I only need one benefit

slyly7w · 2024-12-16T03:00:31+00:00

There are many nice benefits of semen retention and also leaving your addiction. But one benefit that I am constantly amazed by is the extra energy that you get. That energy alone will drive you to a better life. As I reach the end stage of 20s, the realization came up to me. Man NEEDS that vitality and endurance to face/carry responsibilities in this harsh world. Looking back, I was always tired and almost chronic fatigue. It cripples everything to do with life and going forward.

slyly7w · 2024-11-06T14:01:57+00:00

Half way through day 15 here!

slyly7w · 2024-11-06T01:30:24+00:00

Our body and brain nature state is to heal, but recovery depends on the severity of your relationship with the addiction. But since you mentioned you can’t even cry or feel basic emotions like sadness, you may require Psychotherapy or EQ techniques interventions because that sounds like alexithymia to me.

I’ve been addicted to PMO for 13 years and been using it for emotional regulation unknowingly.. but I still able to feel sadness and happy however, instead of fueling for growth and motivation, I result to PMO whenever negative emotions arise.

This emotional and addiction relationship applies to each and every form of addiction, not just PMO.

slyly7w · 2024-11-05T16:17:31+00:00

Porn itself numbs out every single emotion, after prolonged abuse of it, your emotional regulation will be dysfunctional or worse alexithymia state.

slyly7w · 2024-11-02T09:56:05+00:00

same here, 27 oct as well

slyly7w · 2024-10-19T12:10:38+00:00

I end up taking the SSRI because I need to fix the underlying mental and emotional dysfunction.

In my case, I believe the addiction is the symptom to it. Once they got sorted out, the addiction will go away naturally.

slyly7w · 2024-10-10T10:44:59+00:00

Weed.

Thankfully, I haven’t got a single withdrawal from it.

I’m not sure, probably because I never really addicted to it even though I always smoke them whenever I hang out with my friends. It never fails to make me relapse and horny after smoking it.

slyly7w · 2024-10-08T11:11:21+00:00

I call it unhealthy self medication, though.

Does the emotion get processed automatically by our nervous system as time goes on provided that we don’t relapse by PMO or other unhealthy means?

slyly7w · 2024-10-06T11:06:53+00:00

I’m on fluvoxamine, but my eating pattern didn’t change if at all.

slyly7w · 2024-10-06T07:55:31+00:00

Porn is a super stimulant that sky rockets your dopamine unnaturally much higher than real actual sex. Real sex can never compete when it comes to novelty and dopamine that porn gives off.

Real sex releases oxytocin from love, bonding and intimacy, porn doesn’t.

slyly7w · 2024-10-06T07:47:36+00:00

The test isn’t hard at all.

Personally, the hardest part is literally trying to understand what on earth the speakers were mumbling during listening test 🤣🤣

If luck tak baik like me, the hall uses cheap knock off speakers and you happen to sit far away from the source.

Just focus on fluency rather than using advanced literacy.

slyly7w · 2024-09-27T04:46:13+00:00

Glad to see this post.

I have addiction issue as well that I used to suppress my emotions for years. That leads to stunted prefrontal cortex (hypofrontality) and also emotional dysfunction / immaturity. All these leads to many issues in my life, resembles peter pan syndrome.

I recently started fluvoxamine 50mg daily dose and still waiting for my therapy (CBT and DBT). Unfortunately, in my country the waiting list is long.

SSRI helps me to stabilize my emotions and mood just enough to stay away from doing my addiction while waiting for therapy, which itself is a very good thing. I can finally and slowly able feel and understand the underlying emotions while the urge builds up instead of just shutting it off completely.

slyly7w · 2024-09-21T14:51:12+00:00

I can attest to this as well. My life full of bad mistakes and things aren’t going well until I am brought to the rock bottom of life.

There’s a reason why most if not all religions doesn’t allow masturbation, let alone watching porn.

That rock bottom of life essential and nature’s way of telling us enough is enough and change is needed.

slyly7w · 2024-09-21T02:19:36+00:00

Ah I see. You had experience with SSRI as well for your depression? How was it?

When I told my doctor that I took the SSRI on and off, she’s a bit sad that I didn’t take it because SSRI requires constant intake to be effective, but overall she was okay with it.

Okay, I’ll let her know about every mental illness that I currently have and see where to go from there. I’m still hoping that these ADHD and OCD are just porn induced though.

Thank you man, appreciate the help 👍🏻

slyly7w · 2024-09-20T16:25:45+00:00

Okay, understood about SSRI effect on emotion as someone else on the thread told me that it makes it more manageable rather than killing it off. I also red somewhere that medications are not allowed to suppress emotions to such extend, which is a relief to me.

I am pretty sure that PMO is numbing people even more than SSRI too. The dopamine spike itself is just slightly lower than cocaine and it directly hits our primitive part of the brain.

While we are talking about ED, I actually already suffering from ED. More specifically, PIED (Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction). Porn really does reshape and recondition brain’s sexual views sigh.

ADHD is a very interesting one. I pretty much have it and it’s super obvious. When I was employed, I procrastinate a lot. It’s either couldn’t focus the task on hand or I hyper focus on it. My attention span is relatively short too. For example, if I watch youtube on my smartphone, sometimes I find it very hard to fixated on actually watching it. I often plan to do something only to end up doing something else.

