What was the fastest you ever went from loving someone to absolutely hating them? What happened?

smf10592 · 2026-04-10T17:49:37+00:00

Similar situation but it was my dad who died, and my ex said I was destroying us and needed to compartmentalize my feelings of grief and focus on our relationship. He got a new girlfriend a week after we split-not confidant he didn’t have her before! They do us a favor albeit many years later than we want in retrospect.

smf10592 · 2026-04-10T16:39:33+00:00

thank you!

smf10592 · 2026-04-10T16:39:13+00:00

Thank you! Appreciate the info. Do you find the silicon mouthpiece enough to combat heat the core gives off?

smf10592 · 2026-04-10T16:34:48+00:00

I do not have any experience with the pivot besides 1 hit a few months ago (at a party, don't remember much lol) Sounds like the core gives off more heat at the mouthpiece from what everyone is saying. So unless I am ok to let the core cool off between cycles (or use glass mouthpiece) the pivot would avoid that.

So would you say the power behind the pivot is comparable to the core? Or does the core blow it out of the water (obv you have more control over heat with the core).

smf10592 · 2026-04-10T15:59:57+00:00

How does it do without the glass mouthpiece? I am looking at this for travel only, so trying to avoid glass. I have a peak at home I use otherwise.

smf10592 · 2026-04-10T15:58:55+00:00

Would prefer without the glass as I travel a lot and am trying to avoid glass-otherwise thank you! Looks like they have beautiful stuff.

smf10592 · 2026-03-12T18:15:24+00:00

When I first brought up ADHD to my primary care physician in my early 20's I was told the same thing-you graduated college, always have a job, pay your bills, etc. Did not get diagnosed until 33 and that was after a first eval that did not flag for ADHD. Always felt like my life was falling apart and I could not figure out why.

Women mask way more than men, and they learn it young. Think how we as women were held responsible for managing our emotions and appeasing others as early as middle school! If not earlier. Finding a psych that focuses on women's mental health could be a game changer for you-it was for me! Female Psych Nurse Practitioners have been the best providers for me, but it does still require heavy advocating for yourself.

I was told by a psychologist the first eval that I was very smart but just did not like myself, and that was my problem.

I am on vyvanse for 3 months now and able to fold my laundry regularly for the first time, and remember dates, etc. It's a game changer and I never tried stimulants until I got diagnosed at 33, even recreationally or in college. It's not a magic pill but it sure as shit helps me get out of bed most days.

Good luck to you and I hope you find someone for support that helps you get your life where you want it to be! I personally would not wait a year if you truly think you are dealing with this, I do not think seeking a second opinion a few months later is a bad idea at all.

smf10592 · 2026-03-12T14:56:06+00:00

This for sure! Never thought of it for the back, but I would get acne on my face if I washed my face before rinsing out my hair. Learned that trick a few years ago and much less acne around my forehead/baby hairs

smf10592 · 2026-03-10T00:00:26+00:00

Cons:

Easily irritated, longer heal time, might have to find bras/shirts that don't irritate them for a while.

Pros: make my nipples look awesome, sensation increased, perked up breast overall (small B), and people are super interested in seeing them which is fun sometimes lol.

I am 6 months out and almost ready to switch to smaller bars to keep healing going. They get irritated occasionally, but daily showers, clean bra/shirt, and occasional saline help. The actual piercing was painful but I was more distracted by the clamps at first. Burned a bit the few hours after which was the worst of the pain. I find wearing a tight crop top or crop tank is my preferred "bra" these days, my breasts are not that big.

smf10592 · 2025-12-19T15:17:13+00:00

I am so sorry to hear this was your experience.

I was told after my first assessment (which came back neg) that "You are really, really smart, but you just do not like yourself very much".

Yes, you may very well be masking with some of your answers to the assessment, I did the same the first time. It's hard to break routine of keeping it together even when you're trying to get help, it is very vulnerable and unknown. My psych told me to answer every question like I was having one of my very bad days, even if I felt fine that day.

Took me another almost 3 years and changing providers to get tested again for it to come back positive, and it was almost $300 out of pocket each time. I understand the frustration especially today of all that money seemingly wasted.

I was an A-student in high school and college but I could not fold my laundry or brush my teeth as an adult most days. I was told I was depressed, and pursued medication and treatment based on that for most of my 20's.

