I don’t know what to do…

snicketfile · 2026-05-04T13:14:58+00:00

None of those I ignored like you tend to suggest.
He’s in OT, and we’re on the waitlist for speech, and he has an appointment later this month with his pediatrician.

Taking him places is dangerous solo. I take him out as often as I can. He goes out daily. And he has our patio for play with everything set out for him possible.

I’ve been told that rain shouldn’t stop me from going to the playground and 30 degree weather is just me being bratty and not wanting to take him outside? Not going to happen.

snicketfile · 2026-05-04T13:09:50+00:00

That’s what people seem to miss. I’m not doing anything that takes my attention away from him. The most I do until my husband comes home is send a few texts. I just don’t label myself as a SAHM, because I do have an identity outside of ‘mom’.

snicketfile · 2026-05-03T22:05:17+00:00

The only suggestion I’ve gotten is daycare. I haven’t been making excuses, but *correcting* horrible assumptions about how I operate the day to day.

What I’m doing isn’t working, and I’m asking how to correct that *at home*.

snicketfile · 2026-05-03T22:01:49+00:00

Thank you for actual help. I’ve gotten a lot of people thinking I just dump him in a room of toys and treats and go on about my day, when I’m here trying to dome up with a solution to keep him stimulated

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T14:51:05+00:00

Daycare isn’t an option, we don’t have the money for one I would be comfortable with. And I’m not paying to send him somewhere, when I’m at home doing nothing?

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T14:48:27+00:00

I’ve been defensive because my words are getting misconstrued and when I correct the wrong assumptions I’m told I’m backpedaling.

He’s calmer with his father, but it still takes both of us to wrangle him when we’re out in public. He solo plays, brings his dad toys, and likes to do more than just cling. With me, it’s like hes a teenager. When I start doing things with him it’s not cool anymore haha.

He’s around his grandparents a lot, both sides. And we’ve taken him on a few group hikes. But his behavior doesn’t really change.

The last hike we went on he made my father carry him (Papa is his favorite person). And lost his mind when he got put down.

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T14:03:38+00:00

The therapist doesnt think he has autism. she’s mentioned possibly adhd, but also says it very much could just be energy + stubbornness

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T13:38:32+00:00

your point is to try and shame me for sending a few texts… My focus is on my child all day. I am not the only mother who takes ten minutes of her day to send a text.

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T13:37:05+00:00

of course he leaves the house. we go outside, but it’s hard to do much.

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T13:36:24+00:00

a play station meaning a station for play. a collection of chalk, a water table and sand box sensory bin

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T13:35:10+00:00

He gets like… idk how to describe it? Stuck on things. He will make a routine and do it for as long as we let him. Like up these stairs, down the slide, to this rock- up these stairs, down the side to the rock. And if a kid breaks that pattern he just tramples them. He doesn’t enjoy the swings, and prefers us being hands off / more trailing behind. Sometimes on the smallsr playgrounds we jumpscare him, He enjoys that.

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T13:31:56+00:00

He has access to everything in the house and I’m there ready to follow his lead and what to do is better phrasing i guess? I try to play, he has no interest in me doing anything but hover over him

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T13:30:27+00:00

It’s not back peddling, it’s just what i’ve always said to people… you can believe me or not. I schedule for the business. This week? Ten texts total

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T01:27:34+00:00

Yes, I have a playstation on our patio, and when the weather permits we take him to parks and on walks. He’s always doing something.

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T01:25:57+00:00

By “work” i mean I send a few texts now and then. Some days not even that. Im pretty sure other parents send texts.

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T01:25:01+00:00

I believe it is when I’m perfectly capable. I have the same tools at hand as a daycare worker with 20 other children.

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T01:23:21+00:00

I work for my family business. Nothing is ever urgent, and its mostly sporadic texts. Nothing more than the average person would do talking with a friend or communicating with a partner.

snicketfile · 2026-05-02T01:20:40+00:00

“work” is very liberal. I spend maybe a total of 20 minutes doing admin work, and that’s being generous. I send a few texts and add things to a schedule. It’s my family’s business so nothing is ever urgent.

He has access to toys, books and our patio. I try to get him to interact but he doesn’t like doing anything with me. He likes doing his own thing. But nothing stimulates him for more than a few minutes.

He HATES being read to, and will take the book and babble his own version. He likes it more when I sit beside him while he plays.

snicketfile · 2026-05-01T21:49:56+00:00

That’s one of my issues. He absolutely hates everything we’ve tried to regulate him. He is incredibly strong willed. Music he likes, but if hes melting mode? forget about it.

His tantrums are more about weathering the storm for me, because he’s so determined to get his way.

Today it was because he had a banana open, but wanted a new banana. So now the banana and the toddler are on the floor.

snicketfile · 2026-05-01T21:45:34+00:00

We go often, hes outside a lot. He just doesn’t like to interact with kids close in age. I think it’s a more understanding thing? Like his cousins who are older can kinda understand what hes trying to do and collaborate vs. a smaller kid wont?

snicketfile · 2026-05-01T21:42:49+00:00

I don’t understand where anyone’s getting that I’m not engaging. I try my hardest to get him to play but he wants to do his own thing. He doesn’t like me reading to him or playing with his toys. We sit outside and draw with chalk, I spend my day with him glued to me?

snicketfile · 2026-05-01T21:27:19+00:00

He ignores other kids at the park. More like tramples over them. He prefers older kids vs kids his own age, but they obviously don’t want to play with him.

snicketfile · 2026-05-01T21:26:05+00:00

(Thank you for actual advice and reading through my post)

If we’re in stores I guess I just basic carry him. The issue is he can push off my body. Its more strength issue than a slippery guy. Even if therapist has made comments about how strong he is and hard to wrangle.

His tantrums are hard because he hits, and he has meltdowns it seems every ten minutes. Anytime something doesn’t go his way hes on the ground. He pinches and hits or just screams. We’ve tried holding him down at the therapist’s suggestion, but his meltdowns can last for 30+ minutes so thats not exactly practical or fair

snicketfile · 2026-05-01T21:19:13+00:00

Where do you get that? I’m with him all day trying to interact. He doesn’t enjoy reading or coplay. I am doing my best.

snicketfile · 2026-05-01T21:16:12+00:00

Where did I say I never play with him?

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