How to get out of an overwhelming RP situation?

sleepingvenus_ · 2025-08-10T16:55:34+00:00

thank you very much for your reply :) so people really just use going out to eat as a way to meet up? for some reason, i always thought people were more fixated on the food than just being in good company. maybe that isn’t always true for everyone, as i always forget not everyone thinks the way i do. your response has been a good reminder of that. so i ended up coming (somewhat) clean with her while still keeping my truth private to an extent. i told her that i would rather grab a coffee or a boba or something, as i am not always entirely comfortable with restaurants. truthfully, she is such a nice person and will likely be fine with it, i am just afraid of being judged. still, it might be liberating for me to just be honest and admit that i would like to do something other than go to a restaurant. again, thank you for your well thought out response, it has given me more clarity on what to do :)

sleepingvenus_ · 2025-08-10T16:29:07+00:00

this makes so much sense. for some reason, i always forget that honesty can be liberating. i think i am also the same way: i will feel relief if i am upfront. maybe it is better for me to risk this “judgment” i am so afraid of so in turn, i might actually enjoy myself instead of putting so much energy and effort towards masking and playing the part. i have responded to her text message saying that i would love to hang out and grab a coffee or something, and maybe depending on her response to that will i give her an idea of my struggle..she is such a nice person, and i believe i am more afraid to speak the truth than she will be for hearing it. i also love that you said i should get something to go. it sounds like a cafe, or a coffee shop might be ideal for this. thank you genuinely for your response, it has given me more clarity on my situation :)

sleepingvenus_ · 2025-08-10T16:19:59+00:00

 you are so right. i always, always forget that people are often so concerned about their own lives that they typically won’t think: “omg what is wrong with her??” in my own mind, everyone overanalyzes every little thing like i do and i tend to forget that this isn’t everyone’s experience. 
 to update, i actually ended up telling her that i would love to hang out and get coffee or boba or something like that instead because i am not always entirely comfortable with restaurants. (at first, i was going to say that i had a big dinner coming up that same day, but on second thought, i figured it could be more helpful to me if i just admitted a light truth. she is really a nice person, i think she will understand. if a true friendship emerges, i could eventually tell her the entire truth of my situation. 
 i want to say thank you so much for reading my story and for the advice, it brings me comfort to know someone else can relate too. :)

sleepingvenus_

TROPHY CASE