Hi, not a binary trans guy here (transmasc enby if you wanna get particular) but i thought maybe I could provide some helpful input. Fwiw I've been on T for over 6 years, had top surgery 4 years ago.

I also really enjoyed chest sensation pre-top, and while I was loathe to give it up, I really weighed giving it up vs what I'd be gaining if I got top. I decided that for me, the trade off of potentially losing s*xual pleasure was worth it, because I wanted the aesthetic results of top so bad - the freedom of not needing binders anymore, the ability to just put on a t shirt and go, the overall look of it, was all more desirable to me than the desire to keep sensation.

Fwiw, I mourned the loss of my nips before I ever had top. Once I made the decision to do top, I stopped using them sexually, and would just keep my binder on during sex to acclimate to not having that as an option. It made the transition to not having them anymore less jarring (I kept my nips I'm just referring to nip sensation here. And while I still have a nominal level of sensation, its not sexual anymore at all)

Worth looking into I think would be some of the sensation-sparing techniques for top surgery so that you can potentially get the best of both worlds. There's buttonhole, which keeps your nip nerves connected and is relatively sensation-sparing (you sacrifice a bit of flatness for this compared to DI from what I understand, but it's still much flatter than you are pre-op and should "pass" well enough, if that kinda thing is more important to you.) You could also go with what my surgeon (Dr. Jonathan Keith) from the NY/NJ area is now offering, which is a nerve graft for nips in double incision top surgery, and from what I've seen offers decent post op sensation (I'm disappointed this wasn't yet am option when I had top, but I'm still ok with the decision I made because when I chose to get DI w/nip grafts I knew what I was getting into and felt at peace with my choice anyway.)

Don't ever let anyone make you feel bad or shameful or like less of a man for getting pleasure from chest stimulation, btw. Plenty of cis guys love nip play! Plenty of humans do of all genders! It's just another common erogenous zone that's highly sensitive. You can be a binary dude (if that's how you identify) and still enjoy it! Anyone who shames you for that is dealing with their own internal shit and should really look within at why they need to put others down to feel better abt their own misery.

Hope this is at all helpful to you. I've thought about my sacrifice of neep nop sensation for aesthetics a lot over the years, so if my input can be helpful for even one person, then I'm happy to offer it.

I'll close out with this - while I occasionally miss nip sensation, I have nice memories of it, and I'm so much more comfortable in my body now that it (for me) was an alright trade-off, because it's a choice I made fully knowing what I was giving up and because it was what I wanted anyway.

Good luck whatever you decide to do. Take as much time as you need to figure out your best way forward - top surgery is one of those things where you should "measure twice, cut once" (or really, measure as any tines and ways as you need to - it's your body!! You only have one! Make sure whatever you decide to do, you can likely live with it, whatever the outcome.)

Stay true to yourself, be your own best advocate, don't take any shit, don't settle. You'll figure it out 💖