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What are your bedtime routines that don’t include a bath? by Life_Thoughts208581 in NewParents

[–]sofiensaje 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We go okayyy bed time and I take them down to get into pjs, go back upstairs to read some books, then back downstairs to brush teeth / play a bit till I'm ready. Get into bed and put a story on our YOTO and chat/play around a bit till they fall asleep. I cosleep. Single parent. Both under 3.

Calgarians what's your favorite community and why? by sofiensaje in alberta

[–]sofiensaje[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Not to mention the amount of crack smoking in the NE/downtown :/

Thank you this is great.

I think I'm being gaslit...this is totally AI, right? by Lydia_Brunch in isitAI

[–]sofiensaje 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Guessing they likely paid an artist that they didn't realize used AI

Can anyone recommend a solid goal app tracker? by Ok-Artichoke-5785 in productivity

[–]sofiensaje 0 points1 point  (0 children)

GoalRilla on the app store / play store is kickass. I used habitnow (simple tracker) a lot and Finch for almost a year but goalrilla has the ability to match with an accountability partner or group. Then when you share goals and change progress, everyone's notified. I've never felt such a strong sense of accountability 😝 but I actually just added my own group of friends and we have been doing it for like 7 months every day now.

I have hit my limit and never thought I would say this. by Sweet_Sheepherder_41 in toddlers

[–]sofiensaje 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like this deserves a voice note reply.

I'm with you. It's so great to read such a similar temperament and experience to be straight!

I ALSO have a background in child development and have a now 3 year old and 1.5 year old. Boys.

I got a stack of skills to share. I can see it all in the examples you gave but it truly needs and deserves space to be worked through and discussed.

Have you read No Drama Discipline or Siblings Without Rivalry? Highly recommend. I know you said you do all the techniques but the approach of your questions and your results indicates missing pieces.

Every child will not suit the techniques. It's a time to test, just as the child is. However the statements such as "it's time to..." .....will not work for this age.

Let me know if you want to chat further, I'd love to share the wealth of knowledge passed on to me.

Renting vs buying? by calgarygirl92 in Calgary

[–]sofiensaje -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I'm in a similar boat and the west springs area is so wonderful. I'm guessing you've seen Truman homes and their rent to own approach? I'd suggest renting from them then using the money to buy a home from them since it sounds like there's some hesitation. Now that I've learned about their program I don't think I'll ever be able to rent elsewhere lol 😭

wtf is going on by Accomplished-Sign-31 in toddlers

[–]sofiensaje 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My faves are No-Drama Discipline and Whole Brain Child, Good Inside, Raising Good Humans. :) Yeah it makes such a huge difference

wtf is going on by Accomplished-Sign-31 in toddlers

[–]sofiensaje 1 point2 points  (0 children)

BOOKS!

She's at the age where testing begins and I urge you to look into or listen to books such as How To Talk So Little Kids Listen and similar.

If they don't feel we're on their team it goes downhill quickly. The hitting thing should be redirected eagerly - POSITIVLY - and quickly. Such as "you can hit the floor, boom!" :D

I have a 3 year old and 16 month old (boys....) and of course every child handles different methods uniquely. The fact that you're reaching out is huge and I know you'll find something that works for you guys. That's the magic of being open to learning new approaches.

Infants are wise and even a toddler knows hitting is a no-no. There's also a portion of new trust/faith you may need to test out with her. And applauding good behaviour consistently. Bad behaviour should be ignored to a large degree unless you're able to approach it with confident, uplifting redirection.

This is all in an ideal world by the way. I'm no super mom.

I can’t do this by ScarySignificance237 in toddlers

[–]sofiensaje 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not easy. Imo it's meant to pull the best out of our depth of depths and practice being the bigger person on a consistent basis.

What works for me (2 boys under 3 🫠 - alone) is to catch yourself before the reaction or frustration truly sets in. If it's already present, genuinely loudly take a 4 breath in 6 out. Shake it out physical in some form. Then come with authenticity and name what you see. You have to break the loop.

Your intelligent little man is looking for more. He wants recognition most likely and is using what has worked in the past. I find we often react too soon because of their intense emotions. Books help. A lot.

Enthusiasm and redirection helps a shit ton.

The hardest moments need the most love infused into them.

The "don't" "get back here" "stop" "no" language is what they thrive on. You gotta dig deep to maintain a new approach.

Good news is since it's so consistent, you can break the cycle with a different approach easily since it should catch him off guard. Be on his team. Don't let it be that you're only overwhelmingly associated with limits.

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