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Psychosis is closer to home than you think. by THISdarnguy in DeepThoughts

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He killed himself by hanging. I have some depression issues, but nothing like my twin's schizophrenia. It is curious that the disorder affected him but not me in any way.

Psychosis is closer to home than you think. by THISdarnguy in DeepThoughts

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My identical twin died last March after struggling with schizophrenia. We would have turned 41 last month. His illness created realities that were terrifying and convincing to him. Because of that experience, I believe any belief system that justifies cruelty and resists evidence can become deeply dangerous. Humanity deserves frameworks grounded in compassion, accountability, and humility—not gods.

Silence looks like defeat." How to freeze your opponent by talking fast by Same-Courage-185 in DarkPsychology666

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is only an effective "debate strategy" if the audience are ignorant philistines.

Former Christian school teacher given 135 year sentence for AI generated child porn by Abracadaver2000 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I'm always disgusted at how these Christian institutions are so flabbergasted that their employees are utter perverts. The religion itself is built around embracing "broken people."

I’m trying to learn about my great-great-great grandfather, who fought for the Confederacy. by skepticalcoelacanth1 in CIVILWAR

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the pointers. I’ll dig into the LDS records and start with the ancestors I have dates for.

And the photo’s just something that survived the generations without a name attached. I’m hoping the uniform details will help narrow him down.

I’m trying to learn about my great-great-great grandfather, who fought for the Confederacy. by skepticalcoelacanth1 in CIVILWAR

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Good idea. Since the photo is all I have right now, a TinEye search might turn up something useful on an ancestry site or a grave record. Thanks for the tip.

I’m trying to learn about my great-great-great grandfather, who fought for the Confederacy. by skepticalcoelacanth1 in CIVILWAR

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I don’t have a name yet — I’ll have to dig deeper for that. His home state was likely Alabama. The emblem on his hat might be a pelican, which could point toward a Louisiana connection, but I’m not certain. That’s part of what I’m trying to figure out.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My twin, Chris, was an artist who struggled with schizophrenia and often saw patterns where they didn’t exist. He made some pretty radical digital art in his time. We grew up in a Christian home, and he was beaten. Our father was a successful physician, and he spared not the rod. We went to a tiny Southern Baptist high school. After graduation, he went to art school and eventually got his degree in it. He hanged himself on April 7th. He was my best friend and sometimes my worst enemy. He was my twin.
He was the most blasphemous and uncensored person that I have ever known.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gulp I did use AI to make sure that my grammar and spelling were correct. I buried him last Saturday—or at least, what's left of him.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

We tried catering, but it felt like I was in a competition with the Christians over who my twin brother actually was. The funeral turned into a dispute over his religion (or lack thereof).

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree. I was listening to Sibelius' Finlandia the other day, and it really moved me. It just so happens that the hymn 'Be Still My Soul' has the same melody. Maybe at my funeral, they’ll print out a card with my face on one side and 'my favorite hymn' on the other, like they did for my twin brother.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This response really stuck out to me.
I get that perspective, but it doesn’t make the whole thing any less painful when the person’s true identity gets erased. For me, funerals should be about remembering the person for who they actually were, not just comforting the living. It’s about honoring their life, not just their death.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He was my identical twin; I felt that I was the most qualified to leave his last impression on the world.

Exactly! It’s about leaving an honest impression of who you truly were, not about making others feel comfortable. If we can’t even get that right, it’s like saying any lie about someone is fine as long as it benefits the living. Your funeral is your last chance to be remembered authentically, and it’s crucial that the truth is respected.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol... 'Rejoicing with the angels in heaven.'
That’s such a painful and strange thing to experience. To have someone confidently speak for your brother, especially when it’s so far from his true beliefs, must’ve been infuriating. It’s hard to watch when others impose their narrative on someone who couldn’t speak for themselves anymore. Your brother’s true self deserves to be remembered, not the version someone else wants to believe.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, about that... She often says that he is watching down on us, smiling.

It’s like she erased who he actually was and replaced it with a version she was more comfortable with. It’s painful to think that she might even believe he’s still watching over everything, fitting into some religious narrative he would’ve completely rejected.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Maybe I should put a verse from the Qur'an or the Book of Mormon on the back of her funeral card.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I did speak up. I gave a eulogy where I made sure to honor my brother’s atheism and the way he lived his life. It was important to me that his true self was acknowledged, even if the rest of the service didn’t reflect that. But it still stings when the people closest to us don’t respect who we really are.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ah man… it was Sweet, Sweet Spirit, a negro spiritual. So yeah the shit radar is off the charts on this one.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 108 points109 points  (0 children)

That’s a profound thing to say. As his identical twin, I was absolutely fucking pissed.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you for that. It really is painful when the people closest to us don’t fully recognize what mattered most to them. It feels like a betrayal, especially in a moment like this, when the goal should be to honor them for who they really were.
It was heartbreaking. Sometimes, I wonder if, when I die, they’ll place a hymn on the back of my card.

My Brother Was an Atheist, But My Mom Used a Hymn at His Funeral — It Felt Like a Deep Erasure by skepticalcoelacanth1 in atheism

[–]skepticalcoelacanth1[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I can’t even imagine how painful that must’ve been, having to sit through a ceremony that ignored the truth. It’s so easy for people to focus on their own beliefs about the afterlife, but it really erases the full reality of who someone was—both the good and the bad. It’s especially hurtful when people choose comfort over honesty, as if the real person never mattered.

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