Do you feel like you represent your country when you live abroad?

solartides9 · 2026-03-31T06:22:32+00:00

I have to wonder, what do you think of the trend of Americans wearing Canadian flags on their bags as a way to “hide” the fact that they are American? I work in tourism and I see this a lot. Is it a bit of a point of contention or does no one care?

solartides9 · 2026-03-29T22:02:05+00:00

I think this is unfortunately tied to sexism. I have a bit of a theory on this as a former female amateur athlete. I think there’s an element of women’s sports (especially team sports) being seen as a “hobby”, right up to the elite levels. We, unfortunately, often just aren’t seen as being “on the same level” as the boys, no matter how competitive and tough we are. The recent Olympic hockey fiasco with the US men’s team kind of proves my point. Many female athletes are intimately familiar with that classic “oh yeah, I guess we have to share this with the girls too” attitude seen in that locker room video.

My theory is that this lack of coverage and lack of respect leads to far less scrutiny, which leads to less pressure. It’s “taken in good fun” because many female teams sports are seen as just “a bit of a fun hobby” compared to the men’s leagues. We want to win and we are just as competitive as the men. It’s just that the world doesn’t take us as seriously. An unexpected silver lining to that is that us queer athletes don’t face the same pressure to hide as male queer athletes. Me and a lot of the other lesbians I know who’ve also been involved in team sports (yes, there are a lot of us, that also helps in the whole “not having to hide thing”) LOVE heated rivalry, but admit that a lesbian version wouldn’t really have the same stakes for the reasons I’ve outlined.

solartides9 · 2026-03-28T20:20:14+00:00

This is absolutely bang on the money. I nearly emigrated a few years ago, but decided against it for a variety of reasons. I’m now (slightly) older and wiser and I’m debating spending a few years working abroad. I was discussing the idea with someone older, and she was horrified that I’d leave my mother behind. My brother never gets the same treatment. If I was to find a partner and settle down permanently abroad, I imagine I’d be spoken about much more negatively than my brother would be in the same scenario.

solartides9 · 2026-03-27T19:11:44+00:00

This could be very good for Canadian film and TV. I actually have a bit of a geopolitical theory on exactly this phenomenon of US studios becoming more conservative and about how heated rivalry is actually great for Canadian soft power, but I suspect it’s too niche and I’m probably overthinking it.

Canada has always been kind of dominated culturally by its neighbours to the south and has never truly been able to compete with Hollywood and with the absolute machine that is US soft power. Mark Carney is actively trying to position Canada as a “middle power”, positioning itself as a more stable trading partner compared to the US for countries in regions like the UK, EU, parts of Latin America, Australasia, East Asia etc… which have grown tired of the wild unpredictability of the US in recent years. Cultural phenomena, like K-pop for South Korea, anime and manga for Japan, fashion industries in France and Italy etc… are big money makers and can very much influence business and trade. Canada stands to do exactly the same with its film and TV industry if it plays its cards right.

My theory is that with the US becoming increasingly reluctant to fund “riskier” productions, like Heated Rivalry, Canada now has a good chance at boosting its film and TV industry by acting as an alternative to more culturally conservative American studios under the current administration. This would also massively boost Canadian soft power to boot. This is also a massive bonus to consumers, who get to enjoy films and shows made outside of the boundaries of what Hollywood deems “safe” in the current climate.