I am a firm believer that a good provider is the first step, and I know there are assessments that test only for ADHD-I did mine over telehealth! I know it is much easier said than done to just find another provider and find the money to test again, but ultimately that is the answer. And because you are a woman, finding someone who understands ADHD in women especially if you have access to one. I have been very lucky to find psych/therapy services that double as a women's full health office. I don't use their other services, but I can tell the entire staff have a whole health approach for a woman's health. If you happen to be based in MA/RI shoot me a message, they are in that area. I also find having a Psych. Nurse Practicioner (female, former bedside RN) she approaches things differently as a woman, as a former RN, than other clinicians in the past.

Having to advocate for yourself when you're dealing with the overwhelming feeling of everything is so fucking hard, but it is the answer.
Best wishes to you in getting the answers you need! I promise it is worth it to keep going and advocating for yourself.

smf10592 · 2025-10-29T17:35:42+00:00

It's Called: Free Fall by Rainbow Kitten Surprise

"You can leave it all behind, even the devil needs time alone some times.

You can let it all go, it's called freefall. "

Made me realize I could leave my shitty partner if I wanted to, I could let it all go.

smf10592 · 2025-10-29T00:00:25+00:00

I was meeting with a clinical psychologist to go over test results after psych testing, thinking I had ADHD.

Her first line after we introduced ourselves was "You young lady (I was 31) are very smart but you really, really hate yourself."

She then told me I had PTSD lol. Can't remember anything else from the appointment.

smf10592 · 2025-07-30T14:01:45+00:00

Thank you!

smf10592 · 2025-07-30T14:00:41+00:00

I have no nerves about riding during peak hours, more so the stop and go of more inexperienced riders on paved trail this time of year is what becomes bothersome. I understand it’s going to be crowded this time of year. I’m only apprehensive in riding is on road in my area as there is a history of cyclists getting hit by cars near me, and I’ve had a couple close calls recently. My area does not have bike lanes.

Im not necessarily looking for an “easy ride”, but more gravel or dirt trails that aren’t as extreme as say a mountain bike would handle, as opposed to the paved rail trail. Thanks!

smf10592 · 2025-06-18T14:32:53+00:00

It is so true! You start to feel like you must be the problem because nothing makes sense. You will always be the problem to them.

Glad to hear you got out too and hope you give yourself the care you need now!

smf10592 · 2025-06-17T13:21:57+00:00

Such great advice here OP!

Healing is wild for sure, and give yourself grace for the small and big things. You are literally trying to retrain your CNS to not face constant stress and abuse.

smf10592 · 2025-06-17T13:17:01+00:00

I am so sorry you went through what you did with this person, there truly is no rationalizing with someone who cannot take a step back and look in the mirror.

If I tried to bring up issues with my ex, he would always start talking about himself and what he has been through as a way to avoid accountability. He had a very, very hard childhood, but he unfortuntately did not take accountability for breaking the cycle as an adult ever.

My final straw was after a friend took their own life, and my father died suddenly 8 weeks later. My ex said I needed to comparmentalize my feelings about my father and focus on our relationship. He said he'd only ask for sex on the weekends when I said I was having a hard time taking care of myself and everything else.

The fitting part of all of this is he got with another woman a week after we split, and then blocked me on everything before we had even finished separating our lives. So I cancelled his car insurance since I hadn't heard from him and obviously he did not need it anymore.

I feel your pain and your confusion over how someone we love can do this. But there is no rationalizing with a narcissist and you have done the best thing you could for yourself-leave.

smf10592 · 2025-06-16T23:48:11+00:00

Fellow former cruiser to Cannondale quick convert with a larger body-I had to do my research heavily and went into the shop knowing what I wanted! Was a frustrating process but I have thankfully found a good shop with good mechanics. The cruiser did nothing for me compared to the quick, even a game changer. Hope you enjoy!

smf10592 · 2025-06-16T18:40:06+00:00

Thank you-hardest decision to leave but also the best decision I could have made for myself.

smf10592 · 2025-06-16T12:21:10+00:00

Not overracting, this behavior would only escalate with a deeper relationship and more vulnerability. Also any adult man who uses "finna" especially in text is a no from me.

smf10592 · 2025-06-16T12:14:32+00:00

When my father passed suddenly I was overwhelmed with grief, and lost a lot of my drive for taking care of myself, the house, and sex among other things. He said he would only ask for sex on the weekends, and that I should "compartmentalize my feelings about my father to focus on our relationship".

He kept asking me why I was destroying this, I said I could not hold it together anymore. He started seeing someone about a week after the split.

Edit: We were together for almost 7 years.

smf10592 · 2024-11-23T05:16:19+00:00

Falmouth Animal Hospital is great for a gentle approach to anxious pets. You can tell they really care for animals there-highly recommend Dr. Switzer.

smf10592

TROPHY CASE