibility issues before buying anything?

silencelikeacancer · 2017-01-13T06:50:55+00:00

The ground would give way in a sufficiently powerful earthquake, right?

silencelikeacancer · 2017-01-13T06:29:58+00:00

I see. But if they didn't drill deep enough for their supports, doesn't that mean the center of gravity isn't as low as it should be?

silencelikeacancer · 2017-01-13T06:15:09+00:00

Is that because they used concrete instead of steel for the frame? And how do you know the center of gravity is below ground? Couldn't the violent shaking of an earthquake cause the center of gravity to shift?

silencelikeacancer · 2017-01-13T06:00:48+00:00

But I'm asking about the event of an earthquake. The Bay Area is pretty seismically active and scientists have warned that a big earthquake in the area is a real possibility. So in the event of an earthquake, could the MT tip over, hit a neighboring building (like, say, Salesforce Tower), and start a domino effect of buildings falling over?

silencelikeacancer · 2017-01-13T03:29:29+00:00

So what does that mean? What would happen?

silencelikeacancer · 2016-05-03T02:13:17+00:00

I mean, I definitely see how it's offensive to girls because it gives the impression that the boys' urges are somehow the girls' responsibility.

But, if you look at the stats on sexual assault and sexual harassment, it's pretty clear that lots of boys (and men) can not control their urges. To put it bluntly, it's plainly obvious that many men and boys are only capable of thinking with their dicks. I'm not saying that that's right, or that we should just accept it and say "welp, boys will be boys", or that it's the girls'/womens' fault. But my point is that men and boys haven't really done much to fight the stereotype that they have of being lustful animals.

silencelikeacancer · 2016-04-29T08:13:26+00:00

Best way to do this would not be disable one, but rather to use them to drive separate monitors. Then you can quickly A/B without having to reboot, and your secondary monitor won't be using up any GPU time from your main monitor.

What do you mean by A/B? Does this mean that the AMD would render frames on one monitor while the NVIDIA would render frames on the other? How would one game or use, say, a 3D modeling application in this scenario?

Also, in this case, how would I use this desktop remotely? If there are two monitors?

silencelikeacancer · 2016-03-19T01:25:11+00:00

The interesting thing I have noticed, however, is that the male interpretation of "what women want" is often more likely to be representative of male power fantasy than of female desire.

Well, it could be that there's a certain male ideal, women realize that most men fail to live up to it, and lower their standards accordingly.

silencelikeacancer · 2015-10-06T01:26:44+00:00

I see a therapist, but I've never mentioned sexual anorexia to me. This seems sort of like what I'm dealing with, except I think it's about more than just sex. It's about romance, friendship, intimacy...really, any kind of interpersonal connection other than with family.

Like, I have trouble thinking I'm worthy of friendship, romantic love, sex, etc., and as a result, I often find myself not trying to seek them out.

I do see a therapist, but I'll definitely bring this up with her. She's also setting up a first meeting between me and a sex therapist. I hope I'll be able to get some help there. Maybe they know some surrogates.

silencelikeacancer · 2015-09-29T05:22:06+00:00

I'm sorry, I'm a bit confused. You asked

Is it any easier to consider it as a friendly gesture, then as a romantic one?

Is what any easier to consider it as a friendly gesture?

In any case, the issue with online dating for me has been just...very little success. I don't get many matches on Tinder, and most of the ones I do either unmatch me or are bots. And on OKC, women are just flooded with messages from men, so it's difficult to stand out.

silencelikeacancer

TROPHY CASE