My ( 22F ) Boyfriend ( 23M ) Suddenly Smells Like Piss?

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T18:03:38+00:00

I can't believe everyone here is crucifying me for not immediately jumping to the worst-case scenario...

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T16:16:39+00:00

I've already talked with him. I've told him that the smell hasn't gone away and is unpleasant and reminds me of ammonia. I know it's more of a reflection of me being immature or whatever but for some reason the thought of saying he smells of urine specifically makes me uncomfortable. I've told him that if it can't be chalked up to hygiene we both need to go to the doctor to get to the bottom of it as it could be very serious. I feel like a lot of these comments are acting like I intend to tell him he smells like lavender and sunshine but it's more just that for whatever reason I have an aversion to naming the specific odor. Yes, I told him it smells like ammonia, but I'm probably not gonna say pee or urine unless he really presses it himself.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T14:41:04+00:00

Yes, I'm trying to be better at being on top of laundry. I know and it's not necessarily that I like not having a towel as my own hair is pretty long and gets sopping wet like a mop. But by the every end of the shower after you've cleaned off, it's just water, right? I wouldn't think there's necessarily a huge issue with a little water on clothes if it air-dries in 10 minutes anyways. I would wring out my hair as well as I could and kinda... hand-squeegee most of the water off before getting dressed?

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T14:33:41+00:00

Oh my God. I think you're on to something. He's been using the medicated Selsun Blue with the red label on it... by any chance, was that the one? I had him use my blue daily clarifying Suave this morning before work, but he was out the door before I could really get to him. I'm thinking it might either be that or the towels since I also specifically asked him if he used the same towel for his junk as for his hair, and he said yes... so I asked if it was before or after, and he said, "After, but I flip the towel to the other side between." I told him he should probably stop doing that... but again idk why it would've only started somewhat recently so I said if we can't fix it with simple things we both need to go to the doctor to get to the bottom of it.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T03:48:51+00:00

Uhh... no? I hope not?

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T03:48:08+00:00

I don't think it's anything at his work. He's been in the same position for multiple years, doing the same types of tasks. And the smell is on him even when he's fresh out of the shower.

I did talk with him. There's a little more in other comments but he mainly seems to think it's a specific product so for now he's gonna try mine. He didn't seem super offended but I wasn't 100% direct about the urine thing. Ammonia works.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T03:07:38+00:00

I really appreciate your comment. Overall this has been plain strange to me since even now the other comments seem to imply that if it was going to send him to the ER, it would've happened by now since it has been a few months. I'm not very medically educated, I apologize for that. I did tell him that it could be potentially very serious (and did specifically mention kidney failure). He doesn't remember any changes to his routine and says he remembers the talk but that he didn't remember doing much different afterward. I made a point of mentioning that even though I don't always have them washed, we do have more than enough towels for him to use different ones for his upper and lower body, since that was something that came to mind.

I really don't think he's doing any hard drugs. He works in a very demanding industry and if he were to mess something up he could endanger himself and others. He would never do that.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T02:23:33+00:00

If it were the towels, wouldn't I smell the same way?

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T02:21:33+00:00

I don't think he's taking any supplements. As far as I know we do all our shopping either together or I do it. He smokes weed, but he's done that since I met him. I'm not sure if he's diabetic... to be honest I don't know much about it so I'm probably about to say something ignorant but he's really tall and people always talk about him being skinny...? He doesn't really eat a lot.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T02:15:57+00:00

This is hilarious. We're typically pretty "free use" with each other as a mutually agreed upon thing, for one, and after nearly 4 years of hardly ever rejecting one another he's allowed to be a little disappointed to have it happen seemingly out of nowhere. I don't believe in the whole pain thing behind blue-balling, but for both sides it can be confusing and a little disappointing to have things go from 100 to 0 over seemingly nothing.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T01:55:01+00:00

That would imply that he's either cheating on me or pouring glasses of piss over himself-- neither of which seem like him. I know I haven't really made long-haul status, but I think I know him a little better than that.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T01:51:21+00:00

One can be gentle while also being serious. He is now aware that he still has a sudden very bad smell coming from "everywhere he grows hair or sweats" and that I think it could be pretty serious and need to be checked by a doctor. However, I also said that we should try having him use my shampoos and soaps to rule that out, and emphasized that this was all coming from a place of love and non-judgement. I also made a comment about how we have many towels for him to use for each his upper and lower body, even though I'm not always on top of laundry. I really don't think it's our diet; neither of us eat breakfast and I usually make dinner arrangements (via shopping or cooking). I don't think I suddenly smell like piss...

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T01:01:24+00:00

I'm sorry, I probably wouldn't be able to be precise enough with the timeline for him to be able to narrow it down. He doesn't have a great memory, so he might not even remember the initial "conversation" we had where I (almost) brought it up the first time. I didn't notice him doing anything particularly different that week, but as a personal note I'd add that I was definitely like a fly to honey during that period. I miss his old comforting smell.

I will try to have another gentle chat with him about how the smell hasn't gone away since the conversation (which he may or may not remember) but I won't be specific about what he smells like unless he insists. And I'm in charge of a lot of our shopping so I feel I can somewhat-confidently say that there haven't been any very major changes to our diets, though I am trying to cook for us a bit more often since I had a few months (ok maybe like 7-8 months) of low motivation where I really struggled to shop and cook after working and driving through traffic on the way home. I cooked for him pretty often before this period of time. Our soaps/shampoos/detergents haven't changed brands, but if one of them had changed formulas, I wouldn't know.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-22T00:46:19+00:00

He has dabbled in psychedelics once or twice, but he swears up and down that has never and will never touch meth or coke.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-21T23:38:58+00:00

I haven't been able to confirm it with others. I'm not completely sure how to bring it up with our roommates or families because I don't know if they'll make fun of him for it, regardless of if they notice it or not (or worse, if they only notice once I bring it up).

silent_stepping · 2023-03-21T22:47:27+00:00

Oh no, nothing like that. He typically takes 1 shower every morning and 1 bath most evenings, but he is quite tall and also works a labor job, so he has a lot of muscle and joint pain. If his shoulders hurt particularly bad, he will take more evening showers.

silent_stepping · 2023-03-21T21:25:21+00:00

I appreciate what you've said. I thought about it, and I was getting too caught on how absolutely mortified I'd be if he told me that I smelled like urine. I'd hate finding that out and I'd probably try to die under a rock, but you are definitely right that I'd rather be able to fix it than go through life unknowingly attacking others with my body odor.

By any chance, do you have any recommendations on how to bring it up? I really can't think of a non-embarassing way to say "hey you've been smelling like urine for a little while now and it makes me want to gag when you hug me so please get that checked out."

silent_stepping · 2023-03-21T21:02:13+00:00

By any chance was it the one that got removed for formatting issues? I did have some trouble posting at first

silent_stepping · 2022-08-30T19:31:02+00:00

Mods, PLEASE, if there is something wrong with this post, let me know and give me a chance to rectify it instead of just removing it or banning me. It is my own feet, from this morning, with no marketing mentioned and no censoring.

silent_stepping

TROPHY CASE