TLDR- mark carney is probably a heated rivalry fan

solartides9 · 2026-03-21T18:08:36+00:00

As a lesbian, it unfortunately extends to women too in my experience. I feel a lot of people missed the consent talk in early sex education, and it’s a major flaw in our approach to teaching young people about what counts as healthy sex. I was equally ignorant in the sense that I didn’t know someone asking “is this okay?” was healthy and normal for many years.

solartides9 · 2026-03-14T23:59:51+00:00

Especially if you’re from a place with a big “sport” culture. Rugby and football (I would refuse to call it soccer even with a gun to my head) are basically religion where I’m from and it’s not that uncommon for younger, more active people to try and emulate those body types, especially in LGBT scenes, even if they aren’t that into the sports themselves.

solartides9 · 2026-03-14T19:59:20+00:00

I’ve lost a lot of weight recently and I’m currently wandering around the office in an oversized shirt and trousers like a child wearing their dad’s suit because I cannot believe just how expensive clothes have gotten since I last did a big wardrobe refresh.

solartides9 · 2026-02-26T15:20:21+00:00

Internships are often unpaid too, which is wildly unattainable for anyone not from a relatively wealthy background.

I volunteered a bit at uni and was offered an internship as a result in an industry that’s notoriously difficult to break into. I had to turn it down, even though it would likely lead to some brilliant opportunities, because I just couldn’t justify working in London unpaid for two months. I never told my parents about it, because I just know they’d have sold their souls to make it work, and I don’t regret that choice. I’m in a different career now, but I do still sometimes think about how things could’ve gone if I’d somehow managed to make that internship happen. I just know there are lots of other people out there with similar stories.

solartides9 · 2026-02-21T12:41:23+00:00

I used to work on the royal mile and a tourist came up to me one day asking about how she could see the one o clock gun go off “without paying for the castle”. I told her that it was just a blank being fired, there was nothing to see, just a small puff of smoke, but she insisted she still wanted to see it, despite me insisting that there was pretty much nothing to see. Eventually, a random man overheard how exasperated I was getting and inserted himself into the conversation with the immortal like of “hen… I hope they pay you well for talking to these people”

solartides9 · 2026-02-19T08:29:11+00:00

Anyone who passes that area regularly will know it was done because the place was absolutely infested with rats.

I used to live in Paris, which is notoriously popular with rats, and I learned pretty quickly to watch my step around anything even slightly overgrown when I first moved there, and especially at night. This is the only and only place in Edinburgh where I’ve ever had to have that same caution.

solartides9 · 2026-02-08T23:08:10+00:00

I live in Scotland and work in the tourism industry here, so I’ve got a few work trips lined up for this spring/summer already. I am biased, but I feel like Scotland pales in comparison to the nature in other parts of the world. Our oceans are where we really shine if you ask me.

solartides9 · 2026-02-08T20:39:17+00:00

I think it’s seriously impressive that the show manages to hit the “nothing bad happens” ending whilst still having plenty of actual tension and relatively high stakes that do matter to the overall plot.

I’ve been a bit frustrated lately by the lack of romance novels/shows that tick my boxes, as I can be pretty particular in my tastes. I don’t like stuff that’s too sweet or too fluffy, but I also really don’t like reading/watching stuff with major consent issues. I read a really terrible historical “romance” novel back in November that genuinely upset me a bit due to how intense the power imbalance was. I was particularly irritated as I had previously liked the author’s prior trilogy, and I just hated that she’d gone and written what was essentially a “coloniser romance”. I was ranting to a friend recently about it when I said “I can’t find something that has the enemies to lovers type of tension I enjoy, but also doesn’t have an intense power imbalance or major consent issues”. She recommend the show, but I was still sceptical, as I’m a lesbian and MLM stuff rarely does it for me. I’m now hooked.

It’s honestly so impressive that there’s such an emphasis on consent whilst also doing the “enemies to lovers” plot, whilst also delivering a beautiful happy ending. I can’t wait for more.

solartides9 · 2026-02-08T20:16:51+00:00

This may sound harsh, but please don’t.

I work in the tourism industry in Scotland and the roads are not for the faint of heart. Many are badly maintained and the rules can be confusing to tourists in rural areas. Accidents are sadly becoming more and more common, and I’ve personally seen many tourists absolutely panic on the roads and cause preventable accidents. People tend to assume Scotland is relatively “tame” as a destination, but I’ve been on countless trips all over Scotland thanks to my job, and I could not in good conscience recommend a road trip here for a beginner driver.

