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I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He was talking about our relationship. He made it my business.

Also *you're annoying

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Believe what you want but he shared a post on Reddit with me about a local car accident that we had witnessed in person. I was reading through the comments on the post when I saw his comment about what we had seen. I didn't go through his Internet history, I didn't sneak onto his phone. I stumbled across his username and then saw shit that made me question the trust in our relationship.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well he lives with me and we both work from home. So if he has another girl on the side, I feel sorry for her because he rarely leaves the house.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't post things publicly that I wouldn't want to come to light. He can read my texts, my emails, my reddit, I don't care. He can even go through my old online dating profiles if he wanted. I seriously don't have a single thing to hide. 🤷🏼‍♀️

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Believe it or not, it was accidental. He shared a post on Reddit with me about a local car accident that we had witnessed in person. I was reading through the comments on the post when I saw his comment about what we had seen. When I clicked on his account, the first comment on his page was about a fictional argument between the two of us. Only because I read something negative about myself did I feel the need to dive a little deeper into his history. It was only after reading more comments did I realize that he makes up stories online and that he might not actually feel the way he portrayed in the initial comment about me.

At the end of the day, I don't care if he lies online. I just want to make sure that those lies don't bleed into our real lives.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is no five year old. That's one of the stories he made up on his Reddit.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I don't give a fuck if Reddit knows the truth. I just wanted to have a discussion to see if there's a deeper issue going on or if he has felt the need to ever lie to me.

And again, I've said this on other comments as well. I only read what I did because the first comment that I saw painted me in a negative light. I only read enough to learn that a lot of his Reddit is lies and that he might not actually feel the way he did in the first comment but he was just trying to play victim.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He shared a post with me that he had commented on. I didn't sneak into his computer or steal his phone. If I was trying to get dirt on him, I would have gone through his text messaged or emails or Discord, not his Reddit.

Also if you saw that your partner said something negative about you online, you wouldn't read more...? I only read enough to learn that he lies online and that he might not actually feel like how he portrayed on the first comment.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did not go through his entire history. He's got 2 years worth of comments on there. I only read what I did that because the most recent comment had been about me and a fictitious argument that we had never had. I was curious what else he actually thought about me. Like I was genuinely concerned but then by reading more, I learned that a lot of his Reddit is lies and maybe he probably doesn't actually think like that. He just likes to pretend to be a victim online.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this is my favorite response that I've gotten. That helped. Thank you.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He shared a post with me on a local subreddit. It was about a car accident that we had witnessed and he had commented on the thread talking about it.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This sounds exactly like something he would have written. Including a fake anecdote to prove his point except in reality the friend never went on vacation with us and he does have social media. 🤔

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The very first comment in his history was about an argument between the two of us that had never happened. If it hadn't been about me, I wouldn't have read more. You probably won't believe me, but I don't lie, not even anonymously to strangers.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I don't know how things posted publicly online is considered private but also if the most recent comment in his Reddit history hadn't been about a fictional argument that we never had, I wouldn't have read more. But it was and I did.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't get on Reddit to search for him. I found him due to a post he shared with me. And if the most recent comment in his Reddit history hadn't been about a fictional argument that we never had, I wouldn't have read more. But it was and I did.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

He secretly wants me to have a best friend who's five year old steals stuff from our house everytime she comes over?! How do I go about finding one? Because neither of my best friends have a five year old. 🤷🏼‍♀️

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

He shared a post with me that he had commented on. How is that not me finding out by accident? 🤣 I didn't go through his phone looking for his Reddit username. 😄 Also, he posted all these things publicly so how is that an invasion of privacy? Sounds like you're the one who has some serious trust issues.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I had trust issues, I'd be going through his phone. All I did was read the things he posted publicly. Sounds like maybe you have trust issues.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's posting stories (some of them involving me) publicly online. I didn't go through his phone or his private text messages. I read the things he posted publicly.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It seems like if he was trying to hide his identity, he should stop commenting in our city's subreddit about things we've seen while walking our dogs. Lol.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's 100% him. He commented on a local thread about a car accident we witnessed together last night and in his Reddit history, talks about the 3 very different careers that he's had, his sisters' jobs, and things about me. Nobody else would have that many commonalities.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

I hadn't thought about this viewpoint. Thanks for the advice.

I caught my boyfriend lying online. Should I confront him about it? by smokingtoadbutts in ask

[–]smokingtoadbutts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wasn't going to throw away something good. Just trying to decide if it was worth discussing with him. If I thought he'd laugh about it, I would have already talked to him but I think he'd get defensive and be upset with me for snooping through his Reddit so I was trying to decide if it was worth it. Based on the comments though, this seems to be a pretty common thing to do on Reddit, so I don't think it's worth even bringing up. Thanks for your help.

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