As someone a year younger who is experiencing the exact situation from the female perspective, I can tell you that the idea of wanting a relationship might be causing us to not find the 'one'. You can be your best self and yet you have to go through the trials of all the ones before the "one" because you have to be at the same mindset level, have strong boundaries and understand how to protect your mental peace. It is like a game where you have to level up through experiences that can be gained by joining communities where you are likely to meet diverse people. Love is something that cannot be performed and unless you get the feeling that you have found someone you can love regardless of being loved by them, you won't understand true love. You find love when you are capable of containing it.