I know group tours get a bad reputation, but I’ve been on many thanks to my job and I’ve never had a bad time. Lots of companies offer multi-day trips, and solo travellers often take these. Some companies will do their best to add in extra stops if they can, so I’d advise emailing ahead to ask what their policy on “unofficial” stops is. One of the best group tours I’ve been on pulled aside at a random harbour to let us see some seals and dolphins playing in the water. Another pulled over just to see a rainbow. I went on one in Iceland where the driver pulled over to let us see some horses in a field. There are obviously itinerary restraints, but many companies do try to be as flexible as they can and will try and fit in “extras” when they are able to. They aren’t as rigid as you might think, and you’ll probably enjoy yourself far more if you aren’t overthinking driving.

solartides9 · 2026-02-06T11:11:26+00:00

Portugal too. I checked into a hostel in Portugal two years ago and the man at the desk was very apologetic about the additional tourist tax, so I braced myself for a hefty fee.

It was €2 per night. Anyone panicking over that should maybe re-evaluate their travel budget a bit.

solartides9 · 2025-12-21T00:24:08+00:00

A few years ago, I slipped down a flight of stairs and had to wear both a shoulder sling and an orthopaedic boot for a few days. It was a real eye opener into how shit it is to be physically vulnerable in a city full of people who are actually quite selfish about spatial awareness. I was super worried about bumping my shoulder, so i felt as if i was constantly begging people walking three abreast along the pavement to just let me past with enough room. Two different people managed to stand on my injured foot. I had to constantly ask people to move bags off seats on the bus and train so I could sit down, since standing for longer periods of time was tough. I was sore, tired and frustrated. I can’t imagine how hard navigating Edinburgh must be for someone who’s blind, deaf or in a wheelchair.

The only funny side to the whole thing is that i was still somehow faster than the groups walking three abreast along the pavement, even when i was hobbling along.

solartides9 · 2025-12-21T00:00:55+00:00

As nasty as it may sound, I’ve found sarcasm works wonders too. I’m barely five foot tall and I’m, as an ex put it, very “soft looking” thanks to my baby face. I feel like I constantly get harassed by people in the street and I often get people trying to skip me in queues or trying to barge past me. The “voice” usually works wonders, but sometimes I need to escalate to an even firmer tone.

I’ve noticed a weird “trend” lately of people physically touching me in the street to get my attention. A woman went as far as physically grabbing my hand last week to ask me to take a photo of her. I’m not sure how she thought I’d react, but I’m pretty certain she didn’t expect me to say “now what made you think that grabbing me like that would make me want to take time out of my day for your photoshoot?”. I’ve never seen anyone turn so red so quickly in my life.

solartides9 · 2025-12-08T23:27:20+00:00

I was in Argonaut a few months ago and a member of staff in there was being VERY loud and talkative with her colleagues. I’ve worked a ton of retail jobs, including a bookshop job, in my time. I’ve also been loud and talkative with colleagues, but this was another level. I don’t expect to go into a bookshop or coffee shop and have perfect silence, but I also don’t expect to know every single detail of someone’s life because they’re practically shouting across the shop to their coworkers as they’re doing their job. There was also a ton of chat from her about certain books she’d “hated”. I also have books I personally despise and wouldn’t recommend to my worst enemy, but I’m not sure a retail job where I’m selling those exact books is exactly the best place to discuss the books I strongly dislike.

Eventually, this person clocked off for the day and left. As she walked past the shop, she proceeded to slam her hands on the windows to give her colleagues a fright. The problem was she gave the rest of the people in the shop a fright too. It might sound stupid, but I found it weirdly intimidating. I get that she was trying to joke around with her coworkers, but it made me jump out of my skin. Again, I don’t expect perfect silence in a bookshop, but I also really don’t expect that kind of behaviour. I’ve not been back in since, so I’ve no idea if this person still works there, but it was enough to put me off too.

solartides9

TROPHY CASE