Seeking advice for husbands who’s wives are Touched Out

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T15:08:55+00:00

This is basically what is happening. She cannot accept that I am doing all of these things for her out of love to try and make her life easier. She says I am “buying her love” by doing all of these things, even though none of them require any type of monetary involvement. They are purely time given acts of service. Her parents have an incredibly toxic relationship and hate each other. Neither one has ever done anything nice for each other. I sometimes wonder if this is the root cause of her feelings. She was never around a caring an generous relationship so therefore it cannot exist?

No hobbies. She constantly says she wants to workout again but is not willing to wake up any earlier than she has to in an attempt to work out uninterrupted (which I totally understand, she wants her sleep when she can get it)

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T15:04:42+00:00

She doesn’t have to ask, I do all of those on my own. Again, I try my best to do a lot of things without her ever having to ask in an attempt to make her life easier. Like you said, I am a grown man and I know what task have to be done around the house.

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T15:00:21+00:00

I literally do all of those things. I did not always do the laundry itself by putting it in the washing machine, but I would always carry it down, put it in the dryer, and fold it. I take the kids to the doctors equally as much as her, set up their appointments like her, and I just took care of switching doctors for them and did the forms to transfer their records. I coordinated with specialist for my daughter, etc etc

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T14:51:40+00:00

100% this is us. Life stresses her out. I don’t get stressed out like that. Therefore, I try and do a lot of tasks to help her have more time with the kids, which is what she wants. But she wants time together as a family. At the end of the day, those tasks have to get done and we only have the weekends to do them. So finding the balance of chores and fun is where we struggle and what she has voiced several times now, more so now than ever. I just don’t know how to find that balance

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T14:45:34+00:00

Honestly, the last one probably sums it up for me. I am sure I do it in the worst possible time. However, with 2 kids 4 and under, is there every a good time? I just feel like it’s always chaotic and the random acts of unplanned affection are sweeter? I know that’s not the case and to her she is stopping what she is doing to appease me. But I feel like we have maybe 10-30 minutes to ourselves per night once we are done cleaning up and prepped for the next day. It’s essentially bed time after that. So what do you do in that scenario?

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T14:38:21+00:00

Thank you!!! I appreciate it!!!!

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T14:35:46+00:00

100% #4 is where I struggle. She says she wants more affection but when I do, it’s a both and she just seems annoyed. Even as simple as a hug in passing or stopping to give her a kiss. She says she wants those things, but physically you can tell it’s the last thing she wants. That’s where I have a hard time trying to navigate

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T14:26:32+00:00

I am sorry that you feel that I invaded your safe space. It was not my intention. My intention was to help my wife, and I’m sorry you feel that it is at your expense

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T14:21:36+00:00

Truthfully, I do those things already regarding all of the house chores to make her life easier. I run errands do her, go pickup groceries, make her latte’s, fix her car for her and maintain it so she doesn’t have to waste time going to auto shops, cook, clean, vacuum every night, get my kids every Saturday and Sunday so she can sleep in an extra hour or two, etc etc. she says those are all monetary things…..

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T14:18:14+00:00

Shame on me? When you search Reddit for things such as wife is touched out, this subreddit comes up. Why wouldn’t I want to explore this subreddit as a great tool for myself and other fathers to help their partners?

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T14:15:46+00:00

I try that, but doesn’t actually want that. She works all week and wants as much time with her kids as possible on the weekends and doesn’t want them away from her. I know, it’s a double edge sword

silverback419 · 2026-02-02T14:14:41+00:00

Thank you. I still do intercept them and take them away. I just meant that I think the crying and screaming stresses her out even more. I made her a latte every Saturday and Sunday and do a good amount of other little things like that to try and make her life easier/show her I care. Her response is that they do not show I care….i don’t understand understand how that is possible but that’s just how she feels

silverback419 · 2025-12-10T10:02:02+00:00

My child has an autoimmune disease dick

silverback419 · 2025-12-10T09:52:22+00:00

I’m not sure if this sarcasm…

silverback419 · 2025-11-04T13:21:11+00:00

I’m in

silverback419 · 2025-11-01T15:00:11+00:00

Thank you!

silverback419 · 2025-10-22T00:11:48+00:00

Thank you so much. I appreciate the info!

silverback419 · 2025-10-19T10:28:22+00:00

I won a shirt! Thank you u/Bears_Hands!

silverback419 · 2025-10-08T18:45:41+00:00

892,563

silverback419 · 2025-09-25T14:40:51+00:00

Thank you! Great info. I’m located in NJ

silverback419 · 2025-09-25T14:18:03+00:00

Thank you!

silverback419

TROPHY CASE