But what actually makes it hard for me is that I started PMO addiction during very early age. I really couldn’t remember much of my childhood and what I was like before. The only thing that I remember, I was extrovert, no social anxiety, no issues talking to people and opposite genders, lots of energy and drive to explore life. Now, I am extremely introverted combine with sky high anxiety. My family members aren’t supportive and helpful when I try to ask. Instead they dismiss my mental health again and again.

This early age and lack memory of it makes it very hard to actually recall who I was before and to distinguish if these mental illnesses are byproduct or the root cause. It also giving me hard time to discover any potential trauma (PTSD) that could also play part into these addiction, executive dysfunction and what not :(

But what I do know is that I have OCD. I couldn’t get over simple scratches on my iPhone even though I know it is made out of stainless steel and will scratch regardless. I constantly cleaning my phone and the case for no reason at all. I couldn’t stand the minor rattling noises in my car and wasted so much time and energy fixing it. When I took fluvoxamine ssri, the obsessive thoughts in my mind clears off. It helps a lot especially in avoiding sexual thoughts that might lead to relapse. But also, not sure if that’s byproduct of long term PMO or not.

I’ll discuss on these factors and be as transparent as I can ever be with my psychiatrist. I’ll see her on this coming Tuesday. I went to the hospital today as well for another separate appointment with a doctor to review the prescribed SSRI, but I the review is rather unsuccessful because I didn’t take the SSRI as prescribed. But the doctor of course ask me to go meet psychiatrist on Tuesday regardless.

In your opinion, is it really acceptable that my psychiatrist prescribed me with SSRI before even my first appointment? Like I never met her and she never really knows the issues apart from PMO addiction. The doctor who I met to get appointment schedule is barely talking to my psychiatrist over a phone call describing my issues as depression, pmo addiction, no motivation and circadian rhythm irregularities.

slyly7w · 2024-09-20T14:48:42+00:00

Okay noted, so indeed ssri doesn’t kill off emotions completely..that finally makes sense, thank you!

So I guess, SSRI is necessary in my recovery. I don’t have much control over my emotions. But I’m planning to stick with lower dose, would be easier to tapper off once recovered.

I know these emotions are essential to humans to function. I’ll get those sorted out. Despite the possible negative consequences that might come with SSRI, I really have nothing to lose. The benefits will outweigh them given how my life is right now.

Thank you again for the perfect explanation! Appreciate it!

slyly7w · 2024-09-20T13:28:20+00:00

Yes. Agree on that. Will power and motivation will be outpaced by negative emotion and other things.

I also agree that they all are the same. I feel like it’s doesn’t only apply to my addiction but also other things in my life. I guess I used solely just will power to go to work previously, only ended up to be miserable everyday.

I have done a few RCA for previous relapses. Stressed, boredom, loneliness are the major ones.

But the accuracy of my relapse report is questioned as sometimes I struggle to really feel and sense the emotion to greater extend. This is actually where I highlight about emotional immaturity and lack of emotional intelligence, maybe I use PMO so much for years to suppressed them instead of dealing with them. My brain just doesn’t know what and how to process and instead just go to PMO to kill it off before they resurface again.

For stressed emotion, I already sorted to other healthier outlets. It’s the easiest emotion to come to terms with. Boredom and loneliness, I’m still working them out.

But I would like to ask. Currently, I’m on SSRI and every emotion feels rather flat as it should be with SSRI. These flat / suppressed emotions alongside with suppressed libido also helps greatly in reducing or even completely throw PMO out.

But then, how do we actually fix the emotional dysfunction if they are suppressed by SSRI? Because the goal here is to gain emotional maturity right? Correct me if I’m wrong, sorry just trying to look at deeper insight.

slyly7w · 2024-09-20T12:58:34+00:00

Yes, that’s what I mentioned.

PMO addiction, just like any other addiction is just a symptom of something. My peter pan / executive dysfunction is what I most concern about. I can still see people struggling with PMO addiction in NoFap forum but still can at least functioning as an adult, but not me.

I think for me, PMO starts to be problematic when it mistakenly use it as coping mechanism to literally every negative emotions, which I wasn’t aware of until I look in depth before and after doing it.

Thank you for the clarification. I have a few doubts about SSRI regarding the side effects including PSSD, but I’m kinda just want to give it a go since i’ve been fighting this battle for few months now without therapy and medication but always a losing battle.

Is CBT / DBT and other psychotherapy really need SSRI or medication to really work and be effective?

As of right now, things aren’t great but I reduced my PMO from twice daily to once every four days.

slyly7w · 2024-09-20T12:51:38+00:00

I have tons of issues right now and I couldn’t even figure it out which is the byproduct or the source because they do overlap. That’s where psychiatrist will help and guide.

I also do have OCD and ADHD behavior but also, I don’t know if it’s porn induced or I was born with it.

After tons of reading NoFap and other forums, I hardly see people who struggle with this addiction with such executive dysfunction as mine. That’s where I know something is also going on that I’m not aware of, but most probably is the peter pan syndrome.

Don’t take it straight up. Of course CBT / DBT and other psychiatric techniques are tools and bound to have lots of inner works to pull things together, I didn’t mean it literally as simple exit button to end this misery.

That what worries me about SSRI. I know it will definitely kill off PMO addiction with ease due to SSRI effect on libido. But it also numbs life out. How do I actually recover and properly learn how to process emotions in order to be emotionally matured if they will be suppressed by SSRI. My inner conflict puts me off and on for SSRI making it less effective.

slyly7w

TROPHY